Picture the Scene
14 years old, I'm at home watching Newsround and, obviously, get the raging horn. So I get some butter out of the fridge, apply it to my genitals and start thrusting my cock into the TV's aerial socket.

you can tell what happened next... my dog came in and started licking the TV! Problem was there was loads of static and he ended up vomiting - RIGHT INTO MY FUCKING JAP'S EYE!

I've never felt so disgusted - fortunately my mum had walked into the room and gently sucked the dog puke out of my penis.

We've never spoken about it since.
(Confused, would we? doesn't know what time it is at, Tue 19 Jun 2007, 11:55, Reply)