This is really boring if you don't understand cricket
The old man's on the committee of the local cricket club, which is just celebrating its centenary and is surrounded by houses of the red brick, turn-of-the-century, half-a-million quid type. Anyway, as happens in cricket, occasionally the wee red ball hits off the willow (fnar fnar) and hurtles out of the ground and meets the red brick or Dutch slate of one of the aforementioned houses. The vast majority of residents are aware that this is, really, a hazard of buying a house next to a cricket ground and are easily placated by free membership, a few pints in the bar and free entry to the Christmas party.

There was one bloke though, who got mightily annoyed as one six sailed out of the ground and into his window. Into the secretary's office he stormed and demanded to know "what is the club going to do about it?"

He then asked why the club couldn't protect his house/garden and put up a fence "like you have for the other houses". Rather perplexed, as there's no fence around the club, just a privet hedge and a low wall, the secretary looked blank until it slowly dawned on him that the man was referring to the sight-screens...

At village cricket matches, this story's bloody hilarious.
(suxamethonium, Sat 3 Oct 2009, 23:27, 3 replies)

*cricket applause*

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 4 Oct 2009, 18:42, closed)

Cricket, lovely cricket.
Viv Richards once played at our ground, and wafted the willow, landing the ball on an adjoining roof, cracking one of the tiles. Did the owner complain? Did he b******s. He still dines out on the story!
( The Lone Groover has mal des nuts., Sun 4 Oct 2009, 21:06, closed)

If life was fair:
The umpire would say "Raise Shields!", and a shimmery blue energy barrier would spring to life around the perimeter; safely containing any stray projectiles. But it isn't.
(The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Mon 5 Oct 2009, 0:10, closed)