You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Talk » Message 7497774

JMG.
Liverpool's a bit rough, isn't it?
Blimey..

Give your one line destination reports. No fatties.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 14 May 2012, 13:06, archived)
Ukraine has shit roads and cheap watermelons

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine and then you go and spoil it all, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:11, archived)
all water melons are shit

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:14, archived)
eventually, after you eat them
LOL!
(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:48, archived)
I had no idea Ukraine had watermelons in the first place, let alone cheap ones

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:14, archived)
that's unsurprising, considering you're a blinkered middle-class American-worshipping fool

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine and then you go and spoil it all, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:29, archived)
do they have shoes?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:36, archived)
Even for you, Grrpants, that was shit. If it wasn't Poland's national sport, I'd ask you to stop feeling sorry for yourself and try harder.

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:38, archived)
I've got a better one;
You are shit. Fuck off and die.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:40, archived)
What can I do to make you feel this?

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:45, archived)
Kill yourself.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:47, archived)
What can I do to get you there?

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:59, archived)
Stop quoting lyrics like a fucking child and kill yourself.
Just stop with the shit posts for five minutes and at least give the idea proper consideration. Don't be put off by suicide's negative connotations. Put that to one side of your mind. Genuinely and sensibly give suicide a chance in your mind. Then do it, you pathetic little prick.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:10, archived)
There's only so much I can take

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:30, archived)
I'M A SCATMAN

(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:36, archived)
*bebops*

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:40, archived)
This thread needs more Man Parrish

(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:45, archived)
pool, wet.

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:14, archived)
fucking southern shandy drinking poofters, the lot of them.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:16, archived)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:28, archived)
not you, scousers.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:42, archived)
>:(

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:45, archived)
well, that settles it you really are a total prick.

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:50, archived)
I'm only genetically scouse. I don't have the nasal accent or anything :(

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:58, archived)
bad enough

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:36, archived)
:( Discrimination! Where's my lawyer-hat, I need to sue your arse.
*Rummages*
(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:46, archived)
If you're gonna sue me I like the odds of me ending up with everything you own. like your stupid frisbees.
I'm gonna have fun thinking of ways to ruin them!
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:54, archived)
Ah but if I go through Legal Aid you'll die of old age before this ever kicks off
mwahaha
(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:17, archived)
Everyone south of John o' Groats?

(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:36, archived)
who the fuck is that?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:42, archived)
I know a man with a john o' groats named smith

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:43, archived)
what's his jack o' groats called?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:45, archived)
TERRIBLE
I have a headache and it's raining. What are you going to do about it?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:46, archived)
stop dry dry wetting yourself

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:49, archived)
Well it's not going to dry dry wet itself, is it?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:51, archived)
There should be a really bad tribute band called Dry Dry Wet.
That's about as far as I've thought it through, somebody else take over
(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:07, archived)
A tribute to who?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:10, archived)
at a guess, i'd say wet wet wet?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:22, archived)
That's a bit 'on the nose' isn't it?
It'd be better if it were a tribute to the Rolling Stones.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:24, archived)
I am ashamed to admit that it was a loooong way for that penny to drop :/

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:34, archived)
i suppose i could sympathise
there there, etc
(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:50, archived)
Huh
"Mod"
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:52, archived)
i'm pretty sure that rule one in the mod book is 'don't give a shit about any of the forum users'

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:22, archived)
I don't want you to care
I want you to cure my headache and stop the rain
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:25, archived)
Make yourself a strong coffee
take 2 paracetamol and two ibuprofen, and then chug a pint of water.
(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:35, archived)
FRISBEE ADAM FOR MOD!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:36, archived)
People would live fitter, healthier lives but it'd be ever so dull, even I know that :S

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:40, archived)
I'd be a 47-year-old virgin sitting around in his pyjamas, sipping a banana-broccoli shake
oh wait
(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:44, archived)
Raw or steamed?
This is important
(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:49, archived)
Normally, I prefer my virgins battered then fried

(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:53, archived)
I like mine like I like my coffee
Ground up and in the freezer
(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:55, archived)
get to fuck

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:02, archived)
BOOOO!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:08, archived)
will your headache out of existence like a real man
borrow michael eavis' cloud-bursting magic cannon

JOB. DONE.
(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:03, archived)
It's actually starting to lift now
Thank you Manolith.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:09, archived)
dry, dry, wet, headache

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:18, archived)
poor mrs twohats

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:24, archived)
FINE then, sign up and don't post on the messageboard you miserable cunt, see if I care

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:28, archived)
It's much more colourful than here, I'll give you that

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:35, archived)
thats what i did, forgot my password after i typed it, ¡¡¿

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:03, archived)
you can have a new one if you want, I wrote that bit of code now

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:25, archived)
It's just more of the same.
But slightly more depressingly shit.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:21, archived)
It is very rubbish
Sorry Francis
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:25, archived)
yeah but
no one's ever discussed frisbees there
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:26, archived)
that's a bonus

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:43, archived)
Nobody's discussed Frisbees here for a while, though.

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:44, archived)
worst Martini ever

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine and then you go and spoil it all, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:29, archived)
Ha, nice

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:36, archived)
I'm on a highway to hell

(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:24, archived)
Goodison Park. Blimey.

