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This is a question Sporting Woe

In which we ask a bunch of pasty-faced shut-ins about their exploits on the sports field. How bad was it for you?

Thanks to scarpe for the suggestion.

(, Thu 19 Apr 2012, 13:40)
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I have been searching for
but failing to find, any evidence for the rule that says if you're good at sports then you must be a meathead, and vice-versa.

This seems to be the generally accepted rule on here, and it is frankly bollocks.

Whilst everyone has a story about being some sporting misadventure, I don't see why it's acceptable to admit to being completely unfit and incoordinated any more than it is to be unable to read properly or understand basic science.

And if you are shit at sports, stop whingeing about the kids who were good at it, or how the PE teacher was always a cunt.

I know the question jokes about us being pasty faced shut-ins, but fuck's sake, tell a story without blaming someone else.

Right, so having foolishly whinged on an internet forum, I await some righteous abuse.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 13:29, 57 replies)
Ooooh,..
you big silly face
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 13:30, closed)
with great power comes great responsibility
up to six regular posters just tore ligaments trying to type a pithy response to that jibe, and two actually died.
trolling ruins lives.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 13:54, closed)
Ha!
The thing is, I wasn't trying to troll. Rather than just sitting there like I normally do, I made the mistake of offering up my *actual* opinion.

Fool.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 13:59, closed)
never let the mask slip
we all know there's no real people on here. keep it that way.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 13:59, closed)
That's what "trolling" means round here.

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 18:57, closed)
This is all anecdotal
but from experience, people who are very intelligent do seem to be bad at sport. Of course there are exceptions, there are to everything! I was in the top set for *everything* at school apart from PE, for which I was in the bottom set. I honestly have no good excuse for this other than that I am extremely clumsy, skinny but with large breasts and bad balance. This rules you out of most things. When I was at Sussex all the sports teams resigned themselves to losing to Brighton in the varsity because we were the academic uni and therefore bad at sport. Now I'm at Cambridge I've stumbled across a few people who are intelligent AND good at sport, but I just think they're weird...
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 14:05, closed)
This is, of course, clearly horsehit.

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 14:08, closed)
Which bit?
Or the general point? Cos I agree that yes, intelligence and sportiness aren't mutually exclusive, I just seem to meet people who are one or the other!

And we never hit horses.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 14:13, closed)
I bet you do, you beat them and beat them. I know your type...

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 14:14, closed)
Yep
when I say I'm a "researcher" I actually mean "horse beater".
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 14:16, closed)
You lost me at 'large breasts'.

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:26, closed)
I see what you've done there
You've tried to throw me off my argument with the line 'skinny but with big breasts'.

Where was I again?
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:28, closed)
Mwahahaha
My evil plan worked!!!

I did think about not including them but it is true, they do make playing a LOT of sport more difficult if not impossible. They're a valid excuse ;)
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:48, closed)
Good. Lesson learnt then.
Now put on this bikini, go over to the corner, jump up and down a bit and have a good think about what you've done. Think!
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 23:32, closed)
You are a girl, aren't you?
'cos if not, there could be a few people feeling a bit ashamed of themselves now...
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 10:01, closed)

I coach one of the Cambridge sports clubs and they are a fair mix of abilities and intelligence..common sense is more of an issue with some of them!
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 13:13, closed)
You make a good point, except....
All the PE teachers I've ever had / met *were* cunts. Sadistic psychopaths with poor interpersonal skills and a chip on their shoulder.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 15:06, closed)
Fair enough
I've never met your PE teachers, but I know that the one at my school was a top, top bloke.

Saying that, I was always suspicious of the breed because of Mr Baxter off Grange Hill.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:49, closed)
Listen,
there's nothing wrong with liking Linux. Be proud.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 15:14, closed)
Oi!

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 21:47, closed)

Yes. This is why a premiership footballer and Stephen Hawking are, in most cases, entirely interchangeable.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 15:25, closed)
Most of Stephen Hawking is entirely interchangeable.

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 15:40, closed)
What a ridiculous argument.

