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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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It's gonna be lovely this weekend.
I declare it the start of the cider season.

And to ring-a-rang-a-dong-for-a-new-thread...

If you had to go on holiday with a member of OT, who would you go with and where would you go?

Alt: What are you brilliant at?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:52, 159 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
I may get some cider this evening.
I won't actually go outside, for fear of murdering my monitor tan, but I might open the patio door.

Alt: I am brilliant with my hands. I can fix practically anything, given time and tools.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:53, Reply)
You should get some cider.
Cider is lovely.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:56, Reply)
Some Magners, yeah? Or Bulmers?
I'll have to make sure to get some ice.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:57, Reply)
Mick cider isn't cider.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:59, Reply)
Fucking ice, Jeff.
ICE
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:00, Reply)
I know Kronster.
The only thing you can add to cider to make it nicer is a slice of lemon if it's a really dry drop.

Still, I'm impressed with your training plan prior to the cider boat.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:04, Reply)
What, sitting in my living room with the patio door open, you mean?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:18, Reply)
Hell yeah.
You'll be the ace face on the cider boat with those mad skillz.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:20, Reply)
Urgh
just urgh.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:01, Reply)

They are the same thing. Not in a 'they taste the same' kind of way, in a 'they are the same product in the same way Marathon & Snickers would be the same product if they sold them side by side'
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:01, Reply)
If you can see your hand through the pint glass
it's not fucking cider.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:02, Reply)
this
so this.
*anticipates cider festival at the local pub*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:03, Reply)
Also, as has been said, 'urgh'.
And that's from someone who wasn't fussy...
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:02, Reply)
you learn something new every day.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:06, Reply)
Paydays should be brought forward in the event of a sunny weekend.
:(
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:57, Reply)
It's my payday today
I'm going to the pub tonight
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 15:59, Reply)
Hey darth, that's reminded me, there's something I've always wanted to ask,
why are you such a massive prick?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:02, Reply)
You're adorable

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:04, Reply)
I'm a poor able at the moment.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:05, Reply)
Alt: Listening
I'm a GBF to more girls than I care to count
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:02, Reply)
A Great Big Fanny?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:11, Reply)
Eh, close enough

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:16, Reply)
Hahahaha

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:06, Reply)
I've just been invited to a seminar
by Dr Joelle Fanghangel about interstices in the neoliberal weft.

I shall not be going.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:02, Reply)
Weft is now my word of the day.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:03, Reply)
But Dr Joelle might want to go for a pint after.
And you were looking for someone to go for a drink with.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:03, Reply)
It's not til next month

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:05, Reply)
Well tell the good Dr
That you'll go to the pub now and save them a seat and for them to come along when they've finished.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:12, Reply)
First line fine
Third line, fine.
Second line, buh?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:14, Reply)
My boss has fucked of to Morroco to play golf, so I'm off home right now.
Cider for me tonight, some Westons I think.

Alt: I'm the best motherfuckin electrical engineer in the world.

Laters good people of /OT.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:03, Reply)
I am good at cheekbones.
And massive vanity.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:04, Reply)
You're so lucky that no-one was about to read your last post in the previous thread
We'll file that in the Dick Van Dyke file of "brave attempts"
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:07, Reply)
brave attempts at what?
Living up to your standards?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:09, Reply)
Whoa! That's English for stop a horse
Give yourself something attainable to shoot for first kiddo
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:16, Reply)
I don't know where all the bitchiness on your part comes from.
It cuts me real deep.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:18, Reply)
It comes from ballroom dancing being so masculine

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:19, Reply)
yes of course.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:20, Reply)
Alt: Being a colossal nuisance

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:05, Reply)
Alt: cake and science.
and modesty. Obviously.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:05, Reply)
Somewhere with swipe as she has deep pockets. Maybe Aspen or Whistler.
Alt: ballet
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:06, Reply)
Maths and cynicism.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:10, Reply)
and you disapprove of me.
:'(
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:30, Reply)
How can I, I've never met you.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:31, Reply)
male vanity.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:40, Reply)
Who thinks this is worth getting?
www.the-home-brew-shop.co.uk/acatalog/Lager_Starter_kit_COOPERS_5_gallons.html
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:14, Reply)
Probably not.
It's the sort of thing I'd let someone else buy and use and only if the beer was nice would I think about buying it myself.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:21, Reply)
There's some cheaper ones,
I might give it a go soon, 40 pints for 60 quid is pretty good, even if the beer is a bit shit.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:32, Reply)
It isn't great value.
*Thinks back to when I started drinking in pubs and you could get a IPA for 89p*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:46, Reply)
Yeah, but after the first batch it's about £10 for 40 pints
most of it is reuseable.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:49, Reply)
Reuseable eh....
*Pisses in a demijohn and adds sugar*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:50, Reply)
Might go for this one.
It's without bottles though... www.balliihoo.co.uk/balliihoo-basic-homebrew-starter-kit-with-40-pint-pilsner-lager-p-17.html
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:55, Reply)
That looks like good value.
How long does it take to brew?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:56, Reply)
21 days ish
up to 28, the last 10-14 are in the bottles.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:00, Reply)
That isn't too bad.
I thought it would take months.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:02, Reply)
If medieval monks could do it jeff!
they didn't even have the internet.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:05, Reply)
You need to get some brewing tips
From Popcorn Sutton.

