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This is a question I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Challenge: write a joke. As simple joke with a setup and a punchline.

RULES OF ENGAGEMENT - IGNORING THIS COULD RESULT IN BAN

* Don't steal jokes - write them
* Don't flood post
* Just don't be a dick ok?

So join in and write a bad joke and apologise for it.

Read Latest | Highest Voted

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Wed 8 Aug 2018, 9:00)
Pages: Latest, 43, 42, 41, 40, 39, ... 1

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I'm Sorry I've Written Some "Jokes"

(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 20:27, 102 replies, latest was 2 years ago)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist is a self-contained piece for one voice in music?
Tom Aria
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 20:28, Reply)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist is a big fan of Speedy Gonzales?
Tom ¡Arriba!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 20:30, Reply)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist likes to think of himself as being part of a master race?
Tom Aryan
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 20:33, Reply)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist is a collection of disk drives for the purposes of data redundancy?
Tom Array
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 20:35, Reply)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist can be found by knowing the length of his sides?
Tom Area
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 20:39, Reply)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist came first in the "sexiest ratite in the world" poll in For Ostriches Magazine?
Tom, a rhea
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 10:44, Reply)
Which Chilean-American metal vocalist is a character in the book A Song Of Thrones
Tom Arya
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 30 Apr 2022, 20:38, Reply)
Which Brazilian metal vocalist is the result of multiplying his length by his breadth?
Max Cavalarea
(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 21:38, Reply)
Which Brazilian metal vocalist is a dedicated King Charles supporter?
Max Cavalier
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 22:16, Reply)
Which thrash metal vocalist is descended from Spanish horses?
Dave Mustang
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 22:18, Reply)
Which screeching black metal shortarse is 20%?
Dani Fifth
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 16 Apr 2022, 22:21, Reply)
Which death metal vocalist is a great big screaming woofter?
Glen Bent 'un
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 10:35, Reply)
Which Norwegian Black Metal vocalist is dead?
Dead
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 11:39, Reply)
Which industrial rock songwriter and multi-instrumentalist is an electric car hire service?
Rent Tesla
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 11:40, Reply)
Which flamboyant rock frontman was also a breakfast cereal?
Shreddie Mercury
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 11:42, Reply)
Which country music star cobbled together a complete vehicle with parts taken from the scenes of RTAs?
Johnny Crash
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 12:30, Reply)
Which experimental rock vocalist is a yappy little dog?
Thom Yorkie
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 13:00, Reply)
Which rock band comprised four cat-faced drummers?
Criss
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 20:18, Reply)
Under what name did Albert Wesker, Chris Redfield, Barry Burton and Jill Valentine record a single-length medley of similar-tempo pop songs?
S.T.A.R.S. on 45
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 18 Apr 2022, 20:31, Reply)
What's Andrew Eldritch's favourite portmanteau Marvel character?
Vision Thing!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 19 Apr 2022, 13:30, Reply)
where does he worship his single woolen mitt?
In the 'Temple of Glove'!!!!!!
(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Tue 19 Apr 2022, 14:09, Reply)
where does he do his early morning and late night shopping?
First and last in Aldi's!!!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Wed 20 Apr 2022, 8:22, Reply)
In which street did Andrew organise a demonstration, demanding more authority be granted to the Northern Ireland Executive?
On Devolution Boulevard!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 20 Apr 2022, 8:55, Reply)
What is Andrew's favourite Stephen King sequel that nobody asked for?
Doctor Sleep!!!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Wed 20 Apr 2022, 9:17, Reply)
With which song did Level 42 win Eurovision?
Miking Your Lind Up
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 19 Apr 2022, 18:34, Reply)
On which Ricky Gervais show did a care worker sing about Layla while giving pizza to the residents?
Derek and the Domino's.
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 19 Apr 2022, 22:12, Reply)
Why are German children better pet owners than their parents?
Because they’re kinder.
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 19 Apr 2022, 22:29, Reply)
What did Paul Daniels call his house elf?
Dobbie McGee!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 14:04, Reply)
What did Paul Daniels call his spaced-out reggae remix album?
Dubbie McGee!!!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 16:04, Reply)
What did Paul Daniels use to fry his chicken for an Indian curry?
Dab o' my ghee!!!
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 16:05, Reply)
trying and failing to make 'Alan McGee' a punchline here, fml

