b3ta.com user Hidden Mouse, Sleeping Kitten
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HMSK










Some of you seem to find me dull, so I shall now make it my foremost duty to create the most lifeless & boring posts you have ever seen.* You have been warned.








*When it suits me.







Don't bother. I am welded to a strapping Scotsman.

Recent front page messages:


none

Best answers to questions:

» School Sports Day

The dreaded cross country run.
This was a complete joke. All the (sensible) people walked the course or made half-hearted attempts to run when the teachers were looking. Only a favoured few actually ever bothered to try & make a good time. Alistair however, had other ideas.

Alistair lived on the route of the run & had taken the time to pop into his house & fetch his moped. Much 2-stroke hilarity ensued for the duration (the teachers & athletic sorts having finished ages ago) with Ali zipping up & down the line of stragglers shouting encouragement. Unfortunately he was spotted concealing the moped in a hedge just before the finish line & was suspended. How we wheezed!

Oh, & I believe that my friends & I managed to have our periods every week for the whole of the 5th Year.

Laugh? We nearly bled to death.
(Thu 30th Mar 2006, 20:55, More)

» Accidentally Erotic

I'm sorry, but my optician is very sexy
despite being 20 years my senior. He's Martini handsome and wears a delicious aftershave. He gets so close to my face - I could just tilt my head up & kiss him! It's such exquisite torture.
*rubs nipples*
(Thu 2nd Feb 2006, 18:54, More)

» Heckles

I once went to the cinema with some friends
to watch Terminator 2. At that time there was an advert playing which featured MC Hammer (I think it was for Pepsi cola or something). One line started off "Hey Hammer!" to which an audience member replied "You're shit!"

Chortle
(Thu 6th Apr 2006, 19:46, More)

» Crappy Prizes

I won a small painted stone
for best can-can high kicks when I was ten

I was over the moon
(Thu 4th Aug 2005, 21:12, More)

» Weddings

Punts & Kilts
Free punt hire after the wedding - hurrah! Cue Mr Hidden in full dress kilt punting a group of us down the river.

Lovely.

However, we were jeered at by hecklers on the river bank, who shouted:

"You can take our punts, but you can never take our... FREEDOM!"

How we laughed (especially as "punts" is the Aberdeenshire pronunciation of "pants").
(Sat 16th Jul 2005, 23:07, More)
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