Hey guys, what's with all the 200+ threads this week?
Anyone would think this place wasn't entirely dead on its arse.

Alt: Got any 'amusing' anecdotes about the poor sods who had to teach you? Perhaps we can scare Monty off this path...
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:11, 210 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

This thread won't hit 100 posts

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:11, Reply)

your

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:16, Reply)

probably

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:16, Reply)

not

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:17, Reply)

wrong

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:17, Reply)

there

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:18, Reply)

squire

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:18, Reply)

I appreciate your efforts, lokesy

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:18, Reply)

Its

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:24, Reply)

spot the twat

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:30, Reply)

^^^^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 15:00, Reply)

OK

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:24, Reply)

man

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:24, Reply)

innit?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:25, Reply)

It's no /talk, that's for sure.
Teaching sounds a bit bollocks, long hours and ungrateful kids, dunno what the pay is though.
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:17, Reply)

Less than a GP, more than a publican.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:18, Reply)

Depends.

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:20, Reply)

Top of normal scale is around 35k

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:20, Reply)

You aren't allowed to hit them now are you?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:22, Reply)

Not "supposed" to, no

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:22, Reply)

I'd flog them, hang them and send them back.
Hang on, that's the foreigners.. .
(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:27, Reply)

...and the media
like to paint you like a lazy idiot, while making inane suggestions for education which either schools/teachers were doing anyway or which are pointless/harmful

Other than that and the paperwork, it's fun
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:03, Reply)

I'd consider teaching, if it weren't for the children.
Children are pricks.
( Kroney, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:18, Reply)

Most of the parents are pricks too.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:19, Reply)

Hi!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:20, Reply)

^^^^this
all it takes is one kid to say you touched or assaulted them and your in a world of shit, potential no job, no future job or worse on some sort of register. cos their little spawn would never make summat like that up, innit?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:22, Reply)

A mate got this and was suspended for 6 months until the girl admitted it was a lie
Mrs Cow's teaching assistant also got accused of it at the graduation ball by a 17 year old, until he mentioned that he wasn't actually at the ball
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:23, Reply)

Still, no smoke without fire eh

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:24, Reply)

Possibly not

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:25, Reply)

He wasn't at the ball but he was round the bins

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:30, Reply)

*Crowbars in old joke*
I like to call my wife Cinderella whenever she goes down on me...



Because she shall go to the balls
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:38, Reply)

One of my teachers got stabbed in the shoulder by our resident nutcase
The nutcase is now shockingly in jail for attempted murder
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:19, Reply)

Yeah, but that sort of thing couldn't happen in a London comprehensive

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:20, Reply)

No sir
They'd shoot him before stabbing him
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:22, Reply)

My threads rule
Your threads drool.

We locked an art teacher in the cupboard for a full lesson. She was a wreck at the end.
One of our other teachers suffered an aneurysm the following year after teaching us too.
Another guy we called Sweaty Barnes had no hope of teaching us science, we used to run riot.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:20, Reply)

I once managed to squirt hydrochloric acid into my chemistry teachers eye
Oops. Good job the stuff they give kids is so watered down, really
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:21, Reply)

At least your education didn't suffer...

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:26, Reply)

delete this please

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:29, Reply)

I waited six minutes for you to respond to him
then thought someone had better do it
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:32, Reply)

Just cracking open a malbec, Jesus some of us have lives here you know.

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:35, Reply)

PHEW Bullet dodged there

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:31, Reply)

At least you can write short sentences, and sometimes comprehend them Jas. It wasn't a wasted twelve years of education after all.

(Mr Udagawa, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:28, Reply)

Proud?

(DBT became a fruitarian on, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:29, Reply)

I was never the instigator.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:30, Reply)

just the reciever

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:31, Reply)

NDITB

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:43, Reply)

You should've paid attention during biology lessons.
Then you'd understand where a penis should go.
( Muns, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 15:13, Reply)

lolz

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 15:56, Reply)

I've been here, that is all

Who used to make the post counter graphs?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 14:29, Reply)

Nearly at 100

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 15:32, Reply)

101

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 15:36, Reply)

MOnty's trying to be a teacher!!
HAHAHHAHAH...I mean...good luck to him
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:04, Reply)

Monty
teacher

+ Cavy
+ Comedien
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:06, Reply)

e a

and yup, that is the noise people have been making
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:07, Reply)

\o/

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:08, Reply)

In truthfulness I am terribly impressed with you doing this
I mean, clearly I am HILARIOUS, but I don't fancy having to stand in fonrt of crowd and be funny much
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:11, Reply)

I bet it's been a right confidence boost.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:17, Reply)

i love it
i have the advantage that I don't get stage fright, all my panicking happens at the writing stage where I repeatedly lose confidence.
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:25, Reply)

I just said "relative" when I meant to say "relevant" on the phone
lol, oh dear, my life is a never ending rollercoaster of excitement.

I might take up teaching.
( Kroney, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 16:56, Reply)

Oh man you have done it again
you have said Teaching when you meant Felching
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 17:02, Reply)

It's an easy mistake to make. I find the two overlap pretty frequently.

( Kroney, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 17:13, Reply)

'well i've got a sister in Leeds'

( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 17 Sep 2014, 17:37, Reply)