bored of that now
you know when you meet someone for the first time and you're meant to say "well hello, my name's whatever the fuck, how are you? what do you do? how much is your house worth and what car do you drive?" but really you want to disembowel them and tie their intestines in a granny knot then smother the last breath from them with their own pancreas, well yeah, that never happens to me, what never happens to you?

alt: Hitler was right

pricks
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:34, archived)

I never get any time to myself.
I need time to myself.
I might kill my family and girlfriend.
( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

Practice on yourself first.
You wouldn't want to get it wrong in public.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

Oh shit.

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:45, archived)

I've not seen a bullfinch.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

I saw one in a jigsaw puzzle.

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:36, archived)

There were other animals too.

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:37, archived)

Christ.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:37, archived)

Oh, what now?

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:46, archived)

I got this jigsaw from a charity shop, right, and one of the pieces, the edge was all tattered and the shape looked like the face of JESUS

(Drimble 0891 50 50 50, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

I have. Conclusive proof that I am better than you. You should kill yourself.

( spesh, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:38, archived)

You're still shit though.
You could be infinitely better than me and we'd both still be shit.
Out of all of us here, it doesn't really matter who is better than who. We're all shit. And evaluation beyond that is shit.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:41, archived)

I might go and cut myself now

( spesh, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:42, archived)

No point.
Cut-shit. Uncut-shit. No difference worth noting. Both shit.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:44, archived)

you're being a right mardy prick today

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:47, archived)

Soz.
It's because I'm shit.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:48, archived)

What if we all tell you how amazing you are?

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:49, archived)

Maybe we could all chip together and buy you a cake?

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:50, archived)

A load of shit people pretending to like me.
Great.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

I'm glad you like this idea.

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

It won't happen I just thought I'd get your hopes up

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:51, archived)

What do mean
I slept in the woods with a bear last night?
( Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:53, archived)

We know.
We want to know why.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:54, archived)

There's someone that works in my building that looks a bit like a porn actress
Do you think she'd let me fuck her based purely on that opinion?
( Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:56, archived)

definitely.
Just grab her tits
( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:56, archived)

I remember sex.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:58, archived)

Good

( Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:59, archived)

Yeah.

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:56, archived)

Fucking hell

( Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:52, archived)

Tell me about it.
I don't mean that literally, obviously.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:54, archived)

*figuratively tells you about it*

( Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:55, archived)

I WANT TO DO SOMETHING INTERESTING NOW THANKS

( MONO!, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

poke uncooked spaghetti down your weehole then batter your penis flat with a rubber mallet

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:58, archived)

I ask all the best questions here

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:57, archived)

You jsut say what we're all thinking
Namely, "pricks"
( Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Thu 3 May 2012, 12:58, archived)