» Helicopter Parents

Carpe Diem
Daddy's little girl could never mark her body with something of such permanency, especially not a tattoo. Peircings could be dealt taken out. Knowledge of your 17 year old having sex can be ignored... But the one thing I knew would cause carnage in the family would be branding myself with a tattoo.

Dad already having a bodge job tattoo, his name on his arm with a heart resembling more of a carrot should have put me off... but it didn't.

Since the age of 15 I was inisisting to my parents that their trypanophobic daughter was going to have a tattoo on her 18th birthday, on her wrist. Which obviously led to many discussions about placement and disobeying them.

Blanketed from the terrors of alcohol and drugs this tattoo would be the first rebellious thing I had done.

So on my 18th birthday I get my tattoo, Carpe Diem, Seize the day. Told my Mum, but hid from my overprotective dad (the same dad that didn't realise I'd streched my ears to 10mm for a year). So my parents go out to the pub talking to their friends about tattoos, as I've been told, the conversation went a little like this...

friend1: I have a new tattoo
parents: oooo very nice
Dad: MissFlee wanted a tattoo but I managed to talk her out of it *smug*
Mum: Erm. About that PapaFlee... she got it done on her birthday (some three months earlier)

Was quickly ignored for a week, then congratulated on finally breaking free of their reins. I've never looked back since!!
(Mon 14th Sep 2009, 22:01, More)

» School Projects

Bounce Bounce
Being a wee little nipper the simple things could amuse me. Now I see that the QOTW is full of inspiring stories of twelve year olds producing degree standard work... oh not me. No, not me at all.

You see every Friday at primary school was assembly. Reception to year 6 would file into the school hall accompanied by teachers with 'Holst' playing on the CD player (an attempt to calm us down) the usual school news would be read out, a fable would be told; usually stemming around the moral 'thou shalt not steal' etc etc (rough comprehensive I tell you).

Anyways getting back to the point, whilst all of you guys were doing projects I spent 3 of my primary years creating my masterpiece. An elastic band ball*. The size of a football no lie. In assembly I would show the school who saw the progression from a tennis ball size to the enormous thing it ended up being.

I left it in the head office for a few days until my dad could carry it home (my small girly frame couldn't manage it)... and some bastard stole it. Probably a blessing in disguise - I concentrated on my schoolwork more.

*dad was a postman, explains the abundance of elastic bands.
(Tue 18th Aug 2009, 16:45, More)

» DIY Techno-hacks

Ooops
Post about toast reminded me of my unfortunate encounter with the toaster. Picture the scene, twelve year old girl putting some fruit toast into the toaster... Only for one slice to break in half and wedge itself at the bottom. Cue said girl sticking a metal fork into the toaster only to have her arm thrown from her body and the fork narrowly missing the dog.

Now, of course I promise that it wasnt me
.
(Fri 21st Aug 2009, 17:10, More)

» Mobile phone disasters

sex text
duck my aunt...
which has led to a whole load of obcenities being added to the phones dictionary =]


length? A lot shorter than it was before he received the text me thinks!
(Wed 5th Aug 2009, 10:17, More)

» Family Feuds

The eventual Inlaw
MrFlee still lives at home with his mum, my parents are great... but his.. well! His mum regularly...
1) Cleans his room
2) Opens his post
3) Reads personal letters
4) Forces him to go to the Doctors
5) Screams about his spending
6) Has a breakdown when dinners not on the table for when she's home.
7) Wakes him up to make HER a cup of tea.
8) Won't let him eat KFC, chicken off the bone, unwashed potatoes etc
9) Makes him go to the shop for her because she's far too lazy
10) Has no appriciation for everything he does for her...

& his dads Irish, but lovely.
This isn't a family feud yet... but trust me, when sprogFlee's come along.. It really will be.
We're moving away Or I am.

length? Well the list could have been much much longer
(Mon 16th Nov 2009, 19:27, More)