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yeah they are but i think i had the mumps when i was a kid
man that's a shit name for a disease, it sounds like a kid's programme
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 8:41, archived)
It does, rather. Something animated featuring large, blue, fluffy characters.
I managed to avoid getting them as a kid and got them as a twentysomething instead, when they hit you ten times harder.
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 8:42, archived)
haha indeed
i'm just checking with my mum to see if i did have the mumps when i was a kid, if not i reckon you might be right. it looks like i've got the desperate dan chin bit to come if so

edit - the symptoms match up with the nhs website's diagnosis of the mumps, it's either that or bad aids
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 8:47, archived)
You typically get a high fever during seroconversion, if that puts your mind at rest.

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 8:56, archived)

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 8:59, archived)
it does, thanks doc!
now if we can just rule out swamp fever, hammer toe, SARS and ebola i'll be a happy chump
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:03, archived)
I recently spent some time in hospital
Where I was told by some jumped up GCSE failing consultant, that, "someone your age should not be this unwell, we have to consider HIV as a serious possibility"
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:05, archived)
bloody hell, and they say the old fashioned bedside manner is a dying art!

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:07, archived)
Yeah just after they had given me a shot of morphine and about 10 minutes after regaining consciousness
From a seizure. Really odd thing is I never saw that doctor again for the rest of the ten days I spent in there.
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:13, archived)
Probably not a real doctor.
A shirt, a tie, and an ID badge will let you get away with a great deal, in a hospital.
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:16, archived)
This actually did cross my mind. Genuinely and my girlfriend had just left it was about 4am on the day I was admitted. And really wasn't with it at all.

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:18, archived)
They'll rumble 2Can, eventually.

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:30, archived)
He hasn't been around for a while has he?

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:49, archived)
Someone should check his greenhouse cam.

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:53, archived)
There's a black man masturbating in there.

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 10:00, archived)

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 10:02, archived)
There was a trial a few years ago
where one of the witnesses had been tested for HIV about nine months previously and been told he was neg, except the clinic had given him the wrong results. Counsel for the prosecution was cross-examining him and asked something like "And was this at the time you learned you were HIV positive?", and the guy completely freaked out on the witness stand. The judge said "This must never happen again."
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:15, archived)
Fucking hell.

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:18, archived)
holy shit

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:23, archived)
He got called as a witness whilst unaware that he'd had the wrong test result?

(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:50, archived)
So it just goes to show that you learn something every day, even if that something is that you're HIV positive.
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:54, archived)
right well my mum says i've had the mumps so i guess it's just some shitty virus
it's a shame cos i was looking forward to eating some cow pie
(, Thu 20 Apr 2017, 9:10, archived)