I joined a club to help me keep focused
I was doing
(ParaSitius is an Optimistic Pessimist, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 14:18, Reply)

I used to be
In a club where we wore these nifty white sheets and so did a mean ghost impression.
I left because I didn't like wasting wood.
(Shamelesspendant Better dead then smeg., Tue 26 Jun 2012, 13:38, 2 replies)

Premature Ejaculators Society
I joined, went to one meeting - but I came too early....
(Maclir, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 13:07, 3 replies)

Young Conservatives Club
A few years back I attended an awards bash just off of Whitehall.

After the ceremony I popped to a local pub with a few work colleagues.

I was standing at the bar when a young-ish lad said “hello” to me in the plumb-est and squeakiest voice, followed by “So, which way do you swing”?

I was slightly taken aback and told him flatly that I was straight thank you very much.

He then informed me that he meant which party do I vote for…

My mistake, but he was still a snotty little cunt.
(Deskbound You insignificant speck of dust, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 12:17, 5 replies)

I used to be in a club for the deaf, dumb and blind
the first rule was 'You do NOT talk about...'

etc
(Quintno EXPERIMENT RUINED CANCELLED, LEFT 4EVER, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 12:15, 1 reply)

.. .- -- .- -- . -- -... . .-. --- ..-. - .... . -- --- .-. ... . -.-. --- -.. . -.-. .-.. ..- -... .-.-.-
(ParaSitius is an Optimistic Pessimist, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 12:10, 2 replies)

I was a member of the Scouts
I suffered years of sexual abuse. This would have been bad enough but I was the Scoutmaster at the time.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 9:52, 2 replies)

Ive just remembered
"The Game"
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 9:27, 5 replies)

The Rain Appreciation Club
got washed out.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 26 Jun 2012, 8:31, Reply)

The Origami Society
has folded.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 8:28, Reply)

I belong to a club of sorts
its got these very dull 12 steps I need to follow
(technocore, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 2:47, 5 replies)

Last week,
A couple of mates and I clubbed together and bought a baby seal from some Aleutians.

Then we killed it, and barbecued its organs.

Bindun?
(Tiktock Beating off flamers with a shitty stick, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 1:05, 2 replies)

Something hilarious happened
at the Procrastinators Society.

[finish this later]
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 26 Jun 2012, 0:52, Reply)

O Captain! My Captain!

( Albert Marshmallow is a completely irredeemable cunt, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 20:55, 2 replies)

Started an Apathy Soc at uni. Got the most members of any society.
because you had to sign-up if you DIDN'T want to belong. And nobody could be bothered.

Had to disband as we couldn't get any funds despite our huge membership because the man said that by going to the trouble of asking for the funds we were obviously not living up to our own principles.

So we kinda let it go after that.
(karnuvap, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 16:43, 3 replies)

I joined a gang once
a gangrape lol
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:46, 1 reply)

I am a member of the Conservative party.
I really should visit the local association some time.
I was out door knocking and leafleting in Walsall a lot in the first week of May. There arent that many middle class Tory boy stereotypes there, surprisingly. A few posh birds, but many of the people seemed to be state educated "new money".
We attained the lowest net swing in the country against the Tories and held control in an awful year in a borough we'd never previously managed to gain since the 50s.
By the way, I don't agree with 60% of what central government are doing and only joined cause everyone here knows Labour councils are total crap.They waste our money, raise our council tax to immoral highs, and the last time we had one Blair put us under special measures.
FUN FACT- Rob Manuel blocked me on Twitter for defending Louise Mensch.
Hi fellow Wulfrunian, is you're reading.
Please Mr Ginger Fuher no delete my acount here I no speaky speaky bout Lolotics 2U nomore!
(Glucose-Maximus All over the world., Mon 25 Jun 2012, 15:02, 28 replies)

when i was younger
There was a cut-through near my house. A path that ran between houses, with a small wood in the middle, about the size of a small football pitch.

One day whilst out on our bikes we happened to come across a dip in the fence in the far back of the wood. It was perfect to construct a Den!... in fact it was partially a den already.

