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(

rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)

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And so
it falls to me again to open the doors this morning.

(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:24, 280 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Morning k
Thank god it's Friday. I've been feeling steadily worse and worse all week and I fear it's the onset of teh man-flu.

A weekend of plenty of alcohol will hopefully sort me out.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:26, Reply)

Good morrow gents!
Today will be a day of waiting until 5pm. And munching soup. And maybe some work. Then a spontaneous weekend with my mate and his immediate family drinking and smoking and eating... probably in that order. Woo!

How're you?
(

Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:29, Reply)

Nomring all (he said, dyslexically)
I'm having a half day today. Then I've got a busy weekend to make up for it.

And I have the remnants of a man flu. Actually it was a fairly low grade cold, but it's left me somewhat clogged of lung and throat. I don't recommend it!
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:37, Reply)

Top o' the mornin' to ya
Woo for Friday. Tomorrow I'm going to this. Now I just need today to hurry up and go away!
(

Captain V, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:37, Reply)

rubberduck
man-flu is a term invented by women for when men are milking an illness, or faking it.

are you admitting you have the onset of a fake illness?

morning!

not feeling too tolerant today, I'm shattered and one of the idiots in my office is over-exaggerating his coughing and stuff in a really really annoying way.

twat.
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:38, Reply)

May I have a rant?
I've just been looking online for gig tickets and of course there's the ubiquitous booking fee to be added to the price. But in this case it's 10% of the ticket price.

I don't agree with booking fees in the first place, but surely their whole raison d'etre is to cover the admin costs of making the booking. So therefore it should be a flat fee if it's being charged at all. It costs the same to process a £50 ticket as it does a £40 one.

And anyway, if they want to add it, why not just add it to the cost of the ticket? It's just a bloody rip off.

/rant

Thank you for your patience as my spleen was vented.

Carry on.
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:52, Reply)

Vipros
Ahh I see. So waking up in the early hours with weird hot/cold sweaty shivers isn't man flu then?

In my experience, it tends to be those of the female persuasion who milk/fake illnesses. Maybe the man-flu term is a form of projection?
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:53, Reply)

Capt, that sounds geeky-ace!
*soothes Vipros*

*passes funnel*

*prepares Super-Strength Beechams Powders concoction*

*offers*

Edit: *and rubberduck*
(

Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:53, Reply)

rubberduck
if it is a real illness it's actual flu or something instead. the man part is a pejorative.

you are right about women milking/faking it though. it's just that men haven't come up with a term for it because they don't give a shit, whereas women like to complain ;-)

k2k6: I know what you mean about the booking fee. it bugs me when they add it onto to each ticket in an order as well.

admin for 1 or 10 is the same amount of work surely!
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:57, Reply)

@K2
What tickets are you looking for?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:58, Reply)

Morning!
Hello my lovelies! How are you all today? I'm in bed eating Rice Krispies straight out of the box. Only because Mr VP didn't have any milk. I'll have to go and do some shopping later, which is always a good excuse to buy sweets.
Woo! Friday!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 8:59, Reply)

*does the friday dance*
*wonders if he's stuck in 'actions' mode*
(

Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:01, Reply)

Morning all!
How is everyone today?

Think I'm coming down with this cold that everyone seems to have...
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:02, Reply)

Holiday at work
My boss is on holiday today, and my two lab colleagues are off sick with a)Man flu, and b) girly cold. Thus by default leaving me in charge of myself. Luckily I'm a dead liberal boss.

Which means I get to have most of the day playing on the net (still have to squeeze in several hour long breaks tho).

M'waahaahaa!!
(smells-like-victory-v's, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:05, Reply)

VictoryV
I like your style.

I am currently just sorting out a little work before I settle down to a South Park triple bill.

@D
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:06, Reply)

Yo all
Roll on 515.

I'm having a bed/sofa weekend. I shall only be getting up for food, fags and facility breaks!
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:08, Reply)

south park
@himjim

Nice one, I watched "Ladder to Heaven" (quite apt given the time frame) and "Child Abduction is not funny" (pesky mongolians) last night.

Have you come across www.watchtvsitcoms.com/southpark.php

not 100% reliable but most of the links work.
(smells-like-victory-v's, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:12, Reply)

TGB
That sounds like a weekend of awesomeness. I may have to copy your style.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:14, Reply)

My style is awesome
Although a weird conversation I was having last night ended up with the suggestion of a party where everyone is naked and covered in swarfega (non gritty)...
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:17, Reply)

Morninginginginginginginginging
...ningles

and so forth.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:20, Reply)

mmmm
swarfega
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:20, Reply)

Is that
the after-party of a huge group Marina maintenance session or something?

EDIT: I always used to use Swarfega, but Fairy liquid seems to do the job much better nowadays for some reason. Fairy's also full of win for cleaning gloss paintbrushes - it's a hell of a lot better than white spirit.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:20, Reply)

@Noel
Not only am I a massive Thunderbirds fan (as well as a fan of stingraaaaaay, stringray and Captain Scarlet) but Brian fucking Blessed is presenting it!!
(

Captain V, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:22, Reply)

Very droll Duckie
I wasn't actually the one that brought it up. Yes I talk to people even weirder than I :p
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:24, Reply)

TGB
I already knew that. You've talked to me for a start.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:25, Reply)

That's a very
valid point duckie. I agree with the fairy thing as well - it is the ultimate grease cutter througher! And smells nicer too.
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:28, Reply)

Rubberduck
thanks for the Fairy for gloss brushes tip

I was glossing some stuff yesterday and hadn't realised that, unlike the previous tin of paint, the new one wasn't water-based

didn't realise until I had squished the brush through my hand under the tap, liberally painting my palms white....

very annoying.
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:28, Reply)

*eats tumbleweed*
It's very quiet in b3taland recently.