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 14 May 2012, 13:31, archived)
JMG.
How come you aren't The Moderator, but manolith is?
What's all that?
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:34, archived)
I'm in charge.
I just don't go yelling about it at the top of my lungs.
Gent.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 14 May 2012, 13:51, archived)
Portsmouth City Council built a tall tower in a bid to get further away from Portsmouth while remaining in Portsmouth.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:36, archived)
The Isle Of Wight
Is fucking shite.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:36, archived)
The unpublished second print in the 'Skegness' poster series

(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:37, archived)
Southampton is exactly as shit as Portsmouth but bigger.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:37, archived)
I much prefer Southampton
Might move there. Probably won't.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:38, archived)
Chichester has peregrin falcons in it's church tower.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:38, archived)
what sound do they make when you pull their ropes?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:43, archived)
Go! Sport! Gosport? No thanks.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:39, archived)
Landport...it's not that close to a port but it IS on some land

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:42, archived)
Come to Porchester where old people fester and chavlets parade in the street
There's nothing to do and no one will want you, but the pub has a raffle for meat.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:42, archived)
Southsea; taking some stones and calling them a beach.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:42, archived)
this is niche material, bm

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:46, archived)

h
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:47, archived)
I'm only writing for the cool kids.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:48, archived)
do hilsea

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:52, archived)
Hilsea, where it's still shit just ever so slightly less shit.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:57, archived)
Copnor - Quiet, yet Pointless

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:59, archived)
Ooh, no, I know...
Hilsea; home to the shittest Italian restaurant in the world. Honestly, someone should stab that fucking midget in the face. He buys most of the food ready made in Lidls. No joke. I've seen him doing it.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:03, archived)
When my missus was in banking, he was one of her clients
She hated him. Apparently he was a complete prick and rude to pretty much everyone he came into contact with.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:05, archived)
I might pop in on the way home and shit on one of the tables.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:06, archived)
Fair enough

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:10, archived)
Bognor Regis has a Butlins

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:46, archived)
Thailand; where thai-knee tempur flies a thai fighter to thai rack to buy thai-ers for his car and gets back home before bed thai-me.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:47, archived)
Liverpool; no good now Richard and Judy have moved to London.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:51, archived)
Belgium! Because if you don't have anything to do, it's as good a place as any to do it.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:52, archived)
India, it fucking stinks.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:52, archived)
This. Also Morocco, Tunisia and France.

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder I've got you wrapped around my finger, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:36, archived)
Egypt: chaos, racism and amazing diving

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:53, archived)
Israel!
Proving that Jews are nothing but trouble.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:53, archived)
I'm eating a Chomp!
A Chomp!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:53, archived)
I thought he was busy being popular on offtopic

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:55, archived)
Last time I had one of those, that was exactly the noise my mouth made.

(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 13:59, archived)
ipswich- at least it's not in norfolk.

(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia living la vida loony, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:22, archived)
it is when you go there
BAM!
(Cabbages. Knickers. It's not got a beak, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:30, archived)
I went to Norwich this morning
got some books and some bunting. My Jubilee house is going to piss all over baldmonkeys effort.
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:18, archived)
Hollywood, it's full of gypsies!
No, not that one, the one near Birmingham.
(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder I've got you wrapped around my finger, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:35, archived)
approved

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible prick wanker, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:42, archived)
Birmingham; all the smoke from the cadbury factory contains chocolate residue which sticks to everyone's skin which is why you don't see any white folk.

(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:45, archived)
This is what I was told as a child.
People don't lie to children.
(I helped save b3ta! baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:57, archived)
My Nan used to say to us boys
"You'd better not end up bringing a black girl home"
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 9/11 still freaks my nut out to this day, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:09, archived)
when my grandma met my cousin's indian boyfriend for the first time she went 'oh my god!'

(I helped save b3ta! manolith - six seasons and a movie, Mon 14 May 2012, 15:42, archived)
dundee, arsehole o tha wurld, ken?

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:42, archived)
they've got a desperate dan statue you can get a photo of you getting stabbed next to

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:45, archived)
they also have an "international airport"
yeah, flights to Leeds don't count as international.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:46, archived)
i dunno man, i liked the first film, he was like a fish out of water was mic

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:47, archived)
LOL!

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:48, archived)
Milton Keynes
No, I don't know why either.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Mon 14 May 2012, 14:47, archived)
I don't know what a milton keynes is :'(

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:49, archived)
It's a bit like a really badly laid out shopping centre,
But people live there.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig is a stupid cunt., Mon 14 May 2012, 14:50, archived)
I think I had one when I was younger, mum got me one instead of a tamagochi, the cow

(I helped save b3ta! NSA Agent Screening your lols since, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:52, archived)
a massive council estate

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:52, archived)
it has the national hockey arena in it!
wow, goodtimes.
(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:55, archived)
The name always makes me think of
So we were treated to this magnificent spectacle of this eight-foot freak, eyes different colours, wearing a rubber corset, down on one knee shouting "MILTON KEEEEYNES".
(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Mon 14 May 2012, 14:52, archived)