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- a member for 19 years, 3 months and 19 days
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» Road Rage
How a BMW ruined my day
Picture the scene.
After waiting three months, I finally went to to my local car dealer to pick up my shiny new sports car that I've been dreaming about for weeks. Feeling a little wobbly - something I ate perhaps - I collected the keys and went off for a nice drive. Forward 5 hours, I'm in Harrogate General suffering from acute food poisoning. Bah!
Anyway, car sits on the drive for another week until I feel well enough to drag myself out of bed. Saturday morning dawns, bit damp, but that wasn't going to stop me...
Managed to enjoy a lovely 3 hours behind the wheel before *BANG* some wanker in a BMW drives into the side of me while I'm stationary waiting to cross a main road. BASTARD!
As it happens, I was turning into a restaurant to meet my family, who come out to see what the fuss is about. By this time, I've worked out that the BMW driver was disabled, with hand-controls and was lighting a fag at the time. He was thus unable to grab the brake and thus unable to stop. WANKER!
Realising what happened, my dad goes absolutely ballistic! He was standing at the window of the beemer yelling obscenities at the driver who, to be fair, looked absolutely terrified. When the police turned up and asked the BMW driver if he would like to get out of his car, he took one look at my dad and politely declined. And there he sat...
...for 4 hours...
...until eventually, a recover truck turned up and the BMW was lifted, driver, passenger and all, onto the back and driven off into the distance with my entire family laughing and pointing as they went. Ha!
Oh well, good news in the end 'cos I got a packet out of the insurance :-)
Longer winded, with pics here:
www.s2ki.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=158105
Length, girth. Ah, fcuk 'em.
(Mon 16th Oct 2006, 8:50, More)
How a BMW ruined my day
Picture the scene.
After waiting three months, I finally went to to my local car dealer to pick up my shiny new sports car that I've been dreaming about for weeks. Feeling a little wobbly - something I ate perhaps - I collected the keys and went off for a nice drive. Forward 5 hours, I'm in Harrogate General suffering from acute food poisoning. Bah!
Anyway, car sits on the drive for another week until I feel well enough to drag myself out of bed. Saturday morning dawns, bit damp, but that wasn't going to stop me...
Managed to enjoy a lovely 3 hours behind the wheel before *BANG* some wanker in a BMW drives into the side of me while I'm stationary waiting to cross a main road. BASTARD!
As it happens, I was turning into a restaurant to meet my family, who come out to see what the fuss is about. By this time, I've worked out that the BMW driver was disabled, with hand-controls and was lighting a fag at the time. He was thus unable to grab the brake and thus unable to stop. WANKER!
Realising what happened, my dad goes absolutely ballistic! He was standing at the window of the beemer yelling obscenities at the driver who, to be fair, looked absolutely terrified. When the police turned up and asked the BMW driver if he would like to get out of his car, he took one look at my dad and politely declined. And there he sat...
...for 4 hours...
...until eventually, a recover truck turned up and the BMW was lifted, driver, passenger and all, onto the back and driven off into the distance with my entire family laughing and pointing as they went. Ha!
Oh well, good news in the end 'cos I got a packet out of the insurance :-)
Longer winded, with pics here:
www.s2ki.com/forums/index.php?showtopic=158105
Length, girth. Ah, fcuk 'em.
(Mon 16th Oct 2006, 8:50, More)
» Toilets
When I was a kid in the Boy Sprouts...
...we went on camp in the Trossachs (in the wilds of Scotland). I was put on toilet emptying duty, which I later learnt involved digging a pit for people to piss in and emptying the chemical toilet when it got full.
The problem is that it had been a really dry summer and the ground was way too hard for us to be bothered digging a propper crap-pit using woggles and flags, so we tried emptying the chemical bucket in the river, downstream of the camp. Unfortunately, the river had a backcurrent, so half an hour later, the turds and toilet paper drifted back past the camp where the rest of the kids were swimming. Nice.
Next bucketful, we decided to take to Aberfoyle and get rid of it there. The idea was that we'd trickle a bit at a time into the public toilets, flushing in-between until all was gone. Such a nice idea...
