Drivers: Don't fuck up.
So I was driving home from work the other hour, and what do you know, the truck in front of me threw out the anchor, the whole procedure accompanied by squealing tires and a crashy noise.

I get out, grab my kit, and head over. The truck driver is sitting in his cab, staring straight ahead. In front of the truck there's a nissan micra, with it's driver's side about half as wide as it should be. A quick check showed a driver with a broken left side. Still making some respirative effort, but seeing as his head was soft and I couldn't find an intact bone on the side that got hit I left him be. In the front passenger seat I found a womat, 25-ish, with no feeling below her belly button, signs of concussion, and complaining of neck pain. This one at least was saveable, I helped the 'bolance crew get her out and into the air-bulance.

What really shocked me was the child's seat in the back, together with the busted window. We found the girl after a few minutes, dead from being thrown through said window and into the embankment. Three years old and quite literally battered to death, all because her presumed parents were too stupid to put her in her seat in the correct fashion.

Tl;dr:

Watch the road while driving, and use seatbelts.

/Venting
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:21, 141 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

was it a 1.2 or 1.5l?

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:28, Reply)

Oof.
but worth a click nonetheless.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:03, Reply)

Hey Germanguy,
Glad to see you embracing off topic.

How did they crash, do you know?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:29, Reply)

From how it looked, Micra Guy drove across a 4-way intersection without looking and got T-Boned by the truck. 40 tons at 80kph is rather more than a compact car can take.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:31, Reply)

Well, it's certainly a compact now.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:32, Reply)

It's a good job this isn't QOTW.
You might get told off for levity.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:37, Reply)

*spits tea*

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:17, Reply)

yo AB he's still flailing around on QOTW

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:18, Reply)

My favourite Happy Phantom moment was his defence of the bloke with the wrong trousers on.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:20, Reply)

Ohhhhh, I cant even be bothered to look at his profile
I remember the Rory mum poem and shaking my head at the time, you kinda know to call it a day when ringofire* is trolling you

*the other ROF
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:25, Reply)

Here we are.
b3ta.com/questions/dad/post986596

Yeah, you're onto a loser when even fellow members of the 'you're ruining QOTW' crowd are chipping in and calling you a prick.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:31, Reply)

hahaha

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:39, Reply)

So you've had a great day.
Not as great as the people in the car, but pretty terrific all the same.

I don't know about venting, it sounds like you need a good stiff drink. And a few days off work.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:35, Reply)

The stiff drink is in the process of being drunk. Days off work may happen, depends on how well I sleep tonight.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:37, Reply)

Hopefully you sleep better than I suspect you're expecting to.
Is there a good provision for counselling after traumatic situations like this?

I can't remember: are you a medical type person?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:40, Reply)

I'm of the "putting on silly clothes and guns, then going to forrin places" persuasion.

Still, having something like this happen unexpectedly is not exactly nice. There is counseling, but it is of some religious flavor or other, so no thanks.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:46, Reply)

You don't have Wehrpflicht anymore, do you?
So you're a real, actual, serious soldier?
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:49, Reply)

Soldiering is srs bsns now.

CBRNE soldiering is still a combination of homebrew, boredom and using water purification equipment so set up semi-private swimming pools, then charge a fee of one booze per use.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:52, Reply)

Sounds like a cross between Sgt Bilko and MASH.


Not to sound too stalkery, but where are you based? It's been too long since I was last in Germany.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:55, Reply)

Let's just say that you can throw a rock in almost every direction and manage to hit austria.

Oh, and it's so far off the beaten path that the local's family trees are circular.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:58, Reply)

bayern then?
I was based in Schwabenland when I last lived over your way. I did visit Eichstatt, but that's as far off the beaten track as I managed.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:02, Reply)

Yeah, Bayern. The bunghole of Germany.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:27, Reply)

My sister speaks German with a Schwabish (sch?) accent
TRUFAX
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:33, Reply)

I thought you were doing a trafic/terrific pun there for a moment.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:38, Reply)

Oddly enough
I was channelling my inner Gonz when I wrote that, and I did originally spell it wrong.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:41, Reply)

Haha

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:12, Reply)

Wowzers, that's gotta suck.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:38, Reply)

Woh', £141m on the euromillions tonight, gotta go for that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:41, Reply)

In a similar vein
Please be careful when emptying the bins in your kitchen. You may well stand up too quickly and twat your head on a shelf, then end up with a lump on your head the size of battered's fist, and a headache the size of Monty's overdraft.

tl;dr b3th's an idiot.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:45, Reply)

Not right Germanguy going on about these things when other people are facing real problems like this

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:47, Reply)

It's Euromadness!

