Sweet mother of God.
::NOTE:: My apologies in advance for length, but then again, my parents were really weird...

My mother was a dental hygienist for 18 years before going back to school to get her teaching degree (IDK why either). She's a teacher now, but some dental hygienist-type bullcrap stayed with her when I was young [in her defense, none of us kids--there were 3 of us--ever got a cavity, but still and all...]:

* only sugar-free candy (tastes like ~naughty~ and has sorbitol and/or xylitol in it, which is the same stuff that they put in Ex-Lax--so if you've got a sweet tooth, you'll wind up doubled up in pain on the toilet all night ~naughty~ing your guts out)
* take a travel toothbrush and toothpaste to school with you (I was the only kid EVER to have to get up from the lunch table and say, "Sorry, guys; be right back--gotta go brush my teeth!")
* floss twice a day (this was pretty strictly enforced, too)

As a "special treat", we got to pick out our own toothpaste! Woo!
However, it had to be mint toothpaste. Why not the cool, fun, awesome kiddie bubblegum-flavored ones that all my friends used, you ask?
My mother replied: "It's like brushing your teeth with Froot Loops, and your father and I [it was always "your father and I" when it was a serious issue, such as toothpaste] won't have that garbage in this house."

Also, my parents are excessively prudish when it comes to privileges and entertainment. A sampling of "The Best Of Mom & Dad LOLerskates & Co.'s Rules" follows:
* no caffeinated anything ("you'll twitch like a weirdo, and it'll probably mess with your fertility")
*absolutely no alcohol, ever (when I brought up the fact that Jesus Himself made water into WINE, my parents replied, "Well, it was DIFFERENT back then"); I don't drink anyways, so whatever
* no watching of certain programs
- Are You Afraid of the Dark? ("Satanic, obviously, and it'll give you nightmares for weeks")
- anything on MTV or VH1
- certain things on the Discovery or History Channels about Jesus ("probably biblically inaccurate; they'll just fill you with New-Age, Wiccan 'filth' and 'lies'"--yeah, mom and dad; they probably will... again, whatever)
- anything having to do with witchcraft/sorcery/magic, sex, obscene language/profanity, etc. (you can't even BEGIN to imagine how many shows, movies, etc. THIS ruled out)
* hella-strict curfews
- during the schoolyear, curfew was 10:00 p.m. Sunday thru Thursday and Saturday nights ("can't have you staying out late on Saturday night, 'cause there's CHURCH on Sunday morning, and you can bet your bottom dollar you and your brother and sister'll be there at 10:30 a.m. on the dot, young lady")
- during the schoolyear, curfew was 10:30 p.m. on Friday nights (the 'rents always sighed and said, "I guess you can stay out 'til 10:30... it is the weekend, after all...")
- during the summer, curfew was 11:00 p.m. Sunday thru Friday nights
- during the summer, curfew was 10:00 p.m. on Saturday nights (church again)
* no cursing, ever (they consistently broke, and still break, this rule at home)
* no calling boys (..."unless you want them to think you're some little harlot" said my mother; my father would nod assent)
* no "promiscuous activity" or drugs (I didn't anyways, but they way they went about saying it made "the act" sound so naughty and that nobody ever did it or talked about it)
* no going off to the mall on your own, ever ("some perverted old man is just waiting to get his hands on you--he'll 'take advantage' of you; that's for sure")

I'll spare you the rest (and, to be honest, there are too many to remember).
You can imagine how cool Mom & Dad LOLerskates seemed to all my friends.

I love them both dearly. I just wished that the rules hadn't been so strict... I probably missed a lot of good shows.
(Mademoiselle Dustman picked a bouquet of oopsie daisies for you on, Fri 9 Mar 2007, 0:37, Reply)