This is 111% trufax and anyone who says otherwise is a virgin and a cunt.
I was shagging this well fit supermodel and she wanted to do a bit of dp. Well, I don't keep no motherfucking dildos or any of that shit in the mansion as I'm not some sort of gay. Well, she kept pestering me as I penetrated her with my penis and it was getting well annoying so I did what any man would do.

I shat in a condom and froze it. Yes, that's right you cunts, while shagging her I shat into a condom and froze it before sticking it up her arse. She fucking loved every moment of it. In fact she loved it so much that when I'd dun my cum in her fanny she shoved the poodildo up her clunge while I screamed SHITCUNT in her face.

Unless you're a virgin or something you should try this with your boyfriend, you bunch of fucking bumcunts.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 7:47, 22 replies)

Wow,
you really have been in prison haven't you?
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 22 May 2012, 8:36, closed)

VIRGIN!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 8:39, closed)

You are the embodiment of Jay from the Inbetweeners
AICM$5P
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Tue 22 May 2012, 8:42, closed)

CUNT!!!

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 8:45, closed)

Ponies are versatile animals.
Many can learn well over one trick.
( .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Tue 22 May 2012, 8:55, closed)

you fuck ponies?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 10:00, closed)

Best of all the animals!

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 22 May 2012, 10:24, closed)

Hahahahahahahha

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 22 May 2012, 12:30, closed)

Another day in the life
of Mr Tickle.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 22 May 2012, 9:06, closed)

I once saw a woman poo herself in a supermarket,

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 22 May 2012, 9:19, closed)

did she freeze it and then use it as a dildo?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 10:02, closed)

Kroney, give MMPS his login back

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Tue 22 May 2012, 9:59, closed)

How long?
Did it take to freeze
(Samantha Bricks Better half done a poo on, Tue 22 May 2012, 10:39, closed)

seconds, I used liquid nitrogen.
christ, what are you, some kind of VIRGIN? have you never done poodildo before?
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 12:04, closed)

When the time comes
to thaw it out, you could use defrost on a microwave but better results are obtained by submerging it in a saucepan of water and putting it on a hob on the lowest setting.
(judgetheobscure used to sweep in butchers' shops., Tue 22 May 2012, 11:25, closed)

it melted in her cunt.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Tue 22 May 2012, 12:04, closed)

I don't go a lot on this new advertising campaign for Max The Lion

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 22 May 2012, 12:07, closed)

Can I borrow it?

(yourmumonastickwithmintsauce, Tue 22 May 2012, 22:07, closed)

make your own, gayster.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 0:05, closed)

Wow.
Finally something worth wanking over.
(The Curse of Millhaven. Pretty little mouth underneath all the foaming, Tue 22 May 2012, 23:31, closed)

hilarious.
great post!
(Fothermucker, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:28, closed)

are you just bitter cause your cunt scabbed over?

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:32, closed)