Age 17
Taking shrooms with a couple of mates.

Then going back to one of their parents' for Sunday lunch.
(><(((">, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 8:06, Reply)

Sherbert
A friend and I used to messily snort sherbert in front of passing cars rather like how 11 year olds imagine cocaine fiends would behave.
(Rich Chestmat, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 7:35, Reply)

Oh here we go...
Being right in the middle of afore mentioned classy teenage-hood, i have a few.. I should also mention that the rest of my family is highly Destiny Church styles religious..

Age 13: No shoes for a month. My feet hurt like fuck afterwards...

Age 14: Discovered the joys of alcohol and boys. Sculled a litre of Smirnoff for a dare and blacked out. To this day I don't really know what I was trying to prove..
Told my parents that I was giving up Christianity in favour of the Nympho's church. (went down like a thai hooker). Snuck into r18 movies because i was 'so mature'.

Age 15: After copious amounts of alcohol and few mystery pills, decided that the obvious thing to do would be to streak past the parent's church (yes this was on a sunday morning...classy).
Brought a male friend home and told my parents that he was a gay christian..
Collected about 8 male friends in my room, shut the door and made lots of sex noises, thumping squealing, then came out with messy hair and told my parents and their vicar that we'd had an orgy.

Age 16: Settled into the usual teenage routine of drinking and burning :)
Threatened my boyfriend's little brother with a flamethrower. Left a nice big burn mark on boyfriend's ceiling. Oops...

And I still consider myself normal, yes
EDIT: *pop*
(Holy Gabrielle is Holy, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 6:04, Reply)

Football trip to Venice
When I was 17 our football team went to Venice – by coach! It took 18 hours and on the way back we were doing stupid teenage things to pass the time. One guy was telling the story of how he saw someone stick a condom up their nose and pull it out of their mouth. Being the boastful twat I was at that age I loudly declared that I can do that.

The only girl on the coach (the managers daughter) produces a condom from her handbag and says ‘go on then’. Bollocks. Everyone’s gathering around and there’s no way I can get out of it. Obviously I’d never done it before and I wasn’t even sure how to do it but I couldn’t admit that now and was faced with the onerous task of performing this stunt.

I took it out of its wrapper, unraveled it and proceeded to snort it up my nose. The pain was excruciating and soon the taste of spermicide kicked in started making me gag. My eyes were streaming as I put my fingers into my mouth and tried to grab the little bit of latex that was now dangling in the back of my throat. I managed to snag it whilst my gag reflex was going into overdrive.

I flossed my nasal cavity a couple of times before whipping the condom back through my nose. I was in a lot of discomfort – too much to enjoy the rapturous applause I was receiving from my team mates. The worst thing though was the constant nasal leakage that I experienced all the way from the Swiss Alps back to London. I can’t explain why but my nose was leaking like a blind lesbian in a fish shop the entire way home. I didn’t have any tissues so had to make do with the curtain on the back window.

By the time we got back to London the curtain was as stiff as a board and you could have broken it over your knee.
(Creamy Discharge Freeze Motherstickers, this is a fuck up, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 5:30, Reply)

well
I grew my hair out 2 feet
and I'm 18, does that count?
( Arsonade is saving up for a new box of hummus, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 4:41, Reply)

Being sick at will
I have the most very useful ability of being sick at will as long as I've eaten or drank something in the last few hours.

One day, no doubt when our football had been stolen this came up into conversation and I of course obliged in regards to their disbelieving voices!
Most schools had Pokemon, Yo-yos or some other shallow trend, we had copy-cat teenagers being sick. Everywhere.
I've never seen teenage girls so disgusted, I mean, these guys really went to town. For weeks after you could still see dark patches in the playgrounds.

Even now, I'm remembered from school for reasons like that. *sigh*
( TN, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 4:35, Reply)

When i was young and reckless (3 or 4 of years ago?)
we found a dead bird in the playground.

So naturally i chose the option to try and gross out some of the younger students in the only way i knew how...

