I'm going to Birmingham AND Leamington today!
How rock 'n' roll is that!? What does your Friday hold in store for you, my fellow B3TANs? Do you have plans for tonight which include drink?

Alt: The Paralymics. Interested or not?
Altalt: I dunno, what's the finest breakfast you've ever had and where did you have it?
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:22, 121 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

A fuckton of work, followed by my friend's birthday, which will involve lots of drinking, yes.
Alt: If it's on, I might watch it, that's about as far as my interest goes.

AltAlt: Ponderosa breakfast in Florida, had absolutely everything you'd ever want.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:30, Reply)

Ponderosa fives.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:49, Reply)

I knew someone else had mentioned it, couldn't remember if it was you or not!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:05, Reply)

It may well have been.
Sets you up for the day good and proper, like.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:08, Reply)

Very much so

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:10, Reply)

Today, rushing about like the proverbial blue arsed fly
as I start 3 weeks off tomorrow \o/

Beers in once I get home, I think!

alt: Mildly, wheelchair rugby sounds like it might be fun to watch. The ITV drama thing about it last night was good, too.

altalt: Full English everything on it on Benidorm front - for 90 pesetas, when there were about 250 to a £.
Bloody Euro has a lot to answer for……
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:42, Reply)

Egg and chips for your tea?

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:47, Reply)

No, steak, hopefully
I guess you're trying to insinuate that I'm a pleb for going to Benidorm, right? Don't knock it till you've tried it, it wasn't that bad 20 years ago, and it was so clean it made Blackpool look like the cesspit it undoubtedly is. And it was cheaper, too, sadly not the case since the Euro came in.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:55, Reply)

No the pikey bit is experiencing the local flavours by heading to 'Betty's English Cafe' in Benidorm to have a 'full English'
it puts a marker down for the nature of your holidaying experience. Apart from the package holiday bits of places like Benidorm or Malaga they're pretty descent places to go to, hitoric centres, if you head inland there's less tourist shit and what have you.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:01, Reply)

Malaga isn't a bad place to base yourself in for a week - you can get to all sorts of interesting stuff within an hour's drive.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:04, Reply)

The rents have a villa down by Marbella, there's loads to see and do between Malaga, Marbella and Gibraltar; or you can head inland into Andalucia
there's as much egg and chips as you want if you're so inclined as well
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:07, Reply)

Ever been to Salabrena? East of Alumecar.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:14, Reply)

No, but it sounds dreamy
we could hold hands and watch the sun go down from the terrace
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:21, Reply)

Be gentle with me darling x

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:22, Reply)

Indeed
Never understood why someone would go to another country to drink Tetley bitter and eat fish&chips while watching the Premiership on Sky!
We avoided those places, but the lure of a hangover cure full English for 40p was too much to resist......
Funniest thing was a group of Icelandic people who spent the whole week completely shitfaced. Beer was something like £9 a pint at home for them, so when they could get pints of San Miguel for £1.50 or so they went a bit nuts!
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:09, Reply)

CSB

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:12, Reply)

Can't Stop Buggering?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:18, Reply)

Cock Sucking Bastard?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:18, Reply)

Crazy Subarctic Boozers?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:19, Reply)

Crappy Spanish Beer?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:19, Reply)

Cool story bro.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:20, Reply)

Do you know, that never occurred to me

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:21, Reply)

Clean Spanish Beaches?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:20, Reply)

Benidorm
Classy.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:50, Reply)

I bet he only frequents Irish and British pubs when abroad and is a tasty red/magenta colour all over

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:10, Reply)

A 'proper boozer' where you can get Carling and Steak and Kidney pie
and they show repeats of Only Fools and Horses all day long.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:13, Reply)

Yup
I am also 23 stone, covered in tattoos and hang my Rangers flag over the balcony of the hotel room for the entire week.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:15, Reply)

Some work, some skiving
Then tonight, if my wife gets her way, camping in a damp rainy field. If I get my way, listening to records, eating curry and drinking at a friend's house.

Alt: Not a jot.
Altalt: Probably the full (veggie) breakfast at the hotel in Port Meirion.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:49, Reply)

Grilled to tomato and mushrooms is hardly a full breakfast

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:09, Reply)

Why are you stammering?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:10, Reply)

Your mum is tickling my prostate

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:11, Reply)

Try not to shit on her again please.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:17, Reply)

*tries*
*fails*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:25, Reply)

I'll have the Number 7 please

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:11, Reply)

Last day in this job.
Followed by a "few" leaving drinks in the toon.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 8:52, Reply)

I saw batman last night, I was a little disappointed
But only because I had such high expctations
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:08, Reply)

You expected shootings?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:10, Reply)

Maybe...