(beepeedee Inner City Sumo, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 16:50, Reply)
He made himself the punchline when he signed One Lady Owner

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Fri 22 Apr 2022, 7:48, Reply)


(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 19:43, Reply)
Which Transformer frustrates washerwomen?
Ironhide!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 19:55, Reply)
Which Transformer is Harry Webb's favourite pullover?
Cliffjumper!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 20:35, Reply)
What do Transformers call their specially-made giant ice lollies?
Ultra Magnums!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 20:38, Reply)
Randy + Savage
maybe yours will catch on
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 21:18, Reply)
Which Wella product range do Decepticons use to style their hair?
Robots don't have hair.
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 21 Apr 2022, 22:47, Reply)
Which Decepticon Seeker would you likely encounter at a funeral?
None of them, they're too big to fit inside a church.
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 23 Apr 2022, 9:53, Reply)
Which Transformer is a thing that happens at Na'vi football matches?
Bluestreak!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 23 Apr 2022, 9:58, Reply)
Which Transformer is a song by "Legs Stewart"?
Hot Rod
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 23 Apr 2022, 11:41, Reply)
What's a Triple Changer's favourite dog breed?
A Springer Spaniel!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 24 Apr 2022, 11:20, Reply)
What's Peter Parker's favourite Autobot?
Jazz!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 24 Apr 2022, 11:23, Reply)
Which is DI Regan's favourite Dinobot?
Slag
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 24 Apr 2022, 11:32, Reply)

b3ta.com/board/11339986
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Mon 25 Apr 2022, 12:08, Reply)

b3ta.com/board/11369288
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 6 Jun 2022, 22:47, Reply)
What does Unicron say after he verifies someone's age at the front gate of Alton Towers?
Proceed, on your way to Oblivion
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 24 Apr 2022, 11:36, Reply)
Who's always inconsiderate to his fellow Headmasters?
Thoughtless Maximus
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 24 Apr 2022, 22:27, Reply)
Which Decepticon is a load of buffet cars joined together?
Gastrotrain
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 9:35, Reply)
Which Transformer shat himself?
Skids
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 12:10, Reply)
Which Decepticon keeps falling over his own tail?
Tripticon
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 13:15, Reply)
Why did no-one ever discover the Transformer hiding inside the Freddie Mercury suit?
He was a great Pretender
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 13:23, Reply)
Where do the Autobots go for breakfast eggs?
Scramble City
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 13:25, Reply)
Which Decepticon goes round assaulting Dadaist filmmakers?
Cocteau-punch
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 14:07, Reply)
Which Autobot smells of piss?
Weespray
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 14:10, Reply)
Which Triple Changer is Darude's favourite?
He doesn't like any of them
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 14:47, Reply)
What's the cannibalistic Australian Galvatron's favourite Seeker Sandwich?
Coronation Starscream?
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 18:38, Reply)
This is bad comedy

