Profile for McFlooble:
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- a member for 19 years, 0 months and 30 days
- has posted 17 messages on the main board
- has posted 0 messages on the talk board
- has posted 21 messages on the links board
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- has posted 17 stories and 0 replies on question of the week
- They liked 126 pictures, 131 links, 0 talk posts, and 331 qotw answers.
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» Oldies vs Computers
Turning tables on IT experts
I have no IT qualifications whatsoever but I managed to confound a former network administrator and a cretin on my work's IT helpdesk a with a simple bit of trickery.
When said ex-network administrator got up from his desk, I pressed "Ctrl" + "Print Screen" on his PC and pasted the resulting image of his desktop into a Paint file. I set the picture to be the desktop background, hid the toolbar and deleted all the shortcuts from the desktop.
When he got back to his desk, the desktop looked exactly the way he left it. Cue lots of rebooting and calls to the helpdesk ("None of my shortcuts work . . . the screen's frozen . . . I can start any programs").
Eventually I put them out of their misery, because, despite their combined experience and numerous qualifications, the fuckwits were no nearer working out what was wrong.
(Sun 24th Sep 2006, 19:32, More)
Turning tables on IT experts
I have no IT qualifications whatsoever but I managed to confound a former network administrator and a cretin on my work's IT helpdesk a with a simple bit of trickery.
When said ex-network administrator got up from his desk, I pressed "Ctrl" + "Print Screen" on his PC and pasted the resulting image of his desktop into a Paint file. I set the picture to be the desktop background, hid the toolbar and deleted all the shortcuts from the desktop.
When he got back to his desk, the desktop looked exactly the way he left it. Cue lots of rebooting and calls to the helpdesk ("None of my shortcuts work . . . the screen's frozen . . . I can start any programs").
Eventually I put them out of their misery, because, despite their combined experience and numerous qualifications, the fuckwits were no nearer working out what was wrong.
(Sun 24th Sep 2006, 19:32, More)
» How I Skive Off Work
Old biddies
I used to be a doctor. When I couldn't be bothered diagnosing the annoying old biddies that came to my surgery, I simply administered them excessive doses of diamorphine. I was doing this for decades until some meddling crematorium worker got suspicious.
I'm dead now. That's the biggest skive of all.
(Thu 28th Apr 2005, 22:17, More)
Old biddies
I used to be a doctor. When I couldn't be bothered diagnosing the annoying old biddies that came to my surgery, I simply administered them excessive doses of diamorphine. I was doing this for decades until some meddling crematorium worker got suspicious.
I'm dead now. That's the biggest skive of all.
(Thu 28th Apr 2005, 22:17, More)
» I just don't get it
When in conversations
people repeat almost verbatim a point they made a couple of minutes earlier, even though it bears no relation to where the conversation has moved onto. It indicates that they weren't listening to what you just said and are repeating the point just because they don't think it got the recognition it deserved, or you didn't understand it or something. It's rude and boring.
(Sat 2nd Apr 2005, 21:47, More)
When in conversations
people repeat almost verbatim a point they made a couple of minutes earlier, even though it bears no relation to where the conversation has moved onto. It indicates that they weren't listening to what you just said and are repeating the point just because they don't think it got the recognition it deserved, or you didn't understand it or something. It's rude and boring.
(Sat 2nd Apr 2005, 21:47, More)
» Guilty Pleasures
Masturbating at work
Not that I feel guilty about the masturbating at work in itself. Hell, I'm sure everyone does that. I feel guilty for fantasising about my middle-aged colleagues (45 years +) who, for some reason, make me feel so horny. They all wonder why a young, handsome man in his mid 20s can't find a girlfriend. Little do they know its because I am deranged pervert who wants to cum in their middle-aged mouths.
I need help.
(Thu 7th Apr 2005, 18:34, More)
Masturbating at work
Not that I feel guilty about the masturbating at work in itself. Hell, I'm sure everyone does that. I feel guilty for fantasising about my middle-aged colleagues (45 years +) who, for some reason, make me feel so horny. They all wonder why a young, handsome man in his mid 20s can't find a girlfriend. Little do they know its because I am deranged pervert who wants to cum in their middle-aged mouths.
I need help.
(Thu 7th Apr 2005, 18:34, More)
» I just don't get it
Daily Mail readers
for many reasons, but specifically today because on their internet website 52% of them think that Jamie Oliver should get a knighthood for telling kids to "eat their greens". Well done Jamie. Here have the same title that was granted to Sir Winston Churchill and Sir Edmund Hillary.
If Jamie is so worried about unhealthy obese kids, perhaps for his next trick he could persuade parents not to drive their lazy spoilt bastards to school everyday, thus clogging up the roads and polluting our environment. Maybe if they had to walk a couple a miles everyday, like I did, then they wouldn't be so obese and could eat what they want for lunch. Then maybe Tw@tface Oliver would deserve an OBE, nothing more.
(Fri 1st Apr 2005, 8:04, More)
Daily Mail readers
for many reasons, but specifically today because on their internet website 52% of them think that Jamie Oliver should get a knighthood for telling kids to "eat their greens". Well done Jamie. Here have the same title that was granted to Sir Winston Churchill and Sir Edmund Hillary.
If Jamie is so worried about unhealthy obese kids, perhaps for his next trick he could persuade parents not to drive their lazy spoilt bastards to school everyday, thus clogging up the roads and polluting our environment. Maybe if they had to walk a couple a miles everyday, like I did, then they wouldn't be so obese and could eat what they want for lunch. Then maybe Tw@tface Oliver would deserve an OBE, nothing more.
(Fri 1st Apr 2005, 8:04, More)