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:11, Reply)

It is disappointing that you didn't get shot.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:14, Reply)

or at least touched up by the cinema queer

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:23, Reply)

someone did offer me some popcorn, but they'd dropped their hotdog into it so I only had a little bit

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:26, Reply)

he lied about a snail having fallen into it

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:32, Reply)

Apart from the pacing it was almost perfect. What disappointed you?

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)

I didn't find it that engaging, and Batman didn't do many batman things. He just slugged it out with Bane and flew aroundin his helicopter thing
The hell on earth prison really seemed pretty nice I thought, too much of it was in daylight (sounds odd, but the dark fits I think, I didn't believe that the citizens would have risen up as they did either, the ending was a bit of a lazy plot twist as well.

I did enjoy it, but The Dark Knight was much better, I think Ledger was a hard act toi follow
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:38, Reply)

Do you know what?
I think this might be a film for kids.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:51, Reply)

I would say it's universal actually

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)

Agree about ledger, I know Nolan made a conscious choice to have much more daylight in the film, something about Bruce realising he is still a person or summit.
Agree with the prison but for a Nolan universe it was pretty much spot on. The plot twist at the end all depends on how you view that characters role in the film up until that point. Being a gay geek I frickin loved it.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:07, Reply)

My Friday has started with a bacon and egg sandwich
It's likely to be downhill from there. Team lunch today, that's something.

Alt: Has it started yet?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:10, Reply)

A fuckton of work and potentially putting a reserve down on a house
This will require beer

Alt: Yeah - we had a paralympic motivational speaker at one of our conferences a few years ago and the way he described all the training and sacrifices was quite enthralling.

AltAlt:
Last Christmas Day - 12 rashers of excellent smoked bacon in a massive bun. Or Eggs Benedict at the Malmaison
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:10, Reply)

I have a night in tonight and a free day tomorrow then the cricket at Lords on Sunday
alt: Not even a tiny little flid armed bit.

altalt: Cafe Delight on the Gloucester Road in Bristol was great
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:27, Reply)

Fucking hell
I turn up to work fifteen minutes early, pick up a phone call because I'm a helpful guy and my reward? A complete and total spastic. Idiotic end user who's managed to brick her laptop. Everything I ask her to do it's like I'm asking her to push a boulder up a hill. Huffs and puffs and sighs and the smell of burning martyr.

Yes, I am into London tonight for drinks.

Alt: No, ta.
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:31, Reply)

Shhh, don't give away my secret that I'm a girl on the internet

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:32, Reply)

Have you ever called up tech support and had to have an "Enter" key explained to you?
No? That's the class of user we have.
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:33, Reply)

But which one is 'any key'?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:35, Reply)

Here's another one. Actual conversation.
"Hi, our fax machine's broken"
"What's your fax number?"
"What's a fax number?"
"If I wanted to send you a fax, what number would I dial?"
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:38, Reply)

S'times like this I wish I were in That London!

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:33, Reply)

The ill fated Foo Fighters/Chas n' Dave collaboration album?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:37, Reply)

Oh yes, I'm putting on my DJ and going out to the Dorchester for supper
followed by Die Fleidermaus.

Hahaha, no, I'm going to the pub.
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:40, Reply)

+ alone in my stained vest and trackies bums to play the fruities in the desperate hope I might win enough money to pay for some electricity this week

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)

It's like you can see into my soul, Ape

( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)

Seriously, you guys go out in trackies in public??
I thought only us australian students could do that?
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:49, Reply)

Oh no, we have scum here too, you know.

( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:52, Reply)

I thought I largely escaped the scum of England.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:59, Reply)

Where are you?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:08, Reply)

I was going to have beers with my mate then go big TV shopping...

But it looks like that's not going to fucking happen now :(
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:32, Reply)

did your mate finally come clean and tell you that he actually doesn'y like you and only sees you as he feels guilty?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:33, Reply)

Worse!

(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:35, Reply)

He's come out of the closet and want to bum you?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:40, Reply)

well considering I was spectacularly dumped last friday night, and I've spent all week getting over the shock of it by hiding at my friend's house, tonight I'm going to get prettied up and go out with some friends.
I'm buggered if I'm going to let him make me miserable forever.
I'm going to a bar where my mate's band is playing, I will eat pizza, and attempt to put the 6kgs I've lost this week back on.