We began gathering materials in ernest. Pieces of old door. Carboard boxes. we fashioned quite a shelter... until one day when a group of older boys turned up wanting to know what we had done to their Den... so after some name calling, and saying various things about brothers beating people up, we agreed in quite a diplomatic fashion to share the Den on different days. We had it Monday though to Wednesday they had it Thursday and Friday, we took saturday and they did Sunday.... we only went back I think once.. and I never saw the other lads ever again too. stood in a lot of dog shit though... skustin.
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:37, Reply)

The only society I'm a member of
is for people that are fans of thick coatings of a sweetened cocoa product on their cookies.
( Ungersven would support SpankyHanky's patreon, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:19, 2 replies)

Anti Cheese League
Cheese is the jism of the devil and thus I have founded the above.

Rules are: you need to really hate cheese, a lot.

Activities: go into a restaurant have a large meal, then order cheese and biscuits. When the waiter brings over the cheese board knock it out of his hand and then stamp all the cheese into the carpet shouting "DIE, DIE, YOU MOTHERFUCKING CHEESE WANK-WEASEL"
(magic the cat will someone please think of the kittens, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:01, 16 replies)

Religious Differences
I used to belong to a group. Then it became apparent that the leader was a committed Christian, and was intent on using his position to push his belief system on the members. I attempted to engage him in reasoned, rational debate, but to no avail, so reluctantly I had to leave.

It was the Cubs. I was seven.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 14:01, 2 replies)

Music club
Mrs V and I have an occassional music club. It's a bit like a book club, and is fun. The rules is this:

1. 5 tracks each, none over 7 mins.
2. Each track must be - in your estimation - a good track worthy of note - not just something that reminds you of your holiday, or when you got together with your boy/girlfriend.

And that's it. Take it in turns to play a track - and then discuss - great stuff.

Whoever's hosting provides food/nibbles, bring your own booze.

I've discovered all sorts of interesting stuff through it, from genres I'd never even considered before (my tolerance for free-form jazz, for example, is very low).
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 13:00, 8 replies)

Do you
want to??
(speedevil, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 12:30, 1 reply)

Robin Hood
I'm a member of an archery club.
We shoot once a week and I find it a great way to relax.
My other half was slightly worried at first about having a lethal weapon in the house but when he saw how long it takes me to put my bow together, he realised he'd have plenty of time to run.
(Nanny Pat vote for me, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 10:43, Reply)

I used to be a member of the Conservative Club.
Not because of the politics, but they had good snooker tables, cheap beer and it was a good opportunity to network.
I was also a member of the Homeguard Club, a men only social club, with incredibly cheap beer. There was a "no womwn allowed" rule, it's probably illegal nowadays. Women were actually allowed in on Christmas Day morning, for about 20 minutes, to watch the reffle being drawn. They then were forced to fuck off and cook dinner, whilst the menfolk got legless. Harsh, but fair.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Mon 25 Jun 2012, 9:37, 7 replies)

I've joined the Multiple Amputees Society.
I don't want to belong to any club that has members.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 7:56, 6 replies)

Probably boring, but true and on topic.
For many years I've been a member of a local professional society. Besides sharing a common occupation, we mainly use the group for networking (read job finding) and sharing the odd story. One nice feature is the corporate sponsorships of our meetings. This results in amazing swag raffles at the monthly meetings, and truly unbelievable giveaways at both the annual meeting and the summer seminar series. I've won tool sets, meters, phones, PDA's, booze, gift certificates, etc. All worth far, far more than the $25 annual dues.

If you have a job, but don't have a society, either find one or start one. Sales and marketing loves to give stuff away!
(danalan Pretty good, for an amateur., Mon 25 Jun 2012, 4:34, Reply)

I belonged to a group that had a few famous members
This one time after our meeting i went out drinking with a popular 90's singer.
The next morning i got chased by a massive group of people for "Seal clubbing"....


I'll get my coat....
(shake'n'bake Tally Ho, Biatch!, Mon 25 Jun 2012, 2:00, 1 reply)

I'm a member of a pretty exclusive club
We're the few people who aren't actually bothered about, or actively disdain, football.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Sun 24 Jun 2012, 22:44, 2 replies)