Putting the dead bird on a sandwich and stamping on it...the proceeding to have a rather impressive game of footy with it around the playground with a few other students.

Not really shocking but it was fun at the time.
(Snailfighter Mk VIII MASTER of the bits underneath the ledges on fences, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 3:25, Reply)

Bad Vibrations
I decided it would be a great idea to try acid for the first time during a double Maths lesson back when I was about 15. Suffice to say I was vastly unprepared for its effects and soon found myself stumbling out of the classroom and toward the toilets, where I spent half an hour trying to make it to the cubicle whilst trying not to fall into the huge void that had opened up at either side of me.
Unsurprisingly, the rest of the day played out like some depraved version of CITV's 'Knightmare'. Plus my mates, in their infinite wisdom, tried their best to 'help' me by taking me to one of their houses at lunch time and giving me a load of vodka. Nice.
Somewhat amazingly this entire event was never discovered by either my teachers nor my parents. The only thing I can't figure out these days is why the fuck I didn't just go home. Ah well, good times.
(thejuicydangler, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 3:22, Reply)

not me but someone i was at school with
this guy called tony was, with his mates, using plastic hollow pens to fire/blow paper pellets at people. He got bored of this and decided instead to 'saw' his rubber using his ruler, then used the hollow pen tube to snort the...not so much powder more tiny bits of rubber... up his nose.
i don't remember if there were any after effects but it was fucking nasty
(Just Harry What should I put here?, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 1:56, Reply)

I once did a poo

(__, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 1:40, Reply)

Goths.
Ben was a goth. He was a hardcore goth at that. Six foot tall, mixed-race dark skin clashing with his dyed black hair and single, white contact lens and tall boots. He didn't look like a stupid teenager with acne and some spiky jewellery at all, he actually looked exactly like Satan incarnate, and when I was young and impressionable, this made him fucking cool. We were never best friends, but we did hang around in the same crowd.

One time, however, he pulled a pair of hairdresser's scissors out of his pocket, then proceeded to make cuts on his chest, when the usual goth crowd was drinking in our park spot in Camden. This was after prolonged drinking so he didn't have a great degree of self-control and ended up visibly bleeding and scarred. A man passed by and asked if he was alright, if he'd like an ambulance, at which Ben began to hurt himself more vigorously and shout "SATAN, FUCKING SATAN, FUCKING SATAN" at the poor chap. I swear I'm not making it up.

Another time, which I have heard about but never witnessed, concerns Ben's desire for a glass eye. He really did covet this person he knew with a glass eye, so he sought with his usual determination to get one for himself. He achieved this by putting first a bottle of vodka in his stomach and then a bottle of toilet-cleaner bleach in his eye. He passed out, woke up in terrific pain in hospital, blind in one eye, and later says his only regret was that he couldn't get a real glass eye out of the ordeal.

Besides Ben, we used to run with another girl who drank bleach (rather than pouring it in her eye like you're obviously supposed to) in a suicide attempt, resulting in her womb being removed - fucking risky form of contraception if you ask me, and Mushroom Joe, who cut elaborate satanic symbols into his wrists while hallucinating with the aid of magic mushrooms.

A fight was once started by someone we didn't know calling a girl we knew "a marilyn manson lookalike" because her boyfriend took exception to the fact that Marilyn Manson is a man (so, obviously, to look like him is to look manly - he's not David fucking Hasselhoff, you know). This was a proper gang fight, as well - the opposing, punk-fashioned gang bought bicycle chains and bits of metal. It also wasn't the first - we had had a run-in with a Somalian gang that involved one of the goths showing a white-pride tattoo or something, in which ten of our number were visibly injured, including the boy with the tattoo, who was stabbed near-fatally.

