Frozen Food Company
Once I was working during the summer as a Cold Store warehouse person. I was very badly trained and so was my co-worker (we were there replacing one fully experienced warehouseman, that used to run the place by himself), to the point where we were worse than useless. Add to this the fact that our environment was in minus 25 degrees C, and you can imagine imcompetence to an unparalelled degree.

First off we used to squash each other against the wall with forklift trucks loaded with pallets of frozen chips. The only thing stopping us from crushing ourselves to death is that the wheels spun on the slippery floor.
We also used to pour coffee and tea into the salmon, which would then freeze. Imagine a top chef getting one of these.

I would take great pleasure in putting boot prints in the catering size desserts, and repacking them. Whereas my buddy would fill the staff boxes (which should have been a lucky dip of cosmetically spoiled food they could buy for a fiver) with bits of rubbish he found lying around the carpark.

We were so bad at unloading lorries that the drivers would complain about us to the management. It used to take an hour, with us it was more like three, and because we were only allowed in the cold store for an hour at a time, it would totally drive them mad when we went out to 'warm up'. We didn't care, who else were they going to get to do such a shitty job.

I was eventually sacked for being caught kicking bags of peas so hard that they would explode everywhere, and make the nightstaff slip over. My mate, I later learned, was sacked just after me, for seeing how quickly a coffee cup full of his piss would freeze in front of the 'blowers'. For those technically minded amongst you, if I remember correctly, there was a windchill of minus 40, and it froze in one and a half minutes.
(leancranker, Fri 10 Aug 2007, 16:51, Reply)