*is suspicious*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:38, Reply)

I'd noticed that too
I'm starting to get concerned about the possibility that people have lives outside of existing on b3ta.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:41, Reply)

pft that is
just madness Duckie, there is nothing outside of b3ta. Nothing worth mentioning anyways :p
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:43, Reply)

@himjim
(from way up the page)

Jeff Wayne's War of the Worlds. Don't know where yet though.

Sorry, bit busy today. I'll be in and out.

*goes out again*
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:52, Reply)

Hey briefly k2k6
Hey Al, I'm all chocolate'd out, can we just go back to mud wrestling?
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 9:58, Reply)

K2
I might be able to pick up some tickets for that, I'll let you know.

CHOCOLATE SPEEEEEEEEEEEED!
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:00, Reply)

morning all!
and how are we today?

@k2k6 - yes, paying a booking fee for the privilege of buying your tickets online is a pain in the arse. but the venue and/or promoter will have to pay for the privilege of selling said tickets, and it depends on the website whether they pay a flat fee or, a percentage per transaction. it may also depend on the contract between the venue and the artist/manager, since they might be on a percentage or a guarantee. bigger names will be on a guarantee AND a percentage of the box office takings i.e. the venue will not make much money out of it, so they have to maximise their profit in any way they can.

/rant ends.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:02, Reply)

Ok well
can we have Nutella I reckon I could lick a bit of that.

That sounds weird and I have bizarre images of swarfega wrestling.
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:06, Reply)

Woo HLT is here!
*mexican waves*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:07, Reply)

Morning all
One week I am going to go an entire 5 days without coming in with a hangover.

A bacon sandwich and B3ta for me this morning I think.

Hope everyone is good.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:07, Reply)

Swafega
reminds me of my granddad, so that wouldn't work for me.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:11, Reply)

'lo miss badger, al!
*smooshes al*

*hugs badger*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:12, Reply)

hey Scarpe!
Well we could probably change it to fairy, it would have the added bonus of probably turning into a foam party half way through
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:18, Reply)

Morning all
It's bright and sunny here, and I'm sitting on a computer, it is next to a window though!

I have a day off so I'm lazing about watching movies.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:19, Reply)

Dok
Why wasn't I invited to your movie party? *looks sad*

*huggles HLT*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:21, Reply)

Morning HLT
I shall forgive you for ranting at me, seeing as how you have imparted some useful information and also know what you're talking about.

It's still a bugger though. And as I said, why not just hide it in the ticket price, especially if it's a percentage? It doesn't have to be hidden when it comes to divvying up the proceeds behind the scenes.

Perhaps part of this grievance comes from the fact I play at gigs where people pay a fiver at the door. Sometimes less... :)
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:21, Reply)

Badger *hugs and smooches*
Sorry I only decided yesterday, and you weren't on last night. you were talking to weird people.

But yay, come on down, What do you want to watch? I was thinking of watching the Pirates trilogy.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:24, Reply)

TGB
That would work better.

Especially I am one of the people that still has to giggle when I see the local fountain full of bubbles.

Despite it being like it *every* Saturday morning.

I'm a child.

But I am a child with a bacon sandwich, so i don't care.

nom.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:27, Reply)

yeah, we could, but then
you'd just ring up and say "Why, exactly, have I just had to pay £13.78 for this ticket? What an apparently random and stupid price!"

And I believe we're obliged to tell you what you're spending your money on.

Edit: and the ticket prices will be set by the promoter. any additional cost is, well, an addition, which naturally we don't want to absorb if we can pass it on to you, the unsuspecting punter. and if you're selling direct to the public from your own box office, you also don't want people buying online thinking "Why is it advertised at £13 yet I have to pay £15 (or whatever?".
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:28, Reply)

Scarpe
Bacon Sammich please.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:29, Reply)

I was on very sporadically...
you should have sent me a homing pigeon...

Pirates trilogy.. not a massive fan of the second one though.
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:29, Reply)

OK Sugar
I've a huge selection to pick from. Any preference of genre?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:31, Reply)

Hmm
Something I don't have to think much about! Ooh or the Bourne trilogy because that is awesomeness.

On a randomish side note my friend has started calling me Sammich which is weird and I dunno if I like it. Or if she is going to try and eat me *hides*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:34, Reply)

Hi al
I'm sitting at home watching movies.

Pah to ticket charges though. It's got so bad that even if you pick them up from the venue they still slap on a surcharge!

That just pisses me right off!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:35, Reply)

You'll be glad to know
that as a representative of the music industry our company is working on ways to make the whole process cheaper for fans.

Promoters charge more now because they get less money from album sales for some strange reason.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:35, Reply)

@ al
you've got me there, I don't know why they do that.

*theatre does not use ticketmaster*

*is proud*

edit: and we don't charge you extra if you want to pick 'em up. *is nice*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:37, Reply)

Badger
I've never seen any of those :(

Oh Sammich. Maybe I can eat you?

Excellent Tulip, that is great news. I should start going to the theatre more.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:38, Reply)

Dok
were you waggling your eyebrows as you said that?

And you can if you like ;) After the film though if we are watching Bourne I don't want to miss things :p
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:40, Reply)

Oh Ryanair!
That explains it!

They're a bunch of knobjockeys.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:40, Reply)

I don't want to eat TGB
nice as she is, I'd rather be able to play with her on here

and besides, i've just had a scone, and I don't want to spoil my appetite.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:42, Reply)

Not really
But I did raise one of them, a bit like Sean, my hero.

