TheManWithThePlan
asked why I'm so fucked off about so-called 'humorous' texting...

Quite a while back one of my best mates, a lad named Jim, was struggling with his sexuality. He was gay. No problem with that. But where we grew up it was decidedly not 'the done thing' to be homosexual. We all knew Jim was gay and really didn't care. When he eventually came out to us it was quite the anticlimax - just a brief interlude before we got in the next round of drinks. But then, after a year or so of Jim being a proud gay man, some complete and utter tit thought it would be a great joke to nick his mobile and text Jim's parents. Up to this point they didn't know he was a shirt lifter of George Michaelesque proportions.

Oh, what hilarity...

Jim's dad went apeshit. Absolutely up the fucking wall. Jim ended up being thrown out of his house. He then spent the next few weeks sleeping over at various mates houses. But Jim was spiralling into a deep dark depression. Then, one day, Jim disappeared. Not sure where he went, some people said he moved down to London, others that he'd got work as a travel rep in Spain. But no one really knew - Jim just cut himself off from everyone who cared about him.

Then, a few years back, I happened to bump into an old mate I hadn't seen for years who told me Jim had passed away pretty much penniless in a bedsit somewhere, London I think. It made me fucking angry. Really fucking angry.

And all this can be traced back to the utter fucking prick shithead who sent the texts to his dad's phone. Fucking evil shit. I swear if I ever find out who that was, I will personally rip their fucking head off and piss down the hole.

So, kids - don't send shitty texts for a ten second immature giggle - it really does fuck up lives. Sorry for lack of funnies, but this subject is a bit close to the bone. Cheers.
(Big Grant, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 13:17, 14 replies)

^this
Have a click. I'm firmly in the "funny is good, but don't be a twunt" camp.
( bluemeat has been best of all the animals since, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 13:21, closed)

^ This^ as well. *Clickage*

(Stashie is plotting against his blender on, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 13:30, closed)

Holy shit
That is tragic
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 13:37, closed)

crikey
that is terrible :(
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 13:47, closed)

Fuck
*click*

umm, fuck. that's horrible. what a complete cunt.
(Alphabet Soap boshboshboshbosh, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 13:53, closed)

What an utter cunt.
I hope whoever it was has similar acquaintances who fuck him / her over like that. Have a click.
(womanwhocanonlylivewithdogs, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 15:02, closed)

in fact...
lets all go round his/her house and brick their windows, eh?!

better yet, lets forget all about the bigoted, homophobic parent(s)!

Killin's too good for'em! String 'em up I say! Worse than Hitler!
(likeajackhammer, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 15:20, closed)

IT WAS ME.

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 15:08, closed)

Wait, isn't this technically his parents fault?

( WHARRGARBL, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 15:37, closed)

for having a queer son?
you terrible bastard!
(likeajackhammer, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 15:43, closed)

Surely it's his own fault for being a bummer?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 31 Jul 2009, 18:01, closed)

Hmm.
Firstly, The ‘prank’ was deplorable and I do not condone it in any way.

However, after considering the evidence you provide, the resulting chain of events seem overly drastic and I don't think they can be solely blamed on a single thoughtless action.

His parents would have found out about his loving of teh cock eventually; unless he was thinking of spending the rest of his life living with his folks as a closet gayer (which seems unlikely). This makes their reaction a ticking time bomb and the event that instigates the ‘forced coming out’ slightly less relevant.

As mentioned in replies above, the real issue here is his bigoted parents, but also consider your friend’s reaction. When you say he had support from people such as yourself around him, and was generally accepted by everybody other than his parents, why cut himself off from that support and flee to London? He also could have said that the text was a joke from someone else, denied all knowledge. But then again, what did he have to be so ashamed of? Maybe he was relieved that finally something had brought the issue to the surface. Yet by running away he took away any chance of a possible reconciliation once his parents had a chance to get over their initial shock (which also seems unlikely as his parents would have to be a special kind of ignorant to not have suspected something)

I know I’m summising, but was his ‘spiralling depression’ possibly rooted in the anxiety with the ‘struggle’ you said he was having with his sexuality, and less so in the manner with which he was outed to his parents. Were there other issues? Money or relationship problems?

It is a tragic tale, and as his friend I can understand you wanting the closure of being able to pin the blame of such a senseless waste on a single event. After all, whoever sent the text was a total cunt, but I don’t think that he can be made a scapegoat for what happened – at best it was a catalyst for what seems like an inevitable destiny.

That said, what happened still contravenes the basic, unwritten code of honour between blokes (which applies to gayers too), and for that alone the ‘prankster’ should be strung up by a bollock.
(The Magic Number is neither magic nor a number, Tue 4 Aug 2009, 9:56, closed)

Parents to blame?
Yes. Definately, yes. My mate's dad was a fucking prick of the highest order. But Jim should've been able to come out to them when he wanted to and not have been outed with a text to his dad, who was asleep in bed at the time, going on about loving it up the arse.

And besides whos to blame in this, there's no doubt that text started a chain reaction which completely fucked his life up.

And another besides - sending this sort of shit to your mates family and friends is about as funny as Bobby Davro in panto. Cheers.
(Big Grant, Tue 4 Aug 2009, 17:15, closed)