Quick check to make sure noone was around, sneaked the bucket into the toilets and gently slide one "portion" into the bowl...*SPLASH*...the whole lot slid in, filling the bowl absolutely to the brim with 3 days' worth of scout poo. We legged it.
Still, better than the previous year when someone emptying the shit bucket accidentally dropped it in the middle of the activities field...and there it remained all week, flies and all.
Classy.
(Mon 5th Sep 2005, 8:35, More)
When I was a kid in the Boy Sprouts...
...we went on camp in the Trossachs (in the wilds of Scotland). I was put on toilet emptying duty, which I later learnt involved digging a pit for people to piss in and emptying the chemical toilet when it got full.
The problem is that it had been a really dry summer and the ground was way too hard for us to be bothered digging a propper crap-pit using woggles and flags, so we tried emptying the chemical bucket in the river, downstream of the camp. Unfortunately, the river had a backcurrent, so half an hour later, the turds and toilet paper drifted back past the camp where the rest of the kids were swimming. Nice.
Next bucketful, we decided to take to Aberfoyle and get rid of it there. The idea was that we'd trickle a bit at a time into the public toilets, flushing in-between until all was gone. Such a nice idea...
Quick check to make sure noone was around, sneaked the bucket into the toilets and gently slide one "portion" into the bowl...*SPLASH*...the whole lot slid in, filling the bowl absolutely to the brim with 3 days' worth of scout poo. We legged it.
Still, better than the previous year when someone emptying the shit bucket accidentally dropped it in the middle of the activities field...and there it remained all week, flies and all.
Classy.
(Mon 5th Sep 2005, 8:35, More)
» The Onosecond
There was this "other" admin...
...who was demonstrating to us how great his new UPS was...
"Look, it's great. I can kill the main power circuit and everything keeps working. See."
(cue lights going off, sounds of fans and disks spinning down, closely followed by frantic knocking at the machine room door)
Unfortunately, we have *two* power circuits in out machine room and the power switches are very close together... ;-)
(not strictly a text/email, but surely an onosecond)
(Thu 26th May 2005, 18:25, More)
There was this "other" admin...
...who was demonstrating to us how great his new UPS was...
"Look, it's great. I can kill the main power circuit and everything keeps working. See."
(cue lights going off, sounds of fans and disks spinning down, closely followed by frantic knocking at the machine room door)
Unfortunately, we have *two* power circuits in out machine room and the power switches are very close together... ;-)
(not strictly a text/email, but surely an onosecond)
(Thu 26th May 2005, 18:25, More)
» Oldies vs Computers
In response to Mr Ashley...
...who laughed at a user who wanted to migrate a 5 year old SCSI image to a brand new IDE-based PC:
Careful. What they said can indeed be done, assuming that the user is running Windows XP. You have to use sysprep to seal the image, with the appropriate command-line switches to tell Windows to rebuild the storage HAL, thus making a SCSI image work on IDE. It's not guaranteed to work - in fact, it quite often fails - but I'd be a little more circumspect before abusing the older chap.
You mention that he's older than you, but are you yourself also an oldie...? I think I'd need to see you walk up a high street without stopping outside ever single shop before I'd be convinced.
Length, off-topic? Gah, who cares.
(Wed 27th Sep 2006, 13:23, More)
In response to Mr Ashley...
...who laughed at a user who wanted to migrate a 5 year old SCSI image to a brand new IDE-based PC:
Careful. What they said can indeed be done, assuming that the user is running Windows XP. You have to use sysprep to seal the image, with the appropriate command-line switches to tell Windows to rebuild the storage HAL, thus making a SCSI image work on IDE. It's not guaranteed to work - in fact, it quite often fails - but I'd be a little more circumspect before abusing the older chap.
You mention that he's older than you, but are you yourself also an oldie...? I think I'd need to see you walk up a high street without stopping outside ever single shop before I'd be convinced.
Length, off-topic? Gah, who cares.
(Wed 27th Sep 2006, 13:23, More)