OK I'll contain myself till after the films. ;)
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:43, Reply)

Al
Do you just want a badge that says "I ate TGB and got 7.8" Because that's the score you are going to get regardless :p

I'm kinda hungry, I think there is quiche somewhere..
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:44, Reply)

lol al
7.8 no matter how good you are!

Doesn't that just burn.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:48, Reply)

*tries in vain to clean brain*
I read al's comment about eating TGB as if it included the word out....

I thought the drummer in my band the other said tha the was no longer going to eat his wife's beaver.

he said meals as she was threatening to poison him...
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:49, Reply)

I'm wearing jeans to work today
Feels very strange not wearing a suit.
What does everyone else wear to work?
(sirolimus, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:49, Reply)

Well I have high standards
I don't think anyone has got past a 7.8 before.

Vip it sounds like you just have oral sex on the brain
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:51, Reply)

@lots of people
@himjim - hmm, getting your hands on tickets eh? Count me in as interested!

@HLT - OK, I know theatres have to make money. I'll stop now.

@Al - I agree entirely. FlyBe are as bad. Flight cost £0.00 means £30 by the time you add on charges for government taxes, baggage, booking fee and credit/debit card fee. The last one really annoys me as they only accept credit or debit cards, so you have to pay at least one of the charges.

BMI are a bit better. They charge a fee for the flight, which is all inclusive, assuming you pay by debit card. It works out to about the same cost, but I'm happier to see the £35 charge or whatever listed as such, rather than being suckered in by some ridiculously cheap headline fare.

And I refuse to fly with Ryanair because I've heard what they're like.
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:52, Reply)

Vipros
you've got oral on the brain mate.

Charles I go to work every day in jeans and a T-shirt, and everybody else wears a suit. I like to be different.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:55, Reply)

Dok I've already said that :p
I am wearing jeans today as it is "Casual Friday"

Normally I make half an effort to look smart.
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 10:57, Reply)

I'm a scruffy so and so
I'm in trainers, faded jeans and a blue t-shirt that says 'I am a loner' on it.

And I haven't shaved in three weeks.

No one cares what we wear here.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:01, Reply)

@ al
Ooh, you hunky gay builder type you.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:02, Reply)

actually
could you just stand there and suck the air through your teeth in a "That's going to cost you at least four grand and a blowjob" kind of way?
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:06, Reply)

Village People al
Not an image I wanted in my head!

Badger, I didn't see that post, sorry, but I always look smart.

Scarpe, 3 weeks, good man. Join usssss!

Tulip, I see you've met a lot of builders.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:07, Reply)

Dok
Oh...I was going to shave in the morning.

Maybe I won't now then.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:09, Reply)

*admires Al's crotch patches*
Woo the boss has said I have to go on a walk to get everyone bacon and egg sarnies!
WOOOOOOOO
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:11, Reply)

@ althebuilder
can you fix it?
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:12, Reply)

Oh yes, so it is!
What a good builder you are.

Here, have some tea. Well, I say tea, I mean a cup of soggy sugar with a spoon in it.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:16, Reply)

Morning all...
How goes it on this oddly (but thankfully) sunny day?
(

jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:18, Reply)

It is going pretty well.
Pub lunch at 12, woo!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:26, Reply)

*sad*
I'm wanting an egg and bacon sammich now! But Ive got no eggs, and no shops near me that sell them.

Could you get me one as well Badger?

Althebuilder, can he fix it?
Althebuilder, no it's fucked!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:27, Reply)

it sucks
I have a headache and a 418 sheet of data tables to analyse and write up.

By 4pm.

I'm going to go to Forbidden Planet at lunch to cheer myself up.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:30, Reply)

Attack of the Nuns!
www.facebook.com/sharer.php?u=http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7707946.stm
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:30, Reply)

That was the best
bacon and egg sandwich ever. *happy glees*

Dok I'll have to get you one later, I don't think I can move right now..
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:34, Reply)

It's OK Badger
I'll just come over there and *nom* you then.

*Omnomnomnomnomnom*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:39, Reply)

Well
maybe not better than sex with Dok :p

But better than a lot of sex I have had and it lasted longer too...
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:40, Reply)

morning all.
there seems to be a lot of naughtyness this morning.

Is everyone slightly frustrated?
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:44, Reply)

I don't think you'd
fit in to them Al
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:44, Reply)

I am frustrated
yes. But only because my machine has broken down.

*cries with anguish*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:45, Reply)

*shimmies*
^
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:45, Reply)

Badger
Sex that lasts less time than it tales to eat a sammich is bad.

Al HLT hasn't worn those in a long time has she.

EDIT I type and Shimmies-in-Pants appears. Damn I'm good!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:45, Reply)

I'm very frustrated
So much so that I can't remember quite when it was that I was last not frustrated. Rats.
(

Captain V, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:46, Reply)

Dok
I guess it depends on how long it takes you to eat a sandwich.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:46, Reply)

There's always naughtiness on here, Lusty
You should know that by now!

But there does seem to be a bit more than usual, I'll admit.

Hmm.

*buttons lip about personal life in case Kaol's listening* :)
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:47, Reply)

Ok...
I've heard a lot about these little pinks shorts. In the words of many a b3tan... PHOTOS.
(

jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:48, Reply)

@ Herr Dok
I must've picked up the vibes.

*vibes*

I really want a sandwich now.

@k2k6, yes yes we all know you're getting loads at the moment...
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:48, Reply)

Hi Lusty
That depends on how hungery I am. Just now, about 30 seconds, I'm starving.

I have no excure for not eating anything I'm at home.

Oooo I think I'll watch Transformers now.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:49, Reply)

*enjoys shimmying*
Well I did eat the sandwich quite slowly as it was really good and I wanted to enjoy it for as long as possible... *daydreams about sandwich*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:49, Reply)

@ piston
Hmm.

