"Reincarnation"
I put the 'me' in Ameoba,
I ruled the primordial soup,
I was the first ever zygote,
and made little creatures from gloop.

I was the king of the dino's,
greater than any t-rex,
I saw the start of the stone age,
and Adam and Eve having sex.

I was the hairiest cave man,
with the largest of all overbites,
that and a big club's what made me,
the king of the old troglodytes.

I lit up all the dark ages,
the history that noone could see,
the darkest of all mankinds pages,
we only had candles y'see.

I was King Henrys food taster,
from chicken to large artichokes.
I dabbled with one of his ladies,
and he cut off my bonce with a stroke.

I led the French Revolution,
And stormed at the Bastilles great gates,
I didn't know then my solution,
Would end up as a new-fascist state.

I was Will Shakespeares ghost writer,
and penned all the best of his work,
Infact all the stuff that he's written,
is the kind Barbera Cartland would shirk.

I popped a cap in Duke Ferdinand,
and created the worlds first drive by,
I charged the guns at the battle of somme,
and shot at the whites of their eyes.

I designed Hitlers square moustache,
to make him look totally gay,
I brought an end to the nazi's,
and shagged Eva Braun on the way.

I was the man who killed Kennedy,
as I shot from the old grassy knoll,
I got lots of cash from the mafia,
and a shag off a nice gangsters moll.

I came all over Lewinski,
and ruined her nice summer dress,
but who would have thought that my jism,
would cause Mr Clinton such stress?,

I was behind 9-11,
it's reasons were far from insane,
Bush told us to kill all the muslims,
despite his complete lack of a brain.

So after all this I'm quite knackered,
I've been busy I'm sure you'll agree,
so next time I'm reincarnated,
I want to come back as a tree...

Mikee, aged 30 & 1/3rd
( TooMuch2AM, Thu 24 Feb 2005, 21:45, Reply)