» The nicest thing someone's ever done for me

A simple 'phone call...
A friend and I had gone to a football match. Long story short: Hilsborough, April 15th 1989, Leppings Lane terracing.
Eventually, we got back to the side-street where he'd parked his car and were getting ready for the trek back to Liverpool. Some guy comes out of a nearby house and walks up to us.
"Been to the match?" he asked.
We nodded.
"Would you like to use my 'phone to call your folks - tell them your ok?"

It's the little things that mean the most - thanks mate.
(Wed 8th Oct 2008, 16:07, More)

» Cringe!

Pacemaker...
I'd got one of those new-fangled l.c.d. watches and the novelty of the hour-chime hadn't worn off yet.
"Beep, beep", said my watch.
"What the fuck's that?" asked W.
"Shit!" I replied, "It's the low-battery warning on my pacemaker."
It was while I was thumping my chest, and shouting "Start - you bastard!", that I remembered that W's father had died, not three days before, of a heart attack.
(Fri 28th Nov 2008, 17:34, More)

» Money-saving tips

Save £1000's...
Bit of a long-term one...

You will need:
1) Standard 'repayment' mortgage.
2) Interest bearing 'savings' account.
3) Job that pays more than you usually spend.

At the end of each month, bung as much as you can, of any spare cash you have, into the savings account.
Your mortgage will have an 'anniversary', at which point (Debt + Interest - Repayments = New Debt) will be calculated along with your new repayment rate.
About one month prior to this, empty the savings account (maybe leave £0.01 in it, just to keep it ticking over) and use the money to make a "CAPITAL REPAYMENT" on your mortgage. This reduces the Debt figure in the above calculation and, therefore, reduces the new repayment rate - which means you will have MORE spare cash to bung into the savings account so that, at the end of the next year...

Note that there may be a 'penalty' for doing this in the 'early' part of the mortgage (usually the first four years) - you need to do the maths to see if it's worth it; but once this period is over it DEFINITELY IS worth it.

Over time, you will pay off your mortgage years, perhaps even decades, earlier and will save literally thousands of pounds.

Mortgage companies HATE this.
I've done it, it works and I LOVE it.

(Apologies for lack of teh funneh)
(Tue 15th Nov 2011, 15:36, More)

» Mad Stuff You've Done To Get Someone To Sleep With You

Let her dress me up as a girl...
...make-up, wig, the lot; before spending a good hour eating her out. Then she tied me up, ass-fucked me with a strap-on and took photographs. As a reward, I got to spend the rest of the evening shagging her silly!

No wait - this is a fantasy. Ladies, if this sort of thing appeals to you...
(Fri 13th Apr 2007, 17:24, More)

» Stuff You've Overheard

Nice of you to own up...
In one of those weird pub moments, when everything goes quiet for no apparent reason, I heard a young woman exclaim, "The common term for it is 'buggery' - I should know, I've had it done to me".
(Thu 10th Jun 2004, 13:43, More)