No, I'm sure they look much better in your imagination...
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:53, Reply)

I've had enough
I'm going to make a sandwich.

*starves* *Snogs Badger*

That's so you don't miss me while I'm gone.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:53, Reply)

hello al.
I haven't had the best morning. I've had a bit of bad news.

But, the weekend is nearly here and I'm going on a treasure hunt tomorrow so yay!

How are you?
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:55, Reply)

@HLT
*says nothing*

*tries not to smile*

*fails*

*looks around for Kaol and fears for gonads*
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:56, Reply)

*huggles lusty*
Sorry to hear about the bad news. *offers cake*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:57, Reply)

*grins*
"*buttons lip about personal life in case Kaol's listening*"?
He is, as always :)
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:58, Reply)

*noms cake*
much better!

Thank you :)
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 11:59, Reply)

@k2k6
*raises eyebrow*

*giggles*

@lusty - sorry to hear you've had bad news. *hugs*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:00, Reply)

@ HLT
Crying shame... I have a shite imagination. Ah well. Mind you, I have noticed a disturbing fashion trend in women seemingly wearing nothing but a pair of what appear to be stockings in leiu of a pair of trousers.
(

jim_bob can herd cats., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:00, Reply)

Hello
Here at last - sorry I'm so late.
*hangs head in shame*
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:01, Reply)

Afternoon, Kaol
You may now reassume your board leadership. I've been keeping it warm for you.

@Lusty - sorry to hear that. *hugs*
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:02, Reply)

@Lusty
You're going on a freaking treasure hunt?!

*gives lusty a special hug*

*continues to nom cake*
(

Captain V, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:02, Reply)

Mr Nong everyone
Hiya,

I'm back in the office today which is a nice change this week! Also I have a new blackberry! Therefore I've spent the last hour fiddling about with it instead of doing any real work, and where is the first web site I visited? Here of course!
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:02, Reply)

Clendrix as punishment
I am afraid I am going to have to put you in the room full of fresh shaven men for 5 minutes.
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:03, Reply)

Thank you Mr. K.
But I'll be going again in a few minutes.
I've been to the hospital this morning, all done there, home now.
There's no point me going to work now though, as I'll get there at half twelve, and lunch is at one, so I'm gonna do some gaming!
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:05, Reply)

Badger!
That's just cruel!
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:06, Reply)

I'll be off in an hour or so
Who's next in the chain of command, Kaol?
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:07, Reply)

The treasure hunt was going to be in Regents Park.
But, as it looks like it's going to rain I think we're going to end up in a pub and turn it into a bit of a quiz. I'm organising it for my friend's birthday so I've been working my little socks off thinking of questions and wrapping sweeties and other things to use for lucky dip prizes.

I think I'm more excited than the birthday girl!
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:07, Reply)

Sorry Clendrix
Unless you have some chocolate in which to bribe me with...

OOOOH the train is cheaper than I thought it would be *plots* Some of you southerners may have to meet me finally! *evil glees*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:09, Reply)

Clendrix, of course!
I'm shocked that you even had to ask!
Anyway, I'm off to kill some Super Mutants now, so catch you folks about two.
*waves*
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:10, Reply)

Lusty,
knowing you and your generosity and creativeness, it's going to be brilliant wherever it is :)

Hurrah! I'm in charge!
K2k6, get those clothes off.
Badger, no shaven weirdos for me.
Everyone else, get feathers and tickle K2k6.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:10, Reply)

Hi to all the folks who have just turned up
I'm sad, I only had 1 slice of bacon left, so now I have a sad sandwich!

*hugs* Lusty, bad news, nooooooo. Do not want!

Badger, when are you looking at coming down?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:10, Reply)

aww thank you clendrix.
That's very sweet of you to say :)

Morning Billiam you sexual goose.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:13, Reply)

For Becky's
bash on the 28th. Lusty said I have to go which is a good enough reason..
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:13, Reply)

Bloody hell, clendrix
I'm not on a stag night or anything!

And much as I like to be without clothing, I feel that on this occasion I may be staying dressed...

*worries*
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:14, Reply)

I think that's the first time I've ever been called a sexual goose!
I think I quite like it.

*Runs round the office flaping arms making honking noises*

*Gets strange look from Sales Director*

*Stops*
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:16, Reply)

*pokes K2k6 with a stick*
Shame on you! Al would have stripped for me.

Bill! You're in danger of losing your Supreme Lurker title - you've got big competition from Wookiee and Kroney, you know.
But it is nice to see you more often :)
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:17, Reply)

@clendrix
Normally I would. But I'm worried at the prospect of excessive tickling!

In other news, you know how I'm always going on about not liking tattoos or piercings and so on? Well, I've at last found a tattoo which I quite like.

Look carefully...
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:20, Reply)

Bill!
*waves madly*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:20, Reply)

I received a gaz from a lurker the other day.
This is his/her profile. I was pretty impressed with the lurkerage!

a member for 5 years, 8 months and 9 days
has posted 135 messages on the main board
has posted 0 messages on the talk board
has posted 1 messages on the links board
(including 1 links)
They liked 1 pictures, 0 links, 0 talk posts, and 0 qotw answers.
send me a message
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:21, Reply)

Hurrah for Al and his persuadable nudery!
*happies*
*makes the most of it*
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:22, Reply)

Not thinking
about K2k6 naked!

Yay on Badger coming.

Thanks bill and Lusy, I now have the song Chantilly Lace stuck in my head!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:24, Reply)

@K2k6
That tattoo made me feel ill.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:28, Reply)

Thank you Dr Minge
I'd rather you didn't think of that particular image either.

