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Profile for branflakes:
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» Apparently I'm a sex offender

nearly a sex offender
A few years ago while i was still at school we had this fit science teacher who every lad and a few girls who would love to have there way with one lesson i was so horney and needed a wank so bad (i hadnt had 1 for a day) and fortuanly i got sent to the back of the class for been a little bastard, i dunno why but the teacher shouting at me was turning me on so i unzipped my fly to let the snake out. So there i am playing with my cock when teacher ask me a question i just stared (i was in shock) then luckly another teacher came in to talk to her giving me time to zip back up i didnt get caught but it was close if that teacher didnt come in i'll probably be getting arse rammed in showers today for been a sexual predator.
(Fri 18th Aug 2006, 12:20, More)

» Secret Santa

i have never been a secret santa
but i did buy one of my muslim mates a bacon butty and told him it was beef he found out and battered me and we are no longer mates i think hes fighting in irai god it was only bacon the fag
(Fri 15th Dec 2006, 14:12, More)

» Abusing freebies

i think the best freebie in the world
is wanking and i abuse that to much to point of blisters on my hand
(Fri 9th Nov 2007, 11:56, More)

» Going Too Far

true story because i say it is
i once seen a young boy crying i asked him what was wrong, he was lost, so i told him to follow me. I took him in the woods before rogering him and then i proceeded to murder him when it hit the news. the police questioned me so i blamed the village Asian man he went to jail i got away scot free but can not help thinking that i went to far i should of took the boy to the barn instead it was closer.
(Sat 11th Nov 2006, 21:33, More)

» Ripped Off

i sold my friend
50 cigarettes lighters for a fiver what i didn't tell him was the 50 cigarette lighters was a box of match's he wasn't to amused. however i thought it was hilarious needless to say i gave him his money back so technically he didn't get ripped off.
(Mon 19th Feb 2007, 10:54, More)
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