One time, this guy we know who's name I've forgotten had slept with another chap's girlfriend. The boyfriend in this story was a proper hard-nut who'd been in and out of anger management, the poor goth. He's a fairly nice guy, to be fair, but when he found out about this, we were all on our way to a house party at one of our friends, and both her boyfriend and her side-dish were on the train. Before we got on the train, Boyfriend beat Side up. When we got off the train, Boyfriend beat Side up. We got a little way up the road when Boyfriend beat Side up again, were at the house party when Boyfriend beat Side up a fourth time, and upon leaving the house, Boyfriend beat Side up a fifth time. Five. Seperate. Times.

We also continually tolerated, for some reason, the presence of a skinhead paedophile called Timmy who used to dress entirely in leather, carry a whip, mix and buy drinks for the younger girls, and had a restraining order against a thirteen-year-old goth girl, the youngest girl that would hang around with us.

Finally, there was one story concerning us goths which had a happy ending. A girl I didn't really know was talking about jumping into Camden Lock, in her heavy boots she probably would have drowned, when my friend came up to her and said "Oh man, stop that! What's the matter?". She replied: "Fuck off! I've lost my fucking baby, and it's all his fault!" and she started crying incoherently. He said, without missing a beat "Cheer up! You can always have another one!" to our general laughter and, I suppose, shock.

Everything in this post is true, by the way. Apologies for length.
( Reid got it going on like Donkey Kong, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 1:31, Reply)

I didn't wait till I hit teens to rebel
I just ran away aged three.

M. McCann
(Pavlov'sDog is all out of pavlova, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 1:31, Reply)

A right good kicking
Our form room door at comprihensive school was constantly locked. Standing in the corridor was never fun due to knobheads constantly pushing people about etc so I was anxious to get into the room and sit down, far away from the idiots in the corridor. I started kicking out at the door, not very hard, but enough to feel as though I was making some sort of protest.

Unfortunately the door and frame were quite old and before long the thing came clean off its hinges.

I blamed it on depression and frustration with the hope of a sympathy vote getting me off the hook for the worst of it. It worked. I wasn't charged for the door, expelled or even put in detention.

What I did have though, was several months of anger management classes.

The whole class would look at me like I was a mentalist when a pupil would walk in and ask me to report to the anger management therapist (whose nickname when he was previously a teacher was Mad Dog - go figure).

It was okay though. I got to get out of Welsh for several weeks and didn't have to talk about anything "until I was ready", meaning I could just read and have a skive.
( shovelboy This is bad - Two minutes to Belgium, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 0:51, Reply)

shitloads of stuff!
mostly when highly stoned.
i sewed the sleeves of my dad's coat closed to piss him off, i put mustard in my sister's dandruff shampoo, i pierced my ear 7 times(piece of ice and a pin, easy!) because i was bored, got caught shoplifting(earrings), got a couple of tattoos, dated a married man 24 years older than me, drank in the worst pubs in town and got a job as a stripper.

ah, good times...
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 0:50, Reply)

Like most other people
I drank cider in a park and sulked a lot.
(ladyintheradiator, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 0:43, Reply)

Where to start?
My first point doesn't qualify strictly speaking...I was sent home from school for the first time ever for swearing and shouting the F word at a teacher. When I was in year 2.

The second point doesn't quite make the cut either...I first got drunk when I was 9 years old. Uncle and Auntie's Anniversary and lots of booze going about...why not? I haven't stopped since and I'm 19 now...bad stuff.

As for the teenage years, activities have ranged from the standard (taking cocaine, climbing statues, playing chicken on main roads etc.) to the more extreme (drinking so much my dad finds me passed out naked on the bathroom floor at four in the morning, deciding it would be smart and time-saving to roll sideways down next to a main road to my house). I also drew a cock on the school field with bicarbonate of soda.

This paints me in an awful light actually...I'm actually a very normal and sensible young man now.

Ed.X
(HNGTHDJ, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 0:37, Reply)

It seemed like a good idea
it was one of those, "yeah, that'll be great fun" ideas. "Lets go in the Kitchen, pull our pants down in front of the window, pull our ass cheeks wide apart (This ain't going where you think, dirty f*ckers...) and then wait to see who chickens out first.

