Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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This one's going out to the OLD SKOOL REGULARS, the positive, fluffy guys like The Resident Loon.I got a text from my ex on Monday asking me if I had this month's Classic Rock. I said no, and asked why: turns out she was in the supermarket and my little girl was insisting on her buying it for me because it has Jimi Hendrix on the cover. This makes me go 'awwwwww'.
When did you last feel really touched by the selfless or thoughtful actions/words of another?
Alt: Gay cunt
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:52,
155 replies,
latest was 13 years ago)
Sober as a frickin' JUDGE here(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:55,
Reply)
*fives*just did coke off the office desk which I *think* makes me cool
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broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:04,
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It's not my drug of choice tbh put any port in a 2hr sleep hungover storm(
broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:09,
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Yay!I'm back off to Shiraz in Marbella port in 15 mins, I'll buy a drink for any b3tans that turn up there before 6
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broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:56,
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There is a cheeky bottle of Shiraz at home for this cow tonight(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:56,
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I'm coming as fast as my little brown Patelly legs can carry me(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:57,
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I tell you whatif semen patel turned up at shiraz, puerto deportivo marbella before 6pm tonight (Spain time) I'd give him an open tab
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broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:58,
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Semen Patel pays for no drinks(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:58,
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You'd be right to do so.Guys like that....I mean...just wow.
They sure broke the mould when they made the Patster.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:59,
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Do you call him the Patster?I call him the Semenster
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broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:00,
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I call him loads of different names.'Seemsy', 'Patmaster Pat and the Furious Pat', 'Paternoster Square', 'Seme 3PO' - whatever comes to mind. He doesn't give a fuck. That's how 'The Notorious SMP' rolls.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:04,
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You gotta love the fella, everyone has a different nickname for Semen Patel(
broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:05,
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He is all things to all people.Truly a man for all seasons.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:06,
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My mate has just been diagnosed with Hodgkins lymphoma for a 2nd time and is on chemo My kids immediately on being told that "Uncle Paul" was poorly both drew him pictures to cheer him up.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:54,
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I was proper choked up about itHe was over the moon and texted me a pic of their pictures pinned up on his fridge.
GET WELL PAUL
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 15:58,
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According to the news Some footballers are wearing ribbons tonight "in support of missing child April Jones"Why do they bother calling her "missing" when the blokes been charged with murder?
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:03, Reply)
maybe there are particular bits missing(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:04,
Reply)
I was touched when your daughter bought me a new lovely watch and a photo of you with a shit beard drawn on(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:04,
Reply)
I touched your daughter, right in the 'shit beard'.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:05,
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Some blokes in the pub showed me a clip off of that celebrity juice thingthey were laughing their tits off
is it me or is it not funny?
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broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:06,
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Nah, other people are also not remotely funny.Don't beat yourself up about it.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:09,
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*looks around*Yup, not funny at all here.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:32,
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When my mate said I could have his Xbox 360, 2 controllers and a few games for £50as soon as he's checked to see what they're going for on eBay, and made sure he can't make a bit more than that. Proper tugged on my heart strings, that did.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:09,
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I was touched by JimmehReally touched
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:09,
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In other newsJimmy Savile's family have had the
gravestone removed along with the flowers
as a mark of respect. It just leaves a small
hole and no bush around it.
Just what he would have wanted.
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:19, Reply)
edited, sozgonna try to give up swearing on b3ta, just for you TH
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:13, Reply)
One day at a time, QuinceHopefully others will take inspiration from you. You command a lot of respect here, it would be a shame to waste it on profanity.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:17,
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Listen to this guy, Q - he knows what he;s talking about!(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:19,
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People under-estimate THReally, I think he's a great guy
I can't think of anyone on B3ta I like more
Couldn't we all try to be a bit more like him?
Don't you think that would be a good idea?