@Lusty - I chuckled at it!

Edit@HLT - no it's not. I promise. You can poke me with your sharpest stick at the Edinbash if it is.
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:29, Reply)

@k2k6
it's a link to the horse thing, isn't it?

*suspiciouses*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:29, Reply)

Tulip
It's not. It's worse.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:30, Reply)

TGB
When I went to the last London bash, the train from Warwick cost the sum total of £10.

YAY for Chiltern e-tickets.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:32, Reply)

That Tattoo
is rather good. Not something I'd get done though!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:32, Reply)

@al
Nopes. It was actually a very lovely gaz to say they enjoyed one of my posts.
I haven't had a picture of a cock in a while now I think about it...
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:33, Reply)

Really Duckie?
Mine is coming out at £16.50 on national rail

Fancy keeping me company on the train? :p
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:34, Reply)

ew, it's horrid!
*sharpens stick for Edinburgh-based pokery*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:35, Reply)

Ahh why not?
The £5 single tickets can only be bought on Chiltern Rail's website. They've only got a few for each day, but £16.50 isn't shabby for a normal-price one.
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:38, Reply)

@al
that's fine, just wave it in my face instead of saying hello.

I'm not sure why this tattoo reminds me of bert.
www.eldred.ca/cheeps_toe.jpg

Quite probably NSFW.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:38, Reply)

That monkey tat is
so wrong!

What time where you thinking of heading down Duckie? I get lost in London and therefore should probably be with someone at all times 0_o
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:41, Reply)

Well
I finish work at 12 on a Friday, so I was planning to be on a 1pm-ish train.

Years of being skint and having mates in London means I'm rather handy in knowing my way around tube zone 1 on foot. OK, so depending on where you need to get to it might be an hour's walk, but I know the way :)
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:44, Reply)

Perhaps I'm thick
Or unnaturally attracted to clickies but I clicked on lusteh's link before reading about it being NSFW. Ach well.
(

Captain V, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:44, Reply)

That monkey one
is rather clever.

Not quite sure if it would do it for me at the appropriate time though...
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:48, Reply)

Oh al. That's really nice of you.
You don't have to go to that much trouble though.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:51, Reply)

I'm off now
And I've got a hectic weekend (no, not for that reason, unfortunately), so I'll see you all on Monday.
(

K2k6 has a proper job these days, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:53, Reply)

bye k2k6
*snogs*

*waves*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 12:56, Reply)

Has everyone gone with K2k6 then?
*is alone*

*crywanks*
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:20, Reply)

I'm here
I need Kaol's help.

*frowns*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:27, Reply)

Blimey!
It's really quiet on here today! Maybe we're all getting bored of b3ta. Maybe this is the end.

*sobs hysterically*

Oh! Hello himjim. Need Kaol's help? Maiming? Classifying reptiles? Giving excellent hugs? He's a man of many talents - I think he's coming back about 2pm.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:28, Reply)

I'm here!
Thinking I may see if I can get my hair cut tomorrow....
*haircut glees*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:30, Reply)

I'm back!
I've been to the supermarket and got heckled by some Polish builders. In Polish. And then they got annoyed that I didn't respond!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:31, Reply)

Clendrix!
Don't you ever talk like that!

*sobs*

I'd have to actually work if b3ta wasn't here. I don't want that to ever happen.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:31, Reply)

Murder.
Murder most extravagant. A sort of knife twistingly, tendon cutting fantasmagoria of pain.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:31, Reply)

Himjim
His most notable skill.
After hugs.

Lusty, forgive me - I was hysterical.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:32, Reply)

You're forgiven clendrix.
Because you're lovely.

*stops crywanking*
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:35, Reply)

I am having most of it chopped off Al
And I have managed to get an appointment tomorrow with my fav hairdresser WOOO!
who may be in Oxford but I don't like any of the places around here as much
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:36, Reply)

@Lucy
can you speak polish?

or was it all the hand gestures that gave it away?
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:39, Reply)

Indeed his most notable skill,
but he does give good handshakes and smokes decent cigarettes.

Do any of you work with absolute muppets? Sort of people who could quite easily fail an 11+ even though they have a degree?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:39, Reply)

^Tulip's gone berserk
On no she hasn't - she's edited herself back to sanity...

Himjim - most of my colleagues have higher degrees and are also mongs.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:40, Reply)

Tulip
No I can't, but I can recognise a leering builder when I see one. And when I turned to see who they were shouting at, then turned away again, they started shouting what sounded like cranky things.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:42, Reply)

hello everybody
I've just spent the last 2 hours rewriting someones attempt at a translation of a Letter of Credit. It was so utterly shit it was like it had been written by a handless blind German*.

*no disrespect to Germans (first nationality that came to my had), just that it was Spanish to English, and was so utterly bad.
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:43, Reply)

haha
everyone in the office has made me email them those tattoo pictures.

The monkey one went down rather well
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:45, Reply)

I haven't gone mad
Not yet anyway.

I hope you chastised them Lucy.

Naughty builders :(
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:48, Reply)

I swore
Quite loudly and marched back into the house, all haughty.

Now I think I'll sort Mr VPs room out as a surprise as he's just moved rooms and it's a bit of a state. I thought I'd be nice and do it!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:50, Reply)

TGB
This is the best worst tattoo I've ever seen. Always gives me teh lolz.

pontiphex.com/images/tattoo_fail.jpg
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:51, Reply)

@lusty
*cleans keyboard*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:52, Reply)

Lusty
That's bloody awful! Can you imagine seeing someone with that on their arm?

