Slate in the barbeque
In theory, bricks can act as a heat sink, and help keep the barbie hot.

In practice, when placed in the hot barbeque by drunk engineers and an ex-squadie, scavenged slabs of slate may - being flakey sedimentary stone, and lying exposed on the wet earth, and thus filled with pockets tiny of water trapped in between the layers - explode, sending sharp flakes of slate and burning charcoal all over the patio of the posh rented cottage.

We retreated to the kitchen and waited for it all to cook off.
Our veteran mate said it was like chucking ammo in the campfire, only less predictable.
( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Sun 27 Jul 2014, 18:14, 8 replies)

I have a small scar
on my right arse cheek because of having the very same stupid fucking idea, thought it'd make a 'boss grill for some steak!'. A fragment improbably zoomed over my head, and arced down the crack of my jeans, making me hop about like a cunt going AAAAAAAAAGH.

Making the most of it, the scar is shaped kinda like Australia, so there is that, I guess.
(yeswehavenopasties, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 1:25, closed)

Arsemirror or backselfie?

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Jul 2014, 9:21, closed)

You're so fat, you exert a noticeable gravitational pull on nearby objects?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 10:18, closed)

I'm glad it wasn't just me.

( Invisible Wizard - 10th Level Nerf-herder, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 19:35, closed)

I know friends
who lit up a barbie on a paving slab hoisted onto a bench. At the end of the barbeque and not a moment before, the slab blew up.
(luckylife , 0 guests and 3 bots are online, Mon 28 Jul 2014, 21:52, closed)

Hmmm
Seem to have vague recollections of some very drunken BBQ in Lyme Regis where some twat decided that flint stones would make a really good bonfire surround, so as to keep the fire contained.
It looked liked the final scene in 'flight of the intruder' over Hanoi.
(Master_Slob UK minister for cultural appropriation., Tue 29 Jul 2014, 0:14, closed)

This reminded me of a similar incident with chestnuts
I did not know they need to be punctured. When the oven heated they began to explode sounding like gunshots. There was no way to stop it suddenly once it began. All I could do is turn off the oven and wait for the gun blasts to stop hoping none of the neighbors would call the police.

I told this to my housekeeper who cleaned out the oven. She said her 14 year old son then wanted to roast chestnuts.
( kombu dashi, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 16:17, closed)

White asbestos roof panels
Are also rather good for shrapnel/bad if|when you get hit.
( moonbadger Doesn't judge a fish by its ability to climb trees, Tue 29 Jul 2014, 21:33, closed)