Athough I've just found out he's dead, so scrub that idea.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marvin_Sutton
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:07, Reply)
My brother has just started making his own wine.
He claims to be making a barrel of Barolo. This idea is laughable - it's bound to be fucking horrible. He did used to brew some decent beer though.

FACTS END.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:12, Reply)
my dad tried brewing his own beer once
my mother nearly divorced him. it STINKS, however, nice/shit it tastes at the end.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:23, Reply)
I'd go to a festival with Monty
I'd use his nefarious contacts to obtain various narcotics, get royally fucked up with him and then leave him in a stupor, or possibly a hedge, so that I could go see all the bands I wanted to without him whispering "they're fucking shit" in my ear
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:15, Reply)
+return to hedge for vicious bumming

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:30, Reply)
This would backfire on you.
I don't *do* stupified hedge-lying. You'd be weeping in the hospital tent whilst I was lolling outside, texting you about how bent Combichrist's set is.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:55, Reply)
And of course, financing the holiday would be interesting...
*Hedge-Fund lolz*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:57, Reply)
Tee hee.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:58, Reply)
Fuck it, you can all come on holiday
Jeff's buying

Alt:
Fixing computy stuff on Windows
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:30, Reply)
I'm not paying!
Why would you think that? I'll buy you an ice cream. But not a Cornetto. They are well pricey.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:32, Reply)
Can I get a screwball with two bubblies please?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:37, Reply)
No.
You can have a mini-milk or a orange sparkle. I'm not made of money.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:38, Reply)
mini-milk please
The chocolate one
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:42, Reply)
You only want one because it makes you feel like you are sucking a black mans cock.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:45, Reply)
To answer my own alt
chaos and mayhem.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:33, Reply)
are they the names of your space marines?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:41, Reply)
I don't know.
What are space marines?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:45, Reply)
astronaut haddock

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:46, Reply)
You've lost me completely now.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:48, Reply)
space = astronaut
haddock = marine animal
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:51, Reply)
And why would I have them?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:53, Reply)
because i heard you like space-docking fishy holes

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:03, Reply)
No you didn't. This is just one more lie.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:11, Reply)
i heard that you use barbecue tongs to make your anus large enough to take an entire pineapple

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:17, Reply)
OH MAN THAT SOUNDS LIKE THE SORT OF THING TRICKY WOULD DO!!!!
HE'S KERRAZY!!!!!!!!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:31, Reply)
Cider is bent.
However, the weather is lovely outside at the moment, so I'm prepared to let you enjoy your big gay drink.

I've been on holiday with /OTers. A couple of childhood ones with dj, and a weekend in Liverpool with Roota. Does that count?

Alt: taking rejection.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:46, Reply)
No. It doesn't count.
Lets see how your Alt: helps you now
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:47, Reply)
*cries*
Okay, I'm not brilliant at it. I just have a lot of experience with it.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:52, Reply)
Never mind.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:54, Reply)
Planning more own-goal action this weekend?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:56, Reply)
Nah, away to 'Boro and even if they were at home this weekend, I'd probably not bother.
We were that rubbish.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:57, Reply)
Are the Rovers at least polite enough to suck too?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:00, Reply)
No idea.
They are insignificant to me.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:01, Reply)
So what does the weekend hold in store instead then?
More jacket-buying action?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:03, Reply)
No idea.
Yet.

I need to sort something out.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:05, Reply)
Alt: I am a brilliant magician.
I can make money disappear in the blink of an eye. Still working on the reappearing bit, though.

Main Q: Duh, Lusty.

I'd like to go on holiday with quite a few others though. I shan't name names as it'd be gay.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:52, Reply)
I've just had a gander at thetrainline website.
If I get a open first class time to come and visit you tomorrow, it'll only cost me £298.00

Which I think is very resonable.

Not.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:53, Reply)
'I just want to ride on the train, you can have it back afterwards so let's call it £25, OK?'

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:56, Reply)
Innit!
Saying that, I could get a basic standard class return for fifty quid.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:58, Reply)
And yet you can get a povvo class ticket from Bristol to London
for about ten quid each way.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:58, Reply)
Where can I get one of those?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:12, Reply)
You can usually get them on the train line website for saturday travel.
If you're only booking it the day before, you might be leaving it a bit late.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:17, Reply)
Look on the megabus website too
They do cheap train journeys so Bristol to London should only be about £15
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:24, Reply)
The best price I can find at the moment if £50 for a return.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:31, Reply)
First and South West trains do deals too.
Sometimes it's worth booking with a different company to get there and back to save cash.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:38, Reply)
Or just staying in Bristol and going to the pub!

