The hunt is on.....
In my old job, I had access to loads of weird and wonderful chemicals. Any time we had spare, we would use it making stuff.

Now, in the interest of public safety I won't list HOW I made the following products, but I'll list WHAT I made:

A rudimentary nerve gas
A highly unstable bomb
An extremely smelly gas (insert your own joke)
and an extremely effective kettle descaler.

In the process of making these wonderful additions to the progess of humanity, I achieved the following:

a chemical burn to my chin
a chemical burn to top lip
a near successful gassing of myself when a chemical fumed too much
a chemical burn to my tongue
a near successful bout of hyopcalcemia
and a chemical burn to my eyebrow.

Believe it or not, it was all fun and I wouldn't change any of it.

But by far and away, the best story of workplace boredom came from the shopfloor lads. Many moons ago, there was a shopfloor worker who drove a Reliant Robin. One day, he got into an argument with a group of other workers. Nothing bad, just a disagreement of how a job should be done.

Anyway, home time came and this gentleman, went upstairs to the changing room, had a shower, changed and went to the car park to go home. Problem was, his little Reliant Robin wasn't there! He searched the car park, but it was nowhere to be found. Now panicking, he decides to phone the police. Suddenly, a big hand grabbed his mobile phone.

"What the bloody hell are you doing?! My car's been nicked!"

"No it hasn't, mate! You don't need to phone the police, but it's somewhere on the site!"

The hunt began....

Now fuming, the guy, decides to check all the usual places, behind the factory, by the fork lift trucks etc. No luck. Then he checks around the perimeter of the site. No luck, again. By now, an hour has gone and he still can't find his car. He goes into the factory floor:

"OK, lads! You win! I can't find my car! Well-flipping-done! Where is it?!"

All of them are wearing smiles which would put "The Joker" from "Batman" to shame. Without saying a word (and trying to stifle their giggles), they take him to the warehouse.

"I checked here! It's not here!"

One of the lads, pointed his finger upwards, to towards the ceiling.

Whilst the bloke was getting changed, the rest of the blokes, with military precision, performed the following:

They ran down to the car park and told someone else to bring a fork lift truck to the car park with a wooden pallette. When they met up in the car park, they loaded the guy's Reliant Robin onto the wooden pallette and got the fork lift truck to take it to the main factory floor.

When they met up there, they proceeded to shrink wrap the car onto the pallette so it was firmly locked onto the pallette. Now, they took the finished product to the warehouse and loaded it on the highest level of the racking along side the rest of the chemicals and raw materials!

Everyone burst out laughing and the guy permitted himself a wry smile (in a sort of "you-got-me" kind of way).

That was the utlimate "workplace boredom" prank I ever heard.

Length? It took 20 minutes to implement, but they got an hour's worth of fun out of it...
(The Stig, Thu 8 Jan 2009, 16:06, Reply)