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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Any one had appendicitis? i have a pain in my side

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:07, 189 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
My brother had it.
You don't have it.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)
phew, thanks Doc

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Does it hurt when you touch it?
How about your stomach? Does that hurt when you touch it too?

Maybe you've got a sore hand.

HTH xxx
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:10, Reply)
that's the other hand...

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Soz, Nakkers, Not really my area of expertise.
If it's something more ecumenical, then I'm your man.

Or fisting. Come to mention it, mainly fisting.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:23, Reply)
Yeti's exploded.
They couldn't find it when they operated so that was their conclusion.

Two months later it turned out they were wrong, cos it happened again. They'd missed it the first time because he's a fat cunt. LOL.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:11, Reply)
doesn't that kill you?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:12, Reply)
Sadly not.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:12, Reply)
are you not fweinds anymore?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:12, Reply)
Not really. The shitbag stitched me up.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:14, Reply)
What'd he do?
I bet it involved illicit substances.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
oh dear, a drug deal gone sour
it's like something from the moovies
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
*Sits down cross legged towards the front of the semi circle*

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:17, Reply)
SURGEON WAS HE?
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLI'm really very tired
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:20, Reply)
ahahahah YES

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Come on, let's not be silly. The Appendix isn't real, don't believe everything you read in the Fortean times

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:13, Reply)
Tut. The Irish are so iggerant. I thought better of you, tee orban

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:14, Reply)
Just cos I don't believe in your obvious fairy tales
Next you'll be telling me cancer is real.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
My ex girlfriend's star sign was Cancer, which was ironic considering how she died.




crushed to death by a giant crab
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:16, Reply)
That's what happens if you try to suck off crustaceans down at Eastbourne beach

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:17, Reply)
RACIST

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Woah hold on I didn't mean crabwogs

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Crushed ones at that

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:24, Reply)
Course it's real! I love it!!!
That Alan Sugar's a right old character isn't he?

YOU'RE FIRED!!! ahaha what a guy!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
He looks like an angry testicle

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
Kylelolz

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
YOU'RE NOT WORKING HERE ANYMORE PLEASE LEAVE
What a card!
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:15, Reply)
Jimmy Nail's lesser known comeback single

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:18, Reply)
She's lying

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Yup, a few times, have a dodgy pancreas thats caused it.
Does it feel like you're prepaired to take a leathal amount of painkillers to Make It Go Away ?
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:18, Reply)
no not yet...I was born without a pancreas, true fact

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Without a brain, too.
You're a medical marvel.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:20, Reply)
You are a smelly and cruel frenchman

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:21, Reply)
lol he's such an onion wearer.
What a French prick.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)
Do you spunk air?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:20, Reply)
do you spunk insulin?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:21, Reply)
I spunk jam from my right testicle and dairylea from my left one

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:24, Reply)
Kids'll do anything for the taste of dairylea.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)
clicky

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)
What even the hoovering?
I've been giving out this glorious cheese spunk for free for too long!
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)
Is Nakers dead yet?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)
nope

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:19, Reply)
GREAT NEWS

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:21, Reply)
I have an appendix.
Can I be in your gang?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:20, Reply)
That depends, is this an ironic appendix?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:21, Reply)
it's a post modern appendix

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:21, Reply)
my appendix has nothing to do with postmodernism.
Soz.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)
It doesn't? Oh mna I'm going to have to start my dissertation all over again :(

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Better you find out now rather than later.
Maybe just replace it with White Noise or summat. Naked Lunch if you're feeling all interesting and alternative.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)
how would I know?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)
I was rushed to hospital with suspected appendicitis once when I was little.
It turned out that I was just a massive crybaby with a slight tummy ache.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:23, Reply)
this doesn't surprise me one little bit "Motorway Mary"

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:24, Reply)
I have not had appendicitis.
I have, however, had the *test* for appendicitis, when I had that kidney infection.

The test is not fun.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:24, Reply)
did they shove a tube upn your willy

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)
Erm - girls don't have those
Unless they want one, obv
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)
check dis yo

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:24, Reply)
I've made it too small. Soz
Basically the Brew and Super are on a shelf that reds 'Low Alcohol'

ALCO-LOL MORE LIKE"!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)
THEOBAN TO THE RESCUE, ENHANCE!