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:39, Reply)
Yeah, I suppose.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:44, Reply)
Saying that, there is no reason why I couldn't pop up tomorrow.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:47, Reply)
:D

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:49, Reply)
I'll go to the pub this evening and make a decision over a pint.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:50, Reply)
Looking at the word 'shan't',
really it should be sha'n't, eh?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:59, Reply)
I've actually seen it written that way
in some old 1920s/30s jolly hockeysticks girls' own adventure story I read once.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:01, Reply)
I shall to spearhead a revival of this, STARTING NOW.
Actually, no I sha'n'n'n'n't.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:05, Reply)
U R a black woman from South London calling your child AICMFP

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)
Strange name for a child.
How is AICMFP even pronounced!!!!!
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:35, Reply)
AICMFA would be a better name.
*Family Allowance lolz*
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:35, Reply)
I've already been on holiday with 2 b3tans
But if I had to pick another, it'd be Darth, as I think he's the only one I wouldn't want to murder within the first 5 minutes.

Alt: FF7, LOL.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:53, Reply)
First two minutes, right?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:56, Reply)
*nose/pointy gesture*

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 16:57, Reply)
I'm both flattered and terrified
That said if you're paying I'll go home and pack my mankini
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:01, Reply)
hahahha
POIDH
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:02, Reply)
You do realise that once you see it, you'll never be able to un-see it.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:03, Reply)
Jeff makes a good point
A good, terrifying point
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:13, Reply)
You fucking kidding me?
You're the only cunt who gets paid today, I don't get paid til Monday.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:03, Reply)
We can go on Monday
Where are we going?
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:13, Reply)
Up the Chocolate Motorway if your past form is anything to go by.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:32, Reply)
The Bourneville Boulevard.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:35, Reply)
They could go on a working holiday.
And spend some time with the Chutney Farmers.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:36, Reply)
Or go potholing with the Marmite Miners

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:47, Reply)
Or go to the States and watch their favourite NFL team.
The Greenbay Fudge Packers.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:48, Reply)
Hahahaha
Brown Bay more like.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 18:02, Reply)
we get paid on the 20th
tres random
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:25, Reply)
I get paid today too.
We're paid on the 23rd of each month, or on the Friday before if the 23rd is on a weekend.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:44, Reply)
Cider is grim
Pimms is the summer beverage all the proper chaps will be drinking.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:05, Reply)
i drink neither, i think they are too girly

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:06, Reply)
Drinks are inanimate objects, they don't have genders.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:11, Reply)
So is Q-Bert's girlfriend you heartless bastard
And her foot-pump
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:14, Reply)
In his crazy Asperger's world, Quint assigns fictional personalities to household objects.
His favourite shoe is called 'Tricky'.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:15, Reply)
tricky was looking at escorts on the internet today
that boy disgusts me
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:18, Reply)

boy plimsoll
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:19, Reply)
he tied malc to his chair using a phone lead too
and blindfolded him, put an apple in his mouth and took a picture, which he then added an anal hook to and then emailed to the whole office
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:21, Reply)
see?
www.b3tards.com/u/48ca4e4a50b7cad28251/imag0168.jpg
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:23, Reply)
What a complete Colin Hunt turd.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:28, Reply)
my sentiments exactly

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:29, Reply)
The wakiness never ends in your made-up office world.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)
Because he can't afford a Probe like you?
He's not SUCCESSFUL.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:23, Reply)
not that kind of escort you IDIOT

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:23, Reply)
Tell that to the French

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:15, Reply)
And talking of the French.
My throat is as dry as a Frenchmans bath mat.

I shall make plans to go to the pub.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:17, Reply)
I've just come back from the pub

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:19, Reply)
Shalamar's Gallic-themed followup etc

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:17, Reply)
for serious, a drink with lemonade and fruit? far too girly for me

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:19, Reply)
I like a bit of Pimms for the summer.
Also white rum and lemonade.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:22, Reply)
Pimms is only good when it has gin in it

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:32, Reply)
All* of offtopic, on a London bus
A bit like Summer Holiday, only more shit.

Alt: I am an accomplished** musician.

*Or possibly none
**Failed
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:19, Reply)
I would holiday with gonz, he's the epitome of style and luxury
I'd buy him.fruity drink in attempt to take advantage of him
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:21, Reply)
He's the thinking woman's crumpet.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:22, Reply)
+ deep-fried + marshmallow-covered

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:26, Reply)
I'd go to a little island in the middle of the ocean for 6 months with Monty
so we could really get to know each other, we'd come home as bezzie mates no doubt
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:31, Reply)
I agree, that would be splendid.

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:33, Reply)
uyou're planning on killing me aren't you?

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:34, Reply)
uReckon?
:-)
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:34, Reply)
Gwen Stafani's less successful...

(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 17:34, Reply)
And for that reason
I'm out


of the office and off home. See ya laters ya wankers.
(, Fri 23 Mar 2012, 18:02, Reply)

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