I saw someone on the Weakest Link with a sausage dog tattoo.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:53, Reply)

Holy crap
I'd cry if someone did that to me!
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:53, Reply)

Would you not check
that the person who was going to mark your body for life could actually draw first?
That fact that all of the teeth are drawn in is genius. It reminds me of how I used to draw when I was at school.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:55, Reply)

I like
The jowls effect. It's like the artist is imagining what the bride would look like in 30 years time.
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:57, Reply)

As sad as it is that Clendrix has gone somewhere,
You can stop crying, as I'm back.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:57, Reply)

*staggers in, sore and satisfied*
I'm here!

Just attempting to get my itunes library onto my new computer, so help me god.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 13:58, Reply)

@Clendrix
In an effort to keep my Supreme Lurker title I've waited 1 3/4 hours to reply, not that I was having a lunchtime drink with the sales team, no not at all! ;-)

In other news, I am still trying to decide if I should get a tattoo. Although I hasten to point out if I do it will be nothing like the ones above!
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:02, Reply)

also
the nose! the nose!

and the barbed wire in the hair! and the grey smears (although that might just be the dirty host)

Awful. Just awful.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:03, Reply)

Very impressive, Billiam!
You're still the winner.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:06, Reply)

Hello again
It's such a good day today, I've even been outside, granted it was to hang out my washing.

*hugs everybody*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:06, Reply)

Al
I can't say my tat hurt. I quite liked the feeling, rather soothing and I almost fell asleep.

But yeah bill If you can't make up your mind, don't get one. Remember it'll be on you for life!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:08, Reply)

*agrees with Al*
*is shocked*

But yeah if you're not sure then don't do it! And don't get one because you are 16 and your mum has expressly told you not to...
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:12, Reply)

Ouch
Yeah the spine is not the best of places for having no pain, not a lot of padding between the skin and bone.

Badger why are you shocked?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:13, Reply)

The spine, eh?
The ol' pain-rod, as it's called in medical circles.

I'm going to get a tattoo, just as soon as I get around to designing it.

*hugs al*
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:15, Reply)

*feels Al's bum
in a sympathetic way*
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:16, Reply)

The one on my wrist
probably hurt the most when he was doing the bit right above my veins on the inside. That was quite painful :(
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:16, Reply)

Old pain rod.
I like that, it makes me go all funny.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:17, Reply)

Pain?
*shrugs*

Can't really see it bothering me.

EDIT: Dok, not that rod.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:18, Reply)

Kaol
No not the naughty rod.

OK folks, what do you have tattood?

My next one will be a phoenix, when I decide on where to put it!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:21, Reply)

Hmm
Well I want a swallow on my other ribs and I want a mexican day of the dead skull on my leg and and and...
There are loads of things I want!

Like this, exp.bmezine.com/search/srch2004.exe?pic=tattoo/A70220/high/bmepb460079.jpg&tsect=tattoo/netos001.html&desc=SwallowFresh+close+up+of+my+new+swallow(Two+Dogs,+Earlstown,+UK)
And this
exp.bmezine.com/search/srch2004.exe?pic=tattoo/A61121/high/bmepb395745.jpg&tsect=tattoo/skull001.html&desc=Dia+de+los+MuertosSugar+Skull(by+Isaiah,+Staring+Without+Caring,+Tucson,+Az)
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:25, Reply)

Mine is gonna be
An Ouroboros.
As soon as I get 'round to drawing it.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:25, Reply)

I'm going to get a picture of Kaol Black
on my leg.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:26, Reply)

Hahaha!
You certainly should.
It'd be awesome!
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:27, Reply)

I have a teeny
phoenix on my wrist.

I want another one on my other wrist but not really sure what. *looks at more designs for ideas*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:27, Reply)

I almost got
an Ouroboros though. It was a little more dragon than snake looking though.
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:30, Reply)

I could never get a tatoo
I buy T-shirts and then a week later I wonder what the hell I was thinking.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:30, Reply)

That swallow is great.
Ouroboros would be fantastic.

All the WIN on phoenix.

I'lll probally get mine on my left shoulder/upper arm.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:31, Reply)

I know what and where
I want a Triforce between my shoulder blades:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Triforce#Triforce

I just need to -
A - Find a decent design
B - Get over my fear of pain on the "The ol' pain-rod"
C - Get over my 20+ years of conditioning by parents that they'll hate me if I "Scar my body like that"
D - Have someone to help me look after it for the initial period as it'll be hard for me to reach to do the creams and stuff
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:34, Reply)

Bill, if you find a design you like
Or a few along the right lines, I'll do something with 'em for you.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:36, Reply)

Bill
I'll look after you!
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:38, Reply)

ooh triforce tattoo
brought up this little hottie
hongkongphooey.files.wordpress.com/2006/10/tattoo.jpg
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:39, Reply)

So just watched Transformers
What next?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:42, Reply)

Dok,
What're the options for other films?
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:45, Reply)

Name one
And I'll tell you if I have it.

Mainly Sci-Fi and Horror, but I have a few others as well.

But Badger it wasn't the tat you were looking at!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:48, Reply)

Dok
No films for you. Walk to the shops, buy an apple and go for a stroll around the park.
(

thealternativefact, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:49, Reply)

A girl at work has
brought in some cakes as it is her birthday today.

it amounted to around 30ish little cakes and one big one, of which around half are still left.

She has said I can take them home *glees*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:49, Reply)

The Host?
I watched that last night, fun!

Er...

Seven.
Escape From New York.
Predator.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:51, Reply)

Dok
I may have been looking at the tattoo. I did look at it for a little bit....
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:55, Reply)

Red
I demand cakey goodness.

Kaol, got them, and I thought that you would give me a bit of a challenge.

Badger, don't you mean a big bit? *snuggle*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 14:57, Reply)

Ok Dok...
A challenge?

