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Profile for 13thfloor:
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» Call Centres

B3TA got me fired!
Some years ago, I worked for a cable company who shall remain nameless (Telewest). My manager was an excellent bloke with a cracking sense of humour, so we used to shoot the shit all day bantering through the email system. One day, I was marched into the dept. head's office, where she, quivering with rage, confronted me with a stack of email printouts covering the last 6 months shenanigans (thank fuck that's all it was). The straw that broke the camel's back, was a newsletter link to a disabled glamour models site - I was marched from the building, Never To Be Spoken Of Again, for emailing spackerporn to my boss. Thanks, B3TA!

(Honourable mention should also go to the phrase 'Cunty McFuckbucket and His Bastard Bagpipers', which she said was 'the most offensive thing' she'd ever heard. I didn't have the balls to tell her that I'd received a prize from company funds for 'Most Creative Swearing Of The Day'.)
(Fri 4th Sep 2009, 17:17, More)

» My computer gave away my secrets

ALWAYS delete your inbox...
Me & my immediate boss email each other back & forth all day, thinking of new & improved obscenities. Our head of dept pulled us both in the other day & laid out every last email we've sent for the last month. Including one which said: cunty mcfuck and his bastard bagpipers, Which actually won me a prize for best swear of the week. However, I also forwarded him the Spakkerporn link from last weeks newsletter, which is probably gonna get us both fired. Which is, I believe, ALL YOUR FAULT! You fuckers! I hope you're all gonna chip in to feed our kids...
(Sun 12th Feb 2006, 1:28, More)

» DIY Techno-hacks

Low-Tech
I tied all the remotes to the table-leg with string, does that count? It's fucking brilliant, you should all do it.
(Fri 21st Aug 2009, 17:05, More)

» Top Tips

Lazy?
If you stack your dishes in the sink upside down, then they don't collect water - meaning you can ignore the washing up for longer before it starts to smell...
(Fri 1st May 2009, 20:51, More)

» Top Tips

Vegetable water on your plants
re this week's newsletter Top Tip:"If you boil vegetables, let the water cool and
use it to water plants."
If you value your sanity, and don't want your house to smell like rotting broccoli, DO NOT DO THIS! Seriously, veg water and soil in an enclosed space is hideous. Use the cold tea from the teapot instead, plants love it.
(Fri 20th Mar 2009, 20:51, More)
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