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:29, Reply)
Looks like an A from here, dude.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:31,
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how do you start a sentence beginning with a K?there aren't many words except knife and knight that begin with K
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:34, Reply)
'Kids love him and so should you'?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:34,
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Is there such a thing as 'too Savile'?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:46,
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All this 'celebrity nonce' stuff is really getting me down, QThese are people we watched on TV when we were kids...these were people that were liked and (more importantly) trusted. For fuck's sake...if Michael Jackson and Jimmy Saville can't be trusted with children, who else is fucking guilty? I don't want to live on this planet anymore :(
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:47,
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we might as well all start noncing kidsit seems to be all the rage
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:09, Reply)
I'd just like to hijack SPOOKY PATELs thread to wish all my new qotw off topic chumsthe bestest of weekends :) Have a good one guys and girls :)
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broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:11,
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Never. I am a robot with a heart of ice.Unless I see kittens and then I go all squishy.
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Kroney, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:11,
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Or firearmsThen you go all surrendery
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:12,
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www.youtube.com/watch?v=HYPqA4slnbQ
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:22,
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Brizzle. It was decided (quite rightly) that you look French.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:24,
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It's certainly in my top one.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:31,
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Well, it certainly was for the poor cunt that got glassed at 1am.(
Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:25,
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I frequently need to speak to a Surenderan as part of workIronically, he is Indian and not French
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:20,
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It's her terrible wind problemsand the fact that her tits fall down to her knees when she unhooks her bra and her clunge looks like some just punched a bowl of porridge.
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:22, Reply)
That Jimmy fellow touched me.I thought only nurses took your temperature, and with a thermometer, not their finger.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:13,
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I gave malc a couple of extra hours of freedom by pushing some bird in front of a train(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:14,
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I work with a great bloke at the moment.He's one of the best people I have ever met and is always helping me out (I've known him over ten years). I think he should have gone really far in his career, as he's really talented, but I found out the other day that he has spent a lot of his life looking after his very ill mum :-(
Also, nice one - daughters always keep it real and no matter what your ex does, your daughter will think you're great.
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:15, Reply)
No way, he's about the nicest person I've ever met.He bought a 12-string guitar the other week and keeps it at work to play on at the weekend - I think it's his 'space'.
(, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:22, Reply)
When that all round Brizzle "comedian" worried so much about his birdthat he "asked" her to write all the bad things down
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:17,
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I thought asking her to shutdown all email addresses and facebook was thoughtful tooGives them much more "us" time
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:27,
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So worried about her that he insisted she sleep facing himin case she developed a respiratory condition in the night. What a guy.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:28,
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My 8yo daughterInsisted on baking me some badly burned gingerbread after school today, as I'm going "to work" tonight, which means flying out to a worksite for 2 weeks. She wants to make sure I have some "nice biscuits" for morning tea. Despite the slightly charcoal taste, they are pretty good.
Love conquers beginners baking skills.
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Ken Oath, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:19,
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holy fuck it's only the high jizz wizard himself Ken Oath!(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:20,
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Needs more wholegrain.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:43,
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Oathsy you crazy old troll you.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:28,
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ooh oohI'll get all uptight and anal retentive about the definition of troll. I simply refer you to the Troll Act of 2009 which clearly states that trolling is confined to baiting shut-ins and call centre monkeys
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Ken Oath, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:34,
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Any more dalliances with EMV today?(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:42,
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b3ta.com/questions/bestthingivebuilt/post1755759
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:59,
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Alt: GayCuntThat phrase reminds me; one of my brothers is gay, he refers to the male anus as "mancunt". ie: "went to a new club last night, scored some fresh mancunt".
Um, righto. So, you made a new friend then?
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Ken Oath, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:44,
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not disgustingJust a bit more earthy in their description of body parts.
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Ken Oath, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 16:56,
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Hitler 'selected' them and all. And rightly so, I say.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:12,
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Yellow stars to the right.Here I am, stuck in the middle with Jews.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:21,
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I'm rather pleased with that one.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:29,
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no.That would be incestuous homosexual behaviour, which you seem a bit excited about, but it is quite repugnent to me. But don't let me prevent you from giving it a red hot go.
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Ken Oath, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:01,
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Yo Mr patel I bet your the best at hide and sikhAlt: what use would a gay cunt be?
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:29,
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Yo Double H.Alt: If a gay cunt could cunt gay?
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:30,
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I'm sure that the arsehole would prevail in this event(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 12 Oct 2012, 17:34,
Reply)
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