» Crappy relationships

Tore my heart out & showed me, Mola Ram style.
1st time poster,long-time lurker so be gentle - unlike the whorebag to be mentioned.
I was young, naive & overlooked OCD (3hrs to choose a shade of red paint? No, that's normal darling...isn't it?) and haughty disdain because she was way above my usual gfs/random shags. And no, alarms didn't ring at why such an attractive woman would be single.
A lot.
Shall I mention spending weekends at hers (still living at home at this point, early twenties), arriving on a Friday evening and being told Saturday afternoon I had to leave as "I was in the way and you stop me doing stuff I need to do because you're so fucking slow at walking and just want to hang out all day".

Er..I thought that's what couples did? Aaaaanyways...I got screamed at for not spending the weekend at her flat looking after her new kitten when I was supposed to be recording with my band (was ok for her to go out with her mates though). Was ordered home Saturday afternoons as mention, until she started acting lessons across London and needed somebody to ferry her to and fro. Suddenly I'm allowed to stay the whole weekend. Or drive her up to Manchester so she could buy a motorbike.

It slowly dragged on for about 18months with me unable to see I was a weak-willed doormat of a chap and she was a domineering uncaring witchfuck. The clincher?
A friend she used to work with that she had never spoken of before invited her to Washington DC for the weekend to see his new place that came with his new job.
I wasn't invited at all, "because you couldn't afford the flight" apparently. Steaming angry at myself for putting up with this treatment, I agreed to pick her up when she got back.
Except she wasn't on the return flight. Came back 3 days later and told me I had no right to be upset as "nothing happened anyway".

Huge row, I was starting to finally stand up for myself and she was shocked I had actually got upset at last.
And 3 days later was her work xmas party.
I got to look after her kitten as she went off and got drunk and stayed in a hotel. Phone rings at 4am, and it's her sister in another country far,far away asking to speak to her.
Turned out her dad had died a few hours before and the task of telling her fell to me. But I didn't know where she was staying, she didnt think it mattered that I knew because it was her work party and no I wasn't invited as I "wouldn't enjoy it".

And now the hard part - I tracked her down and had to drive out to the hotel (near the seaside) to break the news her father had died during the night. Her boss tells me the room number (he knows as I spoke to him to get directions) and I head up, knocking on the door thinking how-the-fuck-do-I-tell-her?
Door opens...can you guess?...and bloke blinking hungover at me says sure she's there but sleeping, can I come back later?
18months of being ordered around, cheated on and emotionally assfucked came spilling out, all mixed in with self loathing at putting up with her shit.
"Ok mate" I say, shaking with adrenalin,"Tell her...ah...her sister rang, her dad died last night. And tell her she's a fucking bully and I should have grown a pair of balls ages ago. She needs to get to the airport as soon as possible, it's not my fucking problem anymore."
Bloke was dumbstruck, I exhaled like a freediver surfacing after 4mins and walked away.

Does it make me a bad person for not giving a fuck if she was ok? I know I was a pussy for putting up with many,many instances of being trodden on. Like I said, I was young (an old bastard of 38 now) and stupid, blinded by norks etc etc.
Never spoke to her again after leaving that hotel and genuinely don't give a flying toss if she was ok.

Apols for length of 1st post and lack of funnies.
Have had many shit relationships since, some good ones and am now quite cheerfully ensconded with Missus & Mini Blast.
And if *you* read this, I know it's been over 15yrs and a lot of water has passed.
I still hope you cried yourself dry on the plane over to bury your dad, you horrible horrible harpy.
(Tue 26th Oct 2010, 14:37, More)