Twas in the mates house. He suddenly legged it, I turned round to see why, and there's his dad outside the window with a somewhat shocked look on his face.

Did I mention his dad was principal of the school?

That went down well... I don't think he ever understood me...
(beirtipol, Fri 20 Jul 2007, 0:28, Reply)

I snorted Rocket Fuel coffee one
and spent an hour or so telling everyone how buzzed I was. "Oh man, this is such a rush!" etc. Looking back, I wasn't gone at all, I was just revelling in the joys of acceptance for doing a "hardcore thing". All that really happened was my nose oozed brown shit for a day. Christ, that stung.

I once sold a mate a roll-up pretending it was a spliff. Dave, I'm sorry (but you claiming to be all spangly was amusing).

When at college we used to drive past a place called Beaver Lodge on our daily trips to the woods. One day we nicked the sign for it, and it lived in my mates car for the rest of the year. It was funny to a bunch of 18 year old stoned students.

The real fuk-da-man would be this story but I've already had my glory with that...

More to come no doubt, I was well punk, innit.

(ugh)
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 23:55, Reply)

I was born....
....shocked the shit out of my 16 year old mum.

Fnar.
( The Pollitt chooses to listen to Enya on, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 23:45, Reply)

Cleo and the mystical...
"Such as eating stinging nettles. (boiled first)"

So... nettle soup?
(slotbadger, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 23:33, Reply)

Well there was this one time....
I thought I was cool. Me and about 20ish mates went round to another friends house, where we were wrongly advised that her parents would be out all night. anyway, as teenagers do, we wrecked the joint and emptied the drinks cabinet, as you do. I went off to puke somewhere, and when i returned, the frinds mother was in the lounge, (oh shit) giving all of our friends a big lecture about the state of the house and emptiness of the drinks cabinet.

Anyway i was obviously still obliterated, even after vomiting and was being cocky with the mother, (might i add with a load of chunks in my hair from previous telephone conversations down the porcelain phone)and swaying alot etc etc, i'm sure you can picture it, (i can't/don't want to). then, she turned to me and said "my eyes are blue not green". now what the fuck does that mean i thought?? (and still do), but noooooooo, instead of keeping my gob shut, i said to her, i dont give a fuck what colour your eyes are love, i've just been sick...

needless to say, i was banned from that house for the rest of my teenage life.

shame that, they had a great drinks cabinet...

bastards.
( rebeccaslicker, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 23:13, Reply)

OK it wasn't me but it was still funny!!
Way back in the day (1994), me and my mate thought we were brainy and we took our German GCSE exams a year early. On the day of our oral exam, I was supposed to meet said mate, so we would walk in together, revising, talking about boys, milk of magnesia (see earlier post) etc etc. Anyway, fact is she didn't show, so as i was an arse licker i decided to go on so not to be late. Imagine my horror when my mate finally arrived, staggering like a tramp on meths, to find that she had tipped whiskey into a bottle of nail varnish remover that she thought was empty but wasn't and necked it....

Well need i go on??

I sat the exam alone...... and failed. Bitch..
( rebeccaslicker, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 22:48, Reply)

I'm up there with noit
In that my story is also not very exciting. In high school, 1st year, (so year 7), we were given a questionnaire to complete, asking if us children had partaken in any drug taking.... My response was (in writing i am ashamed to say) "I drank a pint of milk of magnesia once - diluted" - yes guys diluted.... How I lived to tell the tale i'll never know...

Innocent minds eh??? they dont last long i tell thee!!!
( rebeccaslicker, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 22:41, Reply)

1980's programming?
I used to do a nice line in BASIC programming for the C64 along the lines of black and red flashing screen with the legend 'bomb alert' in the middle. Alas all I can remember of it now is the first line...

10 poke 809,255

Much geeky kudos if you remeber what that one does.
(bigquack, Thu 19 Jul 2007, 22:32, Reply)