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 15:41, closed)

Hyperbole often is. If you would prefer facts and figures, you could analyse academic achievement across top-tier sportsmen, and perform similar analysis of the sporting achievements gained by top-tier scientists, comparing both with a control group of average Joes. I would certainly be interested in reading your Powerpoint presentation on the subject.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:08, closed)
I'll work on it while I'm playing Tennis tonight.

(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:16, closed)
Anyway, to disprove your point,
if intelligence and sporting prowess are so rarely found in the same people, how come only the two best Universities in the country ever get to the final of The Boat Race, huh smarty pants?
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:17, closed)

It's a result of early streaming.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:28, closed)
Yes, but...
they are often joint last at the Violence World Championships.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:30, closed)
Because
Oxbridge let in professional rowers to do a Masters in "Land Economy" and then just use them for the boat race. Duh.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:50, closed)
Yet 1 guy out for his constitutional swim
manages to stop 'em dead.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 21:49, closed)
I'd imagine you are/were good at sports, so I'll try and explain
The main problem is the competetive nature of sports. Imagine if every English lesson or chemistry lesson involved dividing the class into halves and having a quiz which most involved took pretty seriously. If you were no good at those subjects you'd be jeered at and abused by your fellow pupils, accused of not trying, let the side down etc. Every single fucking time. Of course if you were good at the subject you'd love it - regularly looking good in front of your mates, loads of approval from the teachers. Do you start to see now?
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 16:54, closed)
Look,
you don't have to "explain", I get it.

It's a fair comment to make about not everyone being ultra competitive at sport; fine. My issue was more about the acceptance of being useless at one aspect of life but not another. Now I can't speak for you, but when I was at school, people got laughed at for being shit at English or science too. Never seen a classroom laugh at the kid who can't read the text of Shakespeare they're studying out loud properly? Kids eh, they're cunts.

I now work in IT and finance. Have you seen a bunch of IT geeks together? They're just as competitive and judgemental as any sporty types (although admittedly they're less likely to try and give you a wedgie). There is almost always some degree of people mocking the inferiority (perceived or otherwise) of others.

My point is just that it seems generally acceptable on here to not like sport, but not to dislike more academic endeavours. Just look at the grammar pedantry that goes on.

And to confirm your assumption, yes, I was pretty good at sport, but not a jock, but I was also a 'geek' to the cool kids and have a science PhD. Not that it matters.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:04, closed)
Everyone on here
lives in their mother's basement, that's why.

What was your PhD in? I'm currently in the second year of mine in chemistry. (From one geek to another...)
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:46, closed)
There's no space left
in my mother's basement. it's where I keep small children in cages.

I was actually a chemist at first as an undergrad (at Cambridge too), then ended up as a geologist (application of thermodynamics to mineral equilibria dontcha know).

What's your area of research?
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:59, closed)
15 years on
Im still "doing" mine (also in Chemistry). I think my field might have moved on a bit since I was lastin the department.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 19:10, closed)
I hate to be the bearer of bad news
but if you're 15 years into a PhD you failed it 5 years ago. At least in the UK.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 10:01, closed)
All this PhD backslapping
reminded me of this.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 23:38, closed)

Hab SoSlI' Quch!
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 0:06, closed)
Fuck!
Just spent nearly halfa on google translate and online klingon translators.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 0:31, closed)

Must we all be good at art, philosophy, music, and pig-wrangling too? One of Da Vinci's proudest accomplishments was his ability to bend an iron bar with his hands, true - but the idea of "Renaissance Man" fell out of favour when specialization became more or less mandatory in order to advance.

I was a County level sprinter, and have an MSc. Not that it matters. I'm far more satisfied with the MSc than with a (largely abandoned) ability to run at above average speed for short periods of time - and as for the rest of sport, premiership and whatnot - I couldn't give one single fuck less.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 18:12, closed)
they didn't offer pig wrangling as a choice at my school
otherwise, I'd have gone for it. as a general 'life skill', I'd rank it higher than basketball
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 22:42, closed)

They did, but it was called "the disco".
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 0:03, closed)
Zing!

