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This is a question Bad Ideas

"Let's get all the fireworks and pile dog shit on top of them". I can't believe I actually said that, and I still can't believe I was the one who lit them and couldn't run away in time. Tell us about your spectacularly misjudged ideas.

Suggested by Pig Bodine

(, Thu 24 Jul 2014, 13:15)
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Slate in the barbeque
In theory, bricks can act as a heat sink, and help keep the barbie hot.

In practice, when placed in the hot barbeque by drunk engineers and an ex-squadie, scavenged slabs of slate may - being flakey sedimentary stone, and lying exposed on the wet earth, and thus filled with pockets tiny of water trapped in between the layers - explode, sending sharp flakes of slate and burning charcoal all over the patio of the posh rented cottage.

We retreated to the kitchen and waited for it all to cook off.
Our veteran mate said it was like chucking ammo in the campfire, only less predictable.
(, Sun 27 Jul 2014, 18:14, 8 replies)
I have a small scar
on my right arse cheek because of having the very same stupid fucking idea, thought it'd make a 'boss grill for some steak!'. A fragment improbably zoomed over my head, and arced down the crack of my jeans, making me hop about like a cunt going AAAAAAAAAGH.

Making the most of it, the scar is shaped kinda like Australia, so there is that, I guess.
(, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 1:25, closed)
Arsemirror or backselfie?

(, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 9:21, closed)
You're so fat, you exert a noticeable gravitational pull on nearby objects?

(, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 10:18, closed)
I'm glad it wasn't just me.

(, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 19:35, closed)
I know friends
who lit up a barbie on a paving slab hoisted onto a bench. At the end of the barbeque and not a moment before, the slab blew up.
(, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 21:52, closed)
Seem to have vague recollections of some very drunken BBQ in Lyme Regis where some twat decided that flint stones would make a really good bonfire surround, so as to keep the fire contained.
It looked liked the final scene in 'flight of the intruder' over Hanoi.
(, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 0:14, closed)
This reminded me of a similar incident with chestnuts
I did not know they need to be punctured. When the oven heated they began to explode sounding like gunshots. There was no way to stop it suddenly once it began. All I could do is turn off the oven and wait for the gun blasts to stop hoping none of the neighbors would call the police.

I told this to my housekeeper who cleaned out the oven. She said her 14 year old son then wanted to roast chestnuts.
(, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:17, closed)
White asbestos roof panels
Are also rather good for shrapnel/bad if|when you get hit.
(, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 21:33, closed)

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