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)
Excellent I'll easily be able to drink 10 then drive home

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)
Is that the "tramp offers" aisle?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)
My brother took this pic and sent it to me so yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)
Aha
May I claim to be the taker of this excellent pic? I eas actually looking for something with lower calories at the time due to being politely reminded that I am getting chubby!
To the left,out of shot is Gold Label FFS
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:29, Reply)
are you Mointy's brother?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:31, Reply)
Whose?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:32, Reply)
Your Irish relative

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)
to be sure

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)
ha ha
no, I am not his brother. Guess again young redeemer
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:33, Reply)
Are you my brother?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)
no
I am the brother of nobody.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)
Dad?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)
depends
Does your dad have a girl's name?
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:38, Reply)
Is Brian a girl's name?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)
It's Briana you fool

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)
That's a porn star's name
IF MEMORY SERVES
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)
WTF
No you benny.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)
My name is Alex

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)
+ and I'm a cottaging addict

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:44, Reply)
I do love a nice break, like down in Shropshire

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)
Really
I know someone called Alex. Is it you?
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)
Dad?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:46, Reply)
I am NOT YOUR DAD
ok.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)
How do you know?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)
are you my dad?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:50, Reply)
I do have some Irish relatives.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)
I don't

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)
Then your search for your father must continue O'Bhan.
Try searching where the Blarney Roses grow?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:03, Reply)
That's only just up the road and it's filled with japs
I don't have the eyes for that so not checked there.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:06, Reply)
coz I is a bird innit
therefore father of nowt!
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:52, Reply)
Damn
One of you is bound to be my dad
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:49, Reply)
you appear to be a girl
prepare yourself for some sweaty internet pawing
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:34, Reply)
bring it on
I can handle it.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)
+love

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)
right
if there is no sweaty internet pawing about to happen I am going to walk my dog. Laters x
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)
Thanks for coming!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)
I didn't
you should try harder next time.
(Purpledoris I've got afeckin' job, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)
N0MZ0RZ

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:32, Reply)
You haven;t got appendicitus.
Just a nasty case of massive bent spastic.
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:25, Reply)
I think maybe I've drunk too much coffee

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:26, Reply)
IT'S TRAPPED WIND, YOU HYPOCHONDRIAC!!

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Have you checked for Roman Soliders
*spear of destiny lols*
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:32, Reply)
It's terminal.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:35, Reply)
Tom hanks is sucha prick

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:36, Reply)
You're pretty much done for

(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:28, Reply)
no
side arse
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)
lol Nakers has a sidearse

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:37, Reply)
I bet he does as well.
Just to be different.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:39, Reply)
I am not differently abled

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:40, Reply)
You have an arse like a chinky's fanny.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:41, Reply)
imagine the state of his toile-
no. don't.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)
Can't he just sit side saddle on the bog?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)
what an absolutely revolting image
click
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:58, Reply)
IMAGINE THE STATE OF YOUR FACE!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)
hey, my face is HAWT

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:57, Reply)
Oh what to strikethrough....
WT +IRY
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:58, Reply)
Bellamy lols

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:00, Reply)
That'll be the menopause

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:59, Reply)
oooff
*click*
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:01, Reply)
POW right in the ovaries

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:01, Reply)
no such luck
you have no idea what it's like to have fucking periods
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:01, Reply)
It can't be that bad if you can still ski, play tennis and rollerbalde

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)
Favourite fantasy girl-the happy one in the Tampax advert
Fantasy as in does not exist
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:04, Reply)
yeah
whilst curled up around a hot water bottle cripppled and gorging on chocolate
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:04, Reply)
low pain threshold, that's the problem with you broads

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:06, Reply)
Some of them don't half make a fuss about childbirth and all.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:14, Reply)
From what I've witnessed the menopause is pretty shit too.
Soz.
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:05, Reply)
meh i'm 20 years off that
they'll have fixed it with DRUGZ by then
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)
Nakers, nakers, arse on his hip
Nakers, nakers, has to lie down to shit
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)
terible bullying :'o(((((((((((((

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:43, Reply)
CHINKY FANNY CHINKY FANNY

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)
*defcon bongle*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)
Bent sidearse spastic

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:48, Reply)
As he has to put his pants on sideways to cover his arse
it means his cock dangles out a leg hole.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:44, Reply)
Both his legs have to go down the other hole and Nakers has to hop everywhere
HAHA FUCKEN HOPPING SIDE SHITTER
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)
you have put too much thought into this

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:00, Reply)

leg hole pocket
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:46, Reply)
What was that? I'm sorry, I can't read your post past
ALL THESE ONIONS.

Cow.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)
this makes no sense
nonsense, if you will
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:42, Reply)
Aint my fault you're a brie muncher.
Have a tarte tatin and calm down yeah?
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:45, Reply)
I fucken love tarte tartin

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)
TO MANY TO CHOOSE FROM
BEST SUB-THREAD EVAH
This needs to make the popular page
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1856357
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:49, Reply)
Better a Frog than a Sideshitter.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:47, Reply)
In an odd twist of fate
I have just come into possession of 60ish talking classics audiobooks.

The first one that jumped out at me is 'She'.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 7 Feb 2013, 15:52, Reply)
Also
I've figured out why Nakers has such a hard time figuring out which cable connector he needs: http://www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1856312
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:02, Reply)
So nothing at all to do with him being
A BENT SPASTIC
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:04, Reply)
Well if his sockets are in a different place to everyone else's...

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:06, Reply)
Either that, or his missus has one of each...

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 7 Feb 2013, 16:10, Reply)

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