(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 0:16, closed)
How many research scientists have multi-million dollar sponsorship deals with lab-coat manufacturers?
So society in general places great emphasis on traits that may not as a species race us further up the evolutionary ladder.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 21:54, closed)
because there's a metric fuckton of keyboard warriors in here.
And keyboard warriors find it very hard to find time to devote to an actual outside pursuit, after all, somewhere, somebody is wrong, on the internet.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 10:03, closed)
This is exactly it
I loved the academic subjects I did at school *because* I was good at them and hated the humiliation that was trying to do sports, especially knowing that I was good at other stuff. I'm only now just about managing to enjoy exercise because I've found things that aren't competitive like yoga and ballroom dancing and other people of all abilities do them for fun too and nobody cares if you're no good. (I'm no good.)
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:06, closed)
Pff
Ballroom dancing non-competitive? I've seen Strictly Ballroom. They're bastards.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:31, closed)
Ok, so they have "dancesport" classes
I go to the "social" dance classes (for the people not good enough to compete). And Strictly Ballroom is *hilarious*.

I have been told by friends that competitive yoga exists too. I'm not sure I believe them.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:43, closed)
I can well believe it
Every time I go I get told not to do the 'difficult' moves (on account me being useless), whilst being observed mockingly by middle-aged women. The competitive bitches.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 17:51, closed)
Two things
First of all, it's a matter of time management. The astonishing levels of commitment needed to be even a little bit good at a local level can be enormous. The 14+ year olds in my local swimming club train ten times a week. Very few people can do that and achieve anything worthwhile academically as well.

Secondly, it's a matter of priorities. The sort of person who thinks it's worth working hard for years to make it into rocket scientist school is unlikely to be the sort of person who thinks it's worth expending the same effort learning how to swim relatively short distances very slightly faster than the current group of people of roughly similar age living nearby.

TL;DR: Sporting achievement is fleeting and pointless and therefore disproportionately attractive to stupid people.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 18:31, closed)
This board is mainly used by British lower middle class unskilled white-collar workers.
Nobody can pen up a lifetime of belligerence and resentment for the abilities of others like your average British lower middle class unskilled white-collar worker, particularly if they consider the others in question to be beneath them on the social ladder, or those abilities are useful, practical skills like numeracy or even just being able to tell your arse from your elbow.
(, Mon 23 Apr 2012, 22:29, closed)
Fuck yeah
Smack it to the pasty web-fatties
Good on you
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 9:12, closed)
there isn't any rule but people like to generalise.
The time commitment thing has some merit, but I and many people I know can train multiple times a week, maintain a decent standard of our respective sports without it affecting our academic careers, so it's not impossible.

You could argue that professional sports attract those who have no strengths elsewhere, and whole "sporting career is fleeting" thing, but since your average premier league footballer makes more in a week then a professor does in a year, I think that's a bit of a silly argument.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 10:01, closed)
Sporting careers are fleeting
Sure, professional athletes can have careers of ten or twenty years, but how many of those are there? The overwhelming majority of those who play sport seriously in childhood have stopped doing so by the time they leave university. Compare, if you like, the number of school, university and adult hockey teams. Probably a 100:10:1 drop out rate, or thereabouts.
(, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 16:19, closed)
Well, I know it's not everyone's experience.
But I don't recall any other lesson when the teacher used a corner flag to whip people who disn't keep up.
I don't recall any other teachers making people hold weights at arms length because they forgot something, then slapping them when they let their arms down.
I don't recall any other lessons but PE when it was acceptable to force boys to run into each other at speed.

It may not be the case for every school, and it's likely stopped by now, but there are plenty of things that PE teachers have done to kids which verge on ritual abuse so I think people have every right to blame the neandertaal cunts.

Oh, for what it's worth, I was always good enough at sport to avoid most abuse and what I did get din't bother me. I was even moderately good at athletics but it bored the shit out of me and I made that clear to the teachers so I was left alone but never picked for teams. I was also, at that time, in the top 5 in my year at every subject.
(, Tue 24 Apr 2012, 18:39, closed)
You are Hermione Granger
aicmfp
(, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 12:43, closed)
Who's that?
Is it a Rizzle Kick?
(, Wed 25 Apr 2012, 14:40, closed)

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