John Carpenter's Vampires: Los Muertos
Dance Of The Dwarves
Cannibal Ferox
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:00, Reply)

I dunno Dok
I get confused very easily :D

woo snuggles *sly gropes*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:02, Reply)

Aww Herr
I'll save you a piece *wink*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:03, Reply)

Thanks Red
Badger, I don't believe you. *runs nails gently down spine* *snog*

Kaol, not bad, I don't have Dance Of The Dwarves.

EDIT Damnit I've stuck The The - Infected in my head now!

*sings*

I followed that bead of sweat
To the small of your back from the nape of your neck.
Lighting it up, with every drag upon my cigarette.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:16, Reply)

Oh dear...
That means that you own a film that has Bon Jovi as the lead actor...
Me too :(

Dance of the Dwarfs is so, so bad. Have you seen it?
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:19, Reply)

Dok you tease!
Oh my god I may have to go have a moment somewhere private *runs off*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:20, Reply)

How rude of me!
I didn't spot your traditional greeting earilier TGB.

Hello TGB!
*Waves Madly Back*
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:23, Reply)

Kaol
No I haven't seen it, but just by the title I can tell it's bad!

Badger, "A private moment" well can I come?
*caress thigh*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:24, Reply)

It's about midgets,
In a jungle.
And they actually turn out to be lizard-monsters.
Who kill people.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:27, Reply)

It's fine Bill
I wasn't that upset

*cries*

If you like Dok ;)
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:27, Reply)

My god Kaol
you watched that! I can't say anything I own Jack Frost and Jack Frost 2 (the horrors, not the family one)

Badger *hugs* Did that bad bill upset you.

Bad bill, no biscuits!

Woo Hoo *Snogs*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:30, Reply)

Yeah,
I watched it all.
*sighs*

The glistening sweetcorns in my crown of horror-film shit, however are "Mutant" and "The Howling VI: The Freaks".

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mutant_(film)
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Howling_6:_The_Freaks
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:33, Reply)

That's a lovely turn of phrase Kaol
And don't deprive Bill of biscuits Dok, I don't think he deserves that level of retribution!

*snogs back*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:37, Reply)

Earlier on
I said that I had 400 pages of data and survey results to analyse and write up by 4pm.

It's twenty to four.

I am on page 96.

Today is not going well.

Just wanted to vent.

As you were peeps, nothing to see here.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:39, Reply)

Kaol The howling 4 is great!
OK Badger, I won't stop bills biscuits.

Here bill, have some cakey goodness.

Scarpe, have some cake.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:40, Reply)

Scarpe
is there any chance the last 304 pages are mostly blank?
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:41, Reply)

It's OK Dok
I don't need you biscuits, I've got 2 ginger nuts and a 1/4 bottle of wine left over from the Eurostar yesterday; I've decided to call it my office party for one kit!
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:42, Reply)

Ooh, cake. Thanks
TGB: *looks*, *sees no blank*, *sighs*

Oh well, what can't be done can't be done.
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:43, Reply)

Sorry Badger
I now must confiscate bills biscuits!

Bill I'll take those ginger nuts.

They are the finest of the biscuits, and shouldn not be wasted with wine!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:44, Reply)

Ginger nuts
are pretty damn awesome.

*steals biscuit*
*noms*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:55, Reply)

'Noon all...
How are the beards coming along gents?

Are you ladies rigorously training to judge the beards?

I say Xmas eve is beard cut off day and all evidence must be posted for inspection.
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 15:59, Reply)

Hey Colonel S
Are you getting very excited about the beard competition? Are you beard gleeing?
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:01, Reply)

There's a beard-growing contest?
Oh!
When was this decided?

I'm down for this.
*grows*
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:02, Reply)

My Biscuits!
:-(

You stole all my biscuits! Now I'm biscuitless!
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:02, Reply)

Colonel
I'm not going to cut mine at all. I will tidy it up a bit though.

Badger, I'll get some for the bash then.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:03, Reply)

*waves*
Hey TGB. I'm pant-wettingly excited about the beard growing, mainly because my face will be warm and I look like wolverine* when I'm hairy.

*Teenwolf*

*sads*
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:04, Reply)

Beards!
I'm now at the three week mark where it starts to get a bit scruffy and ginger, I'm considering shaving Sunday if I can be bothered.
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:07, Reply)

haha office lol@teenwolf
Yeah Kaol if you weren't off gallivanting you would have been award of the B3ta Beard Off 2008.

It's a highly contested competition possibly
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:07, Reply)

I can't actually grow an inpressive one
So I'll be in the running for "Most Homeless".
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:08, Reply)

For those wishing to take part, I say the rules are as follows:
1. NO Trimming

2. Edges may be tidied/straightened to provide beard/skin contrast and to conform to acceptable job standards (without my boss calling me a tramp)

3. No mascara

4. GROW GROW GROW!
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:09, Reply)

But Badger
I have a proper beard as well you know, I just don't know what to do with it!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:10, Reply)

oh, and
5. Profit!
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:10, Reply)

Colonel
What about dyeing it?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:10, Reply)

Hmmm...
I assume any upper lip growth can be removed.
I look like a kiddie-fiddler if I have a 'tash.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:11, Reply)

*rubs dok's beard*
*glees*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:12, Reply)

woah, woah WOAH!
Hang on, this is turning into a bloody minefield. I wish I hadn't started to organise this now.

- Dyeing is only allowed if using an unnatural coloured dye (green/purple etc)

- Moustachio's can be removed under the 'Edge Tidying Act 2008 1.2'

Anyone else want split hairs?!
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:15, Reply)

My beard sense was tingling
and I find myself in this strange new world.
*awes*
(

Fetid Mimsy Bouncing Back!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:16, Reply)

Colonel you love it
stop your complaining.