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:49, Reply)

I'm not allowed an overdraft

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:50, Reply)

I did consider this when I wrote it
but I thought it was funnier than using AA.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:51, Reply)

achtung!
Whilst sat in a Berlin airport earlier and staring out the window who did we spy but French cunt and lepidopterist extraordinaire Kroney strolling across the tarmac bold as brass.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:48, Reply)

The French invading Germany? That's the wrong way round.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:54, Reply)

Q: Why are there so many tree-lined roads in France?
A: Because German soldiers want to march in the shade.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:56, Reply)

I like this

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:58, Reply)

Q: What's the French battle flag?
A: White eagle with a white border, on a white shield.
(GermanGuy invaded on, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:01, Reply)

I also like this

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:58, Reply)

it wasn't so much 'invading' as 'mincing like a woolly woofter'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:56, Reply)

This is entirely believable.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:58, Reply)

+ whilst wearing a cardigan.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:58, Reply)

You are Craig McCulloch AICMFP.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 17:57, Reply)

Is that Ed?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:03, Reply)

No this is Battered.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:05, Reply)

A hah hah ha.




Ha.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:09, Reply)

Typical as soon as I fuck off home it gets lively

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:12, Reply)

We were all waiting till you'd gone.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:16, Reply)

I thought as much :(

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:16, Reply)

Sorry, and all that.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:18, Reply)

You know what B3th
I REALLY HATE YOU :(
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:26, Reply)

Join the fucking queue.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:29, Reply)

haha

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:30, Reply)

Best sauce for a burger please.
I'm sick of horseradish.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:29, Reply)

Depends I like mustard with either HP or heinz TK

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:31, Reply)

Chimi churri.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:31, Reply)

+ who's got the keys to my beemer

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:32, Reply)

WHAT???

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:32, Reply)

This
www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQWgdKpS6rg
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:35, Reply)

Banana ketchup

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:36, Reply)

Weirdo.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:37, Reply)

It's a real thing and is quite nice

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:39, Reply)

Thank you
Yes, it is. Especially if you can get the spicy one. I've made my own, and it's not at all bad.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:40, Reply)

Some people eh, Twoey
SOME PEOPLE
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:44, Reply)

Branston sandwich pickle
bit different but it definitely works.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:39, Reply)

Haha
Wait...I don't get it.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:35, Reply)

No joke I'm having a burger.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:38, Reply)

I had a burger this evening too
Actually...I had two. Imagine that!
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:41, Reply)

just the two?
Are you ill?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:57, Reply)

Word up G
How was Germany, I'm clocking this

www.youtube.com/watch?v=npjmIRs2CW8
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:58, Reply)

nice!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:59, Reply)

I'm also having a ding-dong with Phappy Hamton on QOTW

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:01, Reply)

he's a flid

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:03, Reply)

I have realised that

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:05, Reply)

ps it was fucking splendid

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:00, Reply)

You back now?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 18:58, Reply)

jawohl

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:00, Reply)

In other news I have finally moved in to my new place. An easy wander from West Hampstead Thameslink if you want to pop round on your way back from work one evening
For a drink or 12. Not sex. Definitely not sex.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:15, Reply)

You haven't moved in properly until Stunned has pissed on the carpet.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:16, Reply)

I have them treated with Scotchguard in anticipation of this.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:22, Reply)

have them treated with Scotchguard
Installed rubber ones
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:23, Reply)

All sorted to your liking then?
even the hob?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:17, Reply)

Yeah. All good. Just need a dining table & chairs, otherwise all set. Micro seems to like the place and loves the garden.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:21, Reply)

Nice one, good to see you're bouncing back so fast

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:22, Reply)

Happier than I have been for quite some time. As others from here I see IRL will verify.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:23, Reply)

I would pop down and see this first hand but I need to pool about £8k
If my son wants to make Rio 2016
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:27, Reply)

There won't be a Rio then.
It wilk have been rioted away.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:29, Reply)

The money aint for Rio it's for the preperation

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:30, Reply)

What does he do?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:31, Reply)

Apart from dancing on the sand.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:32, Reply)

*pours pint*
Why did it take me so long to get this
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:38, Reply)

Need to practice football by the sound of it.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:32, Reply)

It's the Olympics in 2016.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:34, Reply)

He's an excellent footballer but better at rugby

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:35, Reply)

The decathalon we hope will be his main event,
but a lot of other events, starting this summer intensive training at Loughborough Uni. He will be at his peak in 2016 at the mere age of 18
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:35, Reply)

8 grand on zx spectrum keyboards is a lot.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:36, Reply)

I get this

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:37, Reply)

so, sex then?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:23, Reply)

Oh alright then.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:24, Reply)

slag

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:25, Reply)

It's ok, I had LOADS of chips

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:56, Reply)

In other news the film I'm watching is excellent

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:55, Reply)

Which film is this?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:57, Reply)

It's the excellent one, silly.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:59, Reply)

Bill and Ted I'd imagine.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:59, Reply)

*air guitars*

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 20:00, Reply)

Bogus.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 20:01, Reply)

Gnarly dude

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 20:04, Reply)

this one, do keep up
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1997292
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 19:59, Reply)