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Welcome to my profile.

I'm 8 b3tayears old

Here are the continuing adventures of A Vagabond PI in 'A B3ta Life'

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V

Referenced so far (In order of appearance):

I.1: Happy Toast
I.2: A Vagabond
I.2: Maiden
I.4: Whato Jeeves
I.4: Progidy69 (first appearance II.2)
II.3: Wicca'd Witch (first appearance V.5)
II.4: Dixon Bawls
III.2: Riverghost
III.2: lazygamer
III.2: The Fiend
III.2: Fresh Water Mole
III.2: herman:D
III.3: Bela Legosi's Dad
III.4: Prof Undercover
III.4: Tribs
III.4: Dave!
III.5: The Great Architect
IV.2: The Magic of Chutney
IV.2: Sepang
IV.2: Captain Hood-Butter
IV.2: Mushroom
IV.3: Barryheadwound
IV.4: Ninj
V.1: Count Vanderhoff
V.3: DrZaarlon
V.3: Sunshine Elephant
V.3: Curis
V.3: Wasp Box
V.4: Kixos
V.4: Cenaris

A pome for me by GrrrMachine:

"I slurp and I munch, feast and devour
I chew and I gorge every minute, each hour.
but there's one thing that I've ne'er tried to gobble
The dry witticisms of /talk's dear chenobble"

I have a website! It's still a work-in-progress at the moment - here

Recent front page messages:

Just a quick reminder

(Sat 30th Nov 2002, 20:53, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Accidental animal cruelty

Not exactly animal cruelty, nor exactly accidental...
But I am minded of a story that happened a few years ago.

My friend and I are walking through the streets of Bournemouth in the early hours of the morning.
It had been a good night and we were both slightly drunk.
On cutting down a sidestreet on the way home we notice a cat lying on it's side on the pavement. Despite no obvious injuries it was clear the poor tabby had skipped away to kitty heaven - a sombre sight indeed.
After a quick nudge of the foot to confirm it's lifelessness we continue on our way.

At which point I start giggling to myself.

"What is it?" Asks Conor, knowing I'm not given to spontaneous chuckling.
"Wouldn't it be evil," I confide "To nudge the cat's body under the wheel of that big SUV parked next to it. When the car owner wakes up in the morning he probably won't spot it because the edge of the pavement will hide it. But he'll notice when he runs it over! Imagine if the cat belongs to the family next door - we could start a feud!"

I shake my head at the ingenious darkness of the thought and carry on walking. Then I notice Conor is no longer beside me.

He's back down the street, carefully nudging the cat's body under the wheel of the SUV.
(Thu 6th Dec 2007, 14:17, More)

» I don't understand the attraction

The desire to be a blonde.
I just can't see why a beautiful brunette or redhead would ever want to do that to their lovely locks.
(Thu 15th Oct 2009, 15:43, More)

» Common

People who do, buy or say anything at all
that's in any way different to the way that I do it, or my parents did it when I was growing up.

Especially if said thing is cheaper than the thing we do, buy or say.
(Thu 16th Oct 2008, 17:37, More)

» Cringe!

Aged 4 I was getting changed for PE
however, in my usual daydreaming state I failed to pay attention to what I was doing and thus joined the queue for the playground wearing just a vest.

It's one of my earliest memories and one that still caused me acute embarrassment into my teens.
(Thu 27th Nov 2008, 19:41, More)

» I don't understand the attraction

Curb your enthusiasm
Obnoxious old guy makes fool of himself, tries to cover it up, makes more of a fool of himself.

Repeat ad nauseum, without any actual humour being involved.
(Thu 15th Oct 2009, 15:32, More)
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