(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 18:44, Reply)
Which Autobot is always bad tempered?
Arsey
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 19:04, Reply)
Which Technobot hates cream teas?
Nosecone
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 19:07, Reply)
How do Nebulan pigs know how to behave?
They just follow the Stylor
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 21:07, Reply)
Which darts player has an A-10 Thunderbolt vehicle mode?
Phil The Powerglide
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 26 Apr 2022, 22:40, Reply)
What do you call a rubbish Transformers copy?
Dire Clone
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 0:05, Reply)
What is Stan Bush's favourite part of a rugby field?
The touch
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 10:04, Reply)
Who's the Gallagher brothers' least favourite Autobot?
Blurr
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 10:30, Reply)
Which part of the COVID-19 pandemic did Transformers enjoy the least?
The Circuit Breaker
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 10:36, Reply)
What's the name for the vast accumulated records of all Transformer mistakes ever made?
Blunderbase
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 15:27, Reply)
Which combiner is a caped hero delivering electricity all around Europe?
SuperE.ON
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 18:36, Reply)
Which Minibot carries around a bag of glue?
Huffer
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 27 Apr 2022, 23:11, Reply)
Which Combiner gradually reveals himself to be male?
Drag Strip
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 28 Apr 2022, 10:22, Reply)
Which Transformer group is good with BBC computers?
The Micromasters
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 28 Apr 2022, 13:21, Reply)
Which Minibot puts gerbils up his bum
Geres
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 28 Apr 2022, 18:23, Reply)
Which terrible horror movie has a giant body part attacking the head office of an insurance company?
MORE TH>N meets "The Eye"
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 28 Apr 2022, 22:12, Reply)
Which Minibot wants some money from you every time there's a hurricane?
Windcharger
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 28 Apr 2022, 23:32, Reply)
Which Decepticon Seeker is piloted by a sheep?
Ramjet
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 28 Apr 2022, 23:58, Reply)
What did Scourge do when his chimney was blocked?
He got the Sweeps to take a look at it
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 29 Apr 2022, 18:29, Reply)
Which computer played a mechanic in the Star Wars sequels?
Kellytran I
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 29 Apr 2022, 19:45, Reply)
Which Motown trio loved expensive watches?
The Omega Supremes
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 29 Apr 2022, 19:50, Reply)
Which Headmaster won't stop listening to Cool For Cats?
Squeezeplay
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 29 Apr 2022, 20:01, Reply)
Which Transformer can disguise himself as a Central Perk coffee cup?
Friendsy
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 29 Apr 2022, 21:43, Reply)
Which Autobot leader has four arms and four legs?
Octopus Prime
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 29 Apr 2022, 21:44, Reply)
Nok nok nok nok nok
Who's there?
BlackZarak with an erection
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 30 Apr 2022, 11:56, Reply)
How did the Decepticon Tapes hidden on the Moon get discovered?
Buzzsaw them
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 30 Apr 2022, 12:03, Reply)
Which Junkion appeared in Jurassic Park?
Crapheap
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 30 Apr 2022, 12:48, Reply)
Which Minibot did Mr Micawber work for?
'Umblebee
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 30 Apr 2022, 19:44, Reply)
Which cyborg bounty hunter stands in your garden?
Death'shed
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sat 30 Apr 2022, 21:44, Reply)
Which Seeker is obsessed with Y-fronts?
Undercracker
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 9:38, Reply)
Which Seeker is a lion watching Netflix?
Scarstream
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 10:57, Reply)
Something about the library having multiple copies of Let's Get Ready To Rhumble back in the day
Psyche loaners
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 11:08, Reply)
Which Constructicon is good on "the decks"?
Mixmaster
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 11:14, Reply)
Who has Jonathan as his head, Kevin as his body, Bill and Rolf as his legs, and Jimmy and Rowan as his arms?
Predaking
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 11:55, Reply)
Which Decepticon car has diarrhoea all the time?
Runnymuck
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 20:17, Reply)
Which Insecticon will sell you pork?
Chop Shop
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 21:51, Reply)
Which Autobot is comprised of flying sausages?
Sky Links
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 1 May 2022, 23:39, Reply)
Which Triple Changer enjoys sailing round Norfolk on the 15th of March?
Broads Ides
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 2 May 2022, 9:43, Reply)
What did the French President start calling himself after getting a higher education?
Unicron
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 3 May 2022, 10:35, Reply)
What does an Autobot Land Rover make his signature artisan bread out of while he's watching Mike Judge comedies?
Brawn Dough
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 6 Sep 2022, 23:02, Reply)
This isn't even in my top ten qotw threads

(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 24 Apr 2022, 11:24, Reply)
99 replies but a joke ain't one

(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Mon 2 May 2022, 9:44, Reply)
Which British post-punk and alternative rock record producer and audio engineer with a sideline in letter delivery will probably get your b3ta account suspended?
Flood Post
(I helped save b3ta! Turtle Power & Knuckles, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 11:50, Reply)
What was the birth name of American musician, record producer and record executive Don Was?
Don Tbeadick
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Sun 17 Apr 2022, 14:56, Reply)
What was the Yorkshire nickname of Donald Post, who created the celebrated William Shatner mask worn by Michael Myers in the Halloween films,
after he flooded his hotel room in Ilkley by leaving his taps running?

Don 't'flood' Post
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Writtern By the Winners, Tue 19 Apr 2022, 8:17, Reply)

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