If pigs could lay eggs,
we wouldn't need any other animals.

(Although I'm not sure how good pig cheese would taste - probably a little sow-er. Sorry.)

What would you like to cross breed and why?
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:38, 56 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

TGB
and a real woman
(Bert's other profile wants to wear your balls on a necklace, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:40, Reply)

*puts the popcorn in the microwave*

(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:42, Reply)

Bert and a monkey.
Oops!

Already been done.
( girlinthehole, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:42, Reply)

*pulls up a chair and gets a bowl to share with Mr Oli*
Katherine Heigl and chocolate.

My heaven.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:44, Reply)

He was a particularly cheeky monkey at that

(Bert's other profile wants to wear your balls on a necklace, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:44, Reply)

great white sharks
and horses...then the mounted police could just eat all the protesters they didn't like and that would be very funny to watch on utube but prob wouldn't do much for their reputation...
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:47, Reply)

Marijuana and hops
Do I really need to tell you why?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:51, Reply)

The german equivalent of jack-of-all-trades
Literally translates as "egg-laying woolly milk sow". Those wacky germans!
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:55, Reply)

ppd!
What you doing here?

I'd cross Bert and a big pile of wit so maybe he'd actually become funny
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 13:55, Reply)

We've been flirting for so long now, TGB
When are you going to succumb to those feelings you have for me? When are you going to drop the act, take one look at my 'boyishly good-looking' face, and pounce on me like a panther that's just got out of a washing machine? (as in dripping wet)

Come on, be my next victim.
(Bert's other profile wants to wear your balls on a necklace, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:00, Reply)

I'd rather have
sex with Jade Goody's corpse
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:02, Reply)

Ooo Hello PPD!
I'd cross apples with cucumbers, and produce a tasty snack that takes more calories to consume than it actually gives you.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:02, Reply)

Labs &
Badger...
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:11, Reply)

ppd
have we met? I think not? *hugs* Nice to meet you.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:12, Reply)

i'm a waif
I only pop in now and again...
Hello
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:13, Reply)

I like waifs
I also like fluffeh cunts and bumnuts.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:15, Reply)

And you were at the badger birthday bash
Drawing on Captain V as I recall.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:16, Reply)

But where would I get steak?

( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:17, Reply)

You recall correct TLiC
And I beat her in an arm-wrestling comp, despite her cheating!

she beat me when I used my left arm though...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:19, Reply)

My computer tells me that
A piece of harded exrement, that clings to the hair around ones anus. Some bumnuts cling to the hair so well that removing them can rip the hair out from the root which can be painful.

You learn something everyday!
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:21, Reply)

Caaaaatface
hehe next day me, bill and Kaol smoking outside as this strange dressing gown clad catface ambles out. heheh
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:22, Reply)

I didn't cheat!
Anyway, I beat someone...who was it?
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:22, Reply)

You probably beat Catain V
His catty arms would be weak and fragile.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:23, Reply)

I found a picture of said arm
restle...clearly...no cheating
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:23, Reply)

haha
V would so fail at any kind of physcial competition! And now he has a thpeach impediment too
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:24, Reply)

captain V it was!
NEWS FLASH Girl beats catface
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:25, Reply)

also defined as
bumnut
A bald person. One who has a head resembling a bum.
Who are you calling baldie, you bumnut.
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:27, Reply)

Awh, poor, poor Catface.
That night ruined him.
( Cawl, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:29, Reply)

Hi Kaol
I like your story about feeding mice to your housemate....I use to keep snakes and an Iguana called fred...they had real live baby mice to eat...i think my mother was trying to teach me something...never be the mouse!
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:33, Reply)

He needed that night
We made him a woman that night.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:33, Reply)

I think Kaol
probably added to the physcological scars later. I went to bed when we got back so who knows what they got up to...
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:35, Reply)

Thanks!
I need to get some locusts on the way home tonight, that reminds me.

Is the iguana still about, or did it get fuckin' mahoooosive?
( Cawl, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:35, Reply)

I heard that 'docking' may have happened

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:35, Reply)

He lived under the stairs
he was about 3 ft long when he died, he was very cool
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Lies!
...

Maybe...

EDIT: 3 foot? Not too bad then! Some of 'em get to 6!
( Cawl, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:38, Reply)

Please please
say no docking happened on the sofa
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:39, Reply)

My computer tells me that
docking - 24 definitions - The act of placing the head of ones penis inside the foreskin of another's penis.
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:39, Reply)

Your computer
is getting a good work out today! Look up felching whilst you're at it :p
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:41, Reply)

I want a penis to dock
sounds fun for the docker!
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:41, Reply)

TGB
JUST FOR YOU
Felching is a sexual practice in which semen or other fluids are sucked out of the anus of a partner. The semen has been ejaculated into the rectum via anal ...
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:43, Reply)

It wasn't for me
but I can now relive the look on Tourette's face hehehe!

What time you working till today?
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:43, Reply)

I'n not at work
I haven't been myself so i'm at home in bed resting my bones
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:44, Reply)

Who were you being insead?
Awww the apprentice is on later though yay!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:46, Reply)

I have a penis, but don't want to try docking
If I had a vagina I'd totally try bumping squids though!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:46, Reply)

some crazy lady in a dressing gown
grumbling around the house with wet hair and no pants on!
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:49, Reply)

Damn had you told me that earlier
I'd have come over at lunch :p
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:50, Reply)

Bumping squids
All my trusty computer tells me is that its got something to do with motorbikes...i think that must be wrong...I'm guessing that a lot of leg parting would be important in this girl on girl adventure playground!
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:52, Reply)

There was no docking
On your sofa, I promise.

Your kitchen, on the other hand...
( Cawl, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:52, Reply)

I didn't want to bother anyone and
and my dressing gown needs washing...it smells like hamster
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:53, Reply)

Kaol: on = in ;)
Bumping squids does involve leg parting, i believe its also called 'scissoring'.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:53, Reply)

tribbing
Woo!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:54, Reply)

scissoring
www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPhMTdQwiao
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:56, Reply)

As I'm at work
I know I shouldn't click that link but my curiousity as to waht it actually is is strong. I am kinda hoping for people cutting stuff out with those craft scissors with the zig zag edges
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 14:58, Reply)

Well this is an education
Tribadism or tribbing, also known by the slang term scissoring, is a form of non-penetrative sex in which a woman rubs her vulva against her partner's body ...
....

and i thought my friend was just being friendly...you live and learn
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 15:01, Reply)

click the link!
'touching tacos' you know you want to...just click it!
(ppd, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 15:05, Reply)

I'll click it later :p

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 29 Apr 2009, 15:12, Reply)