» Losing Your Virginity

I haven't lost mine yet :-(
I'm thinking of selling it on ebay.
(Sun 6th Mar 2005, 23:05, More)

» Scars with history

Surgeon's handywork
Many years ago I had to have an operation on my heart, which came with a lovely hole in it when I was born, which means I had a nice big scar running from my back, under my right arm to just under my chest. That one is quite inconspicuos. I also had a moleste scar down my chest to the top of my stomach which, with normal child growth and an expanding waist got bigger over the years.

Fast forward to 2 years ago and I needed a bit of a valve replacement in the old ticker so the (French) quack had a look at the old scar and said that after surgery they would tidy it up and make it much neater. So here I sit, scratching the bloody thing as it hasn't stopped itching since the day they cut me open, with a much longer and wider scar, with more scars either side of it (at 1cm intervals all the way down) where the staples that held it together were yanked out. Not only that but the bastards put a six inch scar at the top of my leg and I haven't had any sensation on the skin around the top of my leg since.

Bloody French, still, at least I didn't get MRSA.
(Tue 8th Feb 2005, 21:35, More)

» Lost...

Not me but female parental unit.
Driving to/from (can't remember which) Spain one year my mum, as usual, got us hopelessly lost somewhere around Paris, wasn't too bad, minimal swearing and we eventually found the right road and were back on our merry way.

Skip forward a few years and doing the same journey but with new husband driving and mum navigating we again got misplaced in said French Capital. Suddenly mum recognises a landmank and promptly pipes up.

"I remember this place, we've been lost here before." Still took us an extra hour to get out of the bleedin' area, she may have remembered where we got lost but that didn't help us find our way out.
(Mon 6th Dec 2004, 11:22, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

The results are in
After the autopsy, French police concluded that Henri Paul (Princess Diana's driver) WAS on drugs.

Turns out he used speed and then smack.
(Fri 10th Sep 2004, 21:53, More)

» Your Weirdest Teacher

They seemed almost normal at the time but here's mine:
I can't really remember any weird teachers but I remember some weird things about them. There were a few who never taught us anything, like the English teacher who was just like a film critic (Barry Norman for any Brits who remember him), he never taught us anything excpet what he thought of various books or plays/flims made from books. We also had a physics teacher who spent most of the time chatting up the girls instead of teaching anything.

We had a Latin teacher who looked like Darth Vader after his helmet came off, same skin colour and everything, although he had more hair. He also had breath that could melt a polar ice cap so we spent lessons freezing in the winter due to having the windows open.

There was an RE teacher who had a nervous breakdown as she was extremely wet and couldn't take our mocking/questioning of religions.

And lastly (these are more incidents than specific teachers) we had a geography teacher who gave a months detention to a kid in our history class after he fired a pencil at the history teacher. The history teacher gave the kid a week's detention and the geography one gave him a month to punish him in advance in case he ever thought of firing a pencil at him. I don't think the kid ever had a lesson with that teacher in his school life so it seemed a bit mean. Then there was the science teacher who gave us all 100 lines of "I will not laugh in class" after we all cracked up when someone did the loudest fart possible in a very quiet part of the lesson. She never even cracked a smile.
(Mon 14th Nov 2005, 12:32, More)