We should put it in the calendar and people can join up so we can see who is playing *glees more*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:18, Reply)

*High five's Mimsy*

(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:18, Reply)

TGB
That's an ace idea!
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:20, Reply)

I dunno
what to call you Fetid! Calling you Mimsy seems weird!
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:22, Reply)

*High fives back*
I've never high fived an officer before
*glees*
(

Fetid Mimsy Bouncing Back!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:22, Reply)

Hi Mimsy
How about Deep Purple, so that it matches my hair?

Minefield, never.

Oh Badger, you can rub and stroke my beard all you want. *snuggles* *Tickles with beard*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:23, Reply)

I shall enter
your so called "Beard Competition".

I shall neaten the edges and grow like a 13 year old boy on protein shakes.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:23, Reply)

And so shall I
I also suggest that we have a catagory for those who are unable to grow one.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:25, Reply)

TGB
You could go with Archduke Reginald de Haversy-Smythe-Winterton for simplicity but most just go with Fetid :)

And hi Doktor.
(

Fetid Mimsy Bouncing Back!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:26, Reply)

Can we have
a ginger beards category?
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:26, Reply)

I fail at growing beards
*shrugs*

I'll still give it a go.

Also, I heard that old engine-oil is an excellent follicle stimulator.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:26, Reply)

tada!
www.b3ta.com/calendar/event/17197
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:27, Reply)

Kaol
That'll explain my hairy palms then...
(

rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:28, Reply)

Fucking yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
The overseer has just left for two weeks holiday.

Two whole weeks without having to listen to her talk about her vagina!

Two whole weeks without Magic FM!

Two whole weeks without the heating on!

I'm so happy I could weep.
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:29, Reply)

Engine oil Kaol
Now where could I get my hands on some of that?

Oh Badger, whan are you working on your car next?

EDIT Oh Lusty, that is great. *hugs*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:29, Reply)

hmmm
beard-growing eh?

I think I shall enter, for now. Whether I still have a beard by xmas eve remains to be seen.

And I second the tache removal. I don't like having to wipe it every time I take a drink.

GO BEARD!
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:34, Reply)

Not any time
soon dok it's too cold *brrrrs*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:37, Reply)

Damn
I've just remembered that I'm supposed to be going to my sisters tonight to blow the sky up.

This means I'm going to have to put some clothes on, and make myself look respectable.

Boo *sad* why can't I stay here with you all?

Badger, Boo, *snuggle*
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:38, Reply)

I can't believe you are
choosing the real world over us dok. *sads*
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:43, Reply)

did someone mention beard growing?
what if some of us already have 3 or 4 inches of beard to start with?
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:43, Reply)

TGB!

There ARE blank pages!

Well, to all intents and purposes. There's sheet after sheet about brands that the base size is too low to report on, so I can ignore them.

I'm up to page 250 now.

Yay!
(

scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:44, Reply)

I'm tempted to get some fireworks on my way home,
For misc fun.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:44, Reply)

Oh Badger
Don't be sad, I'll come back you know!

*huggles the sad away*

Vipros, you cheat you, not really. Hi.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:46, Reply)

Vipros - You've blown your cover now...
We all know you're planning on getting a little tricksy!

NB: Maximum start length of beard is a 'hair clippers number 2'.
(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:46, Reply)

pffft
funk that. Keeping my beard as it is is far more important than winning a competition.
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:48, Reply)

@ Colonel Santiago
I love how seriously you're taking this.

You are my hero!
(

wanderlust, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:48, Reply)

Kaol
Blowing up the sky is always good for a laugh! I try to aim for planes!

Colonel, that's BAD because I trim mine with a No. 3.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:49, Reply)

Dok...
I live on the main approach-path to Stansted :D

If I do hit a plane, I'm keeping it.
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:51, Reply)

Go for it Kaol
I live under the holding pattern for Gatwick, and my sister lives near Biggin Hill.

I can see the news reports now!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:52, Reply)

Later everyone
Hometime for me!

Have fun everyone, see ya later!
(bill, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:55, Reply)

Cya Bill
Have a good trip home.

In other news I now have cloths on!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:57, Reply)

I need to find a shop on the way home
That sells whisky AND fireworks.

*thinks*

Right, I'm going now, have a good weekend everyone!

*runs*
(

Cawl, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 16:59, Reply)

Kaol
See you soon!

Bye!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:07, Reply)

You have cloths on?
I'm home WOOOOO!

Colonel we may have to have two categories for those under a no2 and those over :p
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:11, Reply)

Yes Badger
I've been having a Pj day. *snuggles*

EDIT I don't want to go, but if I don't my sis and her kids will be upset at me, and there's free food and drink! But I'd still rather stay here with you lot.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:12, Reply)

You know
it's clothes right? ;)

Have fun! I'll try not to pine too much!
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:24, Reply)

Yes Badger
I just noticed that, I even got it right earlier!

My mind is slipping! It must be the thought of being without you tonight!

Anyhoo are you not out for a meal tonight?

And so you don't pine away have *hug snuggle grope snog sensual massage* That should keep you going.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:26, Reply)

No I am going to stay in
and teach myself how to attach text to paths in Macromedia Fireworks so I can have curvy text!

This is easier said than done...
(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:32, Reply)

right,
having not been around for a while, I'm now going home to freeze gin and make cake

*snogs*
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 17:44, Reply)

Ningles all
Can I be a judge too please? I like beards.
I had one in a box and everything.
Does that qualify me?

EDIT: I haz a BADGE! :D
(

warmfuzzies Isn't here, Fri 7 Nov 2008, 18:08, Reply)

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