Alt: No.
Alt alt: on the floor of my mate's living room. Berries and museli with orange juice. after not eating for three days, it was heavenly.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:33, Reply)

Sorry you got dumped Pops, but take yourself out "raging" and you'll soon feel better

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:34, Reply)

what is raging?

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:35, Reply)

you can drop this act you know, we're all friends here

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:37, Reply)

It's australian for going on a mad night out, they do it in Neighboiurs all the time

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:39, Reply)

Oh. I don't think it'll be a *mad* night out.
but it'll be nice to go out and listen to some music.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:40, Reply)

I bet she's well "stoked" about going "raging"
it'll be proper "bonza"
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:41, Reply)

she'll be 'hooning' around as well no doubt

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:43, Reply)

Dirty fucking bitch!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:44, Reply)

Whoa, she's just been dumped by Noel, no need to harsh out on her

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:45, Reply)

Omg get with the fucking program.
Noel and I split up last year. This was a different person.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)

He must have been called Noel as well
You're forever trapped in a vicious circle of finding the perfect Noel.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:51, Reply)

why must he have been called Noel?

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)

The angels did say.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1706687
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)

what a "skank"!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:47, Reply)

it's nice to see you're assimilating Australian Slang so well

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:48, Reply)

Thanks
You "dag"
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:49, Reply)

You're welcome, you twat.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:50, Reply)

He really is a galah, isn't he?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)

A flaming one, I'll be bound.

( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:53, Reply)

Strewth!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)

Damn your eyes!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)

A flaming one?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)

Whenever you're ready, Nakers

( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:54, Reply)

Brace yourself Sheila, I'm going in dry

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:56, Reply)

And the award for slowest stereotypical response goes to...

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:55, Reply)

Bouncer the dog

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 9:58, Reply)

galahs are so cute
they are pink
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:01, Reply)

So is Nakers
Pink, I mean.
I imagine him to be one of those pink-faced posh boys.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:02, Reply)

he describes himself as tall and skinny but with a beer belly
consequently i think of him as more like a giraffe than anything else
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)

Hold up a flaming minute! I do not have a beer gut, OK I don't exactly have Abercrombie abs but still!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:05, Reply)

whoa, whoa, easy boy!
now, i am not accusing you of having a wobbly gunt; i am just saying that you described yourself as a skinny bloke with a gut!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:11, Reply)

Who has also seen a cockatoo

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)

You've had one on your tongue

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:08, Reply)

It was your mum's

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:09, Reply)

I'm one of those.

( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:04, Reply)

typical rswipe.
Focus on the pink birdies.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)

well we don't have any over here!
apart from chaffinches. and they sing too loudly to be cute. repetitive little retards.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:03, Reply)

And what do you think Galahs do? Mumble?! they're fucking annoying!

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:08, Reply)

noooooo
they are too cute for that, surely!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:10, Reply)

"The term galah has long since been used as a term of insult in two distinct ways, stupidity and loudness. In fact most people using the term galah have no idea that it is in fact a bird. In a survey most people who expressed an opinion believed it originated with an Aboriginal term for Woolworths checkout girl. "
uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Galah
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:12, Reply)

america, stauffers champagne breakfast buffet
they had over 350 different items. it was ridiculous. but amazing.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:00, Reply)

did they have Shreddies?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:11, Reply)

probably
but with 349 other items, i wasn't for eating dry pieces of sawdust
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:21, Reply)

What's your BEST SONG EVER
This is mine:

Two hearts, believing in just one mind
Beating together till the end of time
You know we're two hearts believing in just one mind
Together forever till the end of time


YEAH
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:11, Reply)

isn't that..... phil collins?
you mediocre cunt
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:12, Reply)

She's an easy lover!
She'll get a hold on you believe it
( Kroney, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:15, Reply)

I hate you as I hate hell and all Phil Collins fans

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:16, Reply)

Phil Collins has some AMAZING songs. I have three of his cd's in my car.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:20, Reply)

She's the kinda girl you dream of,
Dream of keeping hold of,
Never forget it,
ooooo you'll regret it...
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:19, Reply)

I like "Shut your fucking face" by the naked apes

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:13, Reply)

KILL THIS SUBTHREAD WITH FIRE

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 17 Aug 2012, 10:22, Reply)