» Too much information

Wanking.......
There were 4 us sharing a room on a geography field trip.

This was about year 9 and the converstaion turned to wanking, how often, where you wanked etc etc

Then one of my mates pipes up do you wank while listening to your parents having sex, kinda killed the converstaion.

10 years later when ever he acts like a twat we always remind him of that conversation.
(Thu 6th Sep 2007, 10:47, More)

» Shoplifting

When i was...

...12 or 13 I used to love going to get my haircut.

Mainly because my barber used to buy copies of The Daily Sport, and they didn't care if minors read it.

When the barbers were distracted and I was sure that no one was looking I would pull a page out and stuff it in my pockets. On a good day I could some times get 5/6 pages without looking suspicious.

After I got my haircut, I would eagerly get home and wank my self stupid. Good times good times.
(Thu 10th Jan 2008, 11:47, More)

» I Drank Meths (pointless teenage things you did to shock)

?
I tired to convince my mum i was gay, for no apparent reason.

She just laughed in my face.
(Fri 20th Jul 2007, 14:08, More)

» Desperate Times

Not another teenage wanking story. Sigh......


I once wanked off to the instructions from a packet of Tampax, found in the cuboard of my bathroom.

For some reason I distinctly remember the FAQ. Can a tampon get lost inside me?

I have a shit imagination.:(
(Fri 16th Nov 2007, 11:10, More)

» Dumb things you've done

When i was in year 2 i was stupid enough to fall for "smell the cheese"
For those of you who are unawares of what smell the cheese is, I will try my best to explain. (Bear with me this will not be a literacy master piece)

Smell the cheese is a game where you try to punch someone in the face under the pretense of “smelling the cheese”.

To play all you need is two arms with hands, and a person of less than average intelligence.

Open your left hand so your palm is facing upwards. This will form a “plate” for your cheese.

Now with your right hand form a fist and rest it on your left palm. If done correctly your hands should sort of resemble a wedge of cheese on a plate albeit a very crap block of cheese.

Now that you have assembled your cheese and plate power combo, it’s time to find a person of less than average intelligence.

Approach the said person and offer them the chance to smell the cheese. “Smell the cheese?!”

If they agree (chortle) raise the “plate of chesse” so they can lean in and smell it. As soon as there within point blank range or critical striking distance. Quickly extend your right arm and punch them in the face. Bonus points if you get them on the nose.

If you managed to KO your victim you can proceede to take there belongings and have your way with them if you feel like it.

As mentioned previously I fell for this charming Childs game in year 2. I didn’t have my stuff nicked nor was I raped. Although the aggressor did hit me square on the nose, it bloody hurt and I proceeded to sneeze for 5 minutes.

Edit, spelling and grammar...
(Thu 3rd Jan 2008, 11:34, More)