Also
That the little piggy who went to market wasn't going shopping for groceries.

He wasn't coming back from that trip.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:27, 6 replies, latest was 10 years ago)

holy fuck.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:28, Reply)

There goes my childhood innocence.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:29, Reply)

I doubt they were being fed roast beef either

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:29, Reply)

This little piggy went to the slaughterhouse
This little piggy still needed fattening up before he was killed to make yummy bacon.
This little piggy had offal by products from the TB infected cattle in the next field.
This little piggy was the runt of the litter and was left to die.
This little piggy pissed himself out of fear, having realised that he was fucked no matter what happens to him.
( Muns, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:32, Reply)

My brother once had a job shepherding pigs in the slaughterhouse to the guy that kills them.
He got pissed on, shit on and even ejaculated on. Fear's a funny thing.
(McChinaman banned, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:37, Reply)

I bet it was one of those jobs where the pay was dreadful, and he did it out of love?

( Muns, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:39, Reply)

of being ejaculated on...

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:40, Reply)

Bacon flavoured.

( Muns, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:41, Reply)

He said it was alright, the supervisor would give people a dab of speed on Friday afternoon to buck everyone up.
Classy times.
(McChinaman banned, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:42, Reply)

And how did the pigs cope with it?

( Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:41, Reply)

He was sold as breeding stock. He spent the rest of his days balls deep in lady pigs.
That's what I tell my son, anyway.
( Muns, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:30, Reply)

I'm not comfortable with this.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:32, Reply)

It is an eye opener isn't it?

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:33, Reply)

Why are all the nyommy bacumz sandwich meat-eaters so shocked and upset by this 'revelation'?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:36, Reply)

because it's bollocks?

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:36, Reply)

prove it. Fucko.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:40, Reply)

prove what?

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:42, Reply)

Because bacon doesn't come from pigs,
it comes from the local Spar.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:40, Reply)

an eye opener bollocks
(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:36, Reply)

because it's bollocks?

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:34, Reply)

Oh yeah, well how do you explain the one who went wee wee wee weeeeee all the way home then, M. N'Heures Souris Rames?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:37, Reply)

Screams of delight, because he was going to make it home in time to watch family fortunes.

( Muns, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:40, Reply)

^Mr Babbage

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:43, Reply)

it's a nursery rhyme

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:42, Reply)

And they won't even allow children to sing Baa Baa Black Sheep any more
It's political correctness gone mad
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:44, Reply)

Aren't most nursery rhymes just saccharine retellings of the true horror of existence?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:45, Reply)

no

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:55, Reply)

Are you telling me that Rock-a-bye Baby isn't just a nice way of saying "shut up and go to sleep or I'll bash your head in"?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:57, Reply)

I was told off by my wife for singing the Tim Minchin lullaby to my son when settling him.
It was working quite nicely too.
( Muns, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 11:04, Reply)

Well played.
My eldest found Shaun Of The Dead to be soothing background noise, but he'd scream if I watched it with the commentary on.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 11:09, Reply)

bollocks

(old man river possible lesbian, Tue 10 Mar 2015, 10:35, Reply)