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First talk post.
Well... I've been lurking around on B3ta for a while now and now I think I've gone past a point where I should start contributing to the awesomeness that is B3ta.

*ahem*

What would happen if you asked every person, AI program and search engine the same question? When you think about it, the internet is a very powerful super computer with biological integration, with emotions and morels, (people in other words.)

I thunked it today and thought I might as well give this question to you. You magnificent bastards.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:22, archived)
At once? Not much.
Some people would answer, most would tell you to fuck off you crazy bastard I don't know you. The chat bots would chatter and google would return porn.
(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:25, archived)
Oh man,
I love porn.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:48, archived)
i like the porn with the furry anime girls with cocks

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:49, archived)
I don't.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:56, archived)
Well, what kind of porn do you like?

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:57, archived)
Well,
I like cocks. But not furry anime girls. Sorry.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:59, archived)
:) it's why you post here with all us other massive cocks

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:01, archived)
/board would be a lot better if it had more massive cocks.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:03, archived)
6" sorry

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:04, archived)
COCKS
COCKS EVERYWHERE

I like cocks that spurt lots of cum and fat balls.

I also, however, like it when these things are attached to girls, furry girls, anime girls, or furry anime girls.
(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:04, archived)
Why would the mushrooms make any difference?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:31, archived)
no cunt has offered me any mushrooms, what am i black or summit?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:39, archived)
Wait ... are you not a negro?
Man. That's ruined my "I've heard of a black man who goes fishing." anecdote.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:50, archived)
I'll be your other token black friend, Dr. S

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:51, archived)
Sweet.
Can we buttfuck and everything? I've heard that's what black friends do "in the 'hood" and that.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:03, archived)
Woah there,
this isn't a fishing forum. Let's have a little less stereotyping please.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:04, archived)
Shit. Yeah. Soz.
Not all black people live in the 'hood. The Huxtables lived in a nice house in the 'burbs.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:05, archived)
only if you're on the DOWN LOW, as the vernacular is on the 'street'

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:05, archived)
once in my life i have seen a black man carp fishing, great way to troll carp forums back in the day, they ban those threads now straight off, gets a bit nf within moments

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:54, archived)
I don't think I'd like to be on a NF friendly forum.
Probably best if I avoid all fishing related forums and stick with Betfair and this place.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:56, archived)
all fishing forums are racist, because black men dont fish

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:57, archived)
Is it because of the smell?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:04, archived)
i think it is something to do with migration for work, most of the work is not in places with lakes in the 1960's, and it really aint safe to fish inner city now

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:12, archived)
you'd get a load of different answers, ranging from wrong to right

(Fu Manchu http://www.supermatt.net, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:35, archived)
I was thinking.
If you made a program that could take all the data and average the words and stuff out till you get a single answer.

I dunno.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:54, archived)
I think they'd all reply with a photo of a child sucking its finger while looking at a dog's bum

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:36, archived)
in before everyone assfucks you about your name
nobody calls themselves ninjas anymore HAVEN'T YOU HEARD
(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:37, archived)
who were you?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:39, archived)
I am McLovin

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:40, archived)
It's old.
I think I made it up when I was 11 and I just stuck with it because I have no imagination.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:46, archived)
Wait ... are you 13?
Hummina!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:51, archived)
No.
Made the name up for online gaming, I think. Just popped into my head when I was creating a account on B3ta. Sorry if I caused a problem.

How do I change the name?
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:52, archived)
first you have to stick your fingers in your own butthole and then tell us how it went

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:53, archived)
tits or gtfo

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:55, archived)
( . ) ( . )

(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:56, archived)
No?

(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:56, archived)
Then why the fuck don't you know the difference between ethics and mushrooms, you fucking retard?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr. Shambolic Minister for Sport for Papua New Guinea, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:04, archived)
troll

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:38, archived)
Troll?

(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:39, archived)
¡¡¡¡¡ TROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLL !!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:41, archived)
B3TA UNITED : 1 NINJA SMOKE CLAN: 0

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:41, archived)
Well..
At least I feel as though I have contributed to B3ta for once and have annoyed a few people.

Sorry if I did.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:44, archived)
nah, you've actually made the first intesting post in days
prick
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible prick wanker, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:46, archived)
OH SHIT YOU GUYS HERE COMES MR HORRIBLE
IT'S THE MOTHER FUCKING RAPE TRAIN AND IT HAS NO BRAKES
(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:49, archived)
I've gone all soft from over expectation now

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible prick wanker, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:56, archived)
hm, i guess the rape train does have brakes

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:58, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:41, archived)
Stop trolling us you cunt.

(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:46, archived)
Troll.
I don't like that word. Especially now that it's been over-used and You just called me one.

Ass.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:51, archived)
Why did you capitalise you,
you thick, gay cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:55, archived)
And that shite below is like a really bad Two Ronnies sketch.
I'm glad I missed that thread.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:47, archived)
alright neps, goodwood coming up, do you go?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:49, archived)
You know what?
It just came on my radar today. Haven't been for a couple of years, it's quite a long way from Coventry, but I reckon I may be going this year. It's a bit special there. You been?

Dad wants to go to York next month. That's fine. I like York too.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:54, archived)
last time i went to goodwood was over ten ago, i'd like to go back, i might find it a circus now tho, dunno

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:57, archived)
It's like a better dressed Epsom.
Last time I was there it rained. After the Nassau and the Stewards cup I had had enough and left, but on my way out I passed the lawn where they had a band on and it was just a load of umbrellas bouncing up and down because they weren't going to stop dancing just because of a bit of rain. I liked that.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:02, archived)
Hey now woah hold on there
F U N E X?
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine and then you go and spoil it all, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:56, archived)
i didn't know the ronnies did bad sketches, even when barker was too old and dying he was alright, clarence was utter rubbish tho

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:59, archived)
phantom raspberry blower was shit

(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:02, archived)
nah it wernt, come back here you is lol

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:14, archived)
I used that as a subject line in an email I sent to the whole company at the weekend
I'm waiting to go back next week to hear all the people ask wtf I was talking about
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:01, archived)
I don't think it is going to take them a week to work it out.
One of them might even have seen the sketch. I believe it's been on TV more than once.
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:03, archived)
I work with stupid people
and I changed the X to relate to a client so a google search wouldn't return anything
(I helped save b3ta! magnum, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:06, archived)
Lurk more

(I helped save b3ta! mark morrisons prison shoes like a metrosexual bellend or something, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:51, archived)
sup /b/ lol u tk him 2 da bar

(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:52, archived)
Sorry.
I don't know what that means.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 20:59, archived)
none of us do

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:00, archived)
Great.
And now I don't feel left out.
(Night_ninja, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:02, archived)
everyone else is having sex and you're not

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine and then you go and spoil it all, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:09, archived)
Y HELO THAR
BUTTSEX????11!?
(I helped save b3ta! Alligator Shitfuck 2-1 Stay Frosty, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:27, archived)
EVERY person? You'd be lucky to live that long.
Or unlucky, depends on your view. Either way you'd spend your whole life asking one question over and over and would probably go insane quite quickly.
(Drimble Show me, don't tell me, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:12, archived)
I'd like to take this opportunity to welcome you to talk

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:13, archived)
shit, this could be sarah

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:15, archived)
well I can't sing, I do like a drink, etc etc

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:17, archived)
hi, hello, sorry about all that stuff, comedy forum, are you sarah harding by any chance?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:16, archived)
She called me an ass.
You wouldn't still fuck her after that, surely?
(I helped save b3ta! Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:17, archived)
pffffffft

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 17 Jul 2012, 21:18, archived)