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Can someone fill me in on who is banned and why?
Bring back dozer
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:45, archived)
pogrom
two hats for pointing out something obvious
Grrrssy for slut shaming
and everyone racism
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:47, archived)
Are we being oppressed so Rob can monetise B3ta?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:48, archived)
I can't talk about here
there are too many eyes
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:49, archived)
You're thinking of a potato

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:00, archived)
Two Hats is apparently banned,
and Grrry is banned, both because rob threw a hissy fit, but let's not bring back dozer, eh?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:47, archived)
Grrr and Boyce got stepped for a week for posting jokes Rob didn't like
TH got permabanned for pointing out that Rob's joke was offensive to the elderly
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:48, archived)
Perma ban? Lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:50, archived)
Yeah
He sends his love, by the way
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:50, archived)
I miss him
Was Boyce banned for the Juice joke?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:52, archived)
Stepped
and yes
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:53, archived)
How are you anyway?
It's been mega busy here.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:18, archived)
Yeah, I'm alright
same old
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:30, archived)
That's what I said: hissy fit.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:50, archived)
That's odd isn't it because rob has seemed so jolly lately, like a big old jolly uncle

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:55, archived)
Me soon
www.b3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/post2631617
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:50, archived)
that's fine
something with Corbyn might get you stepped
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:51, archived)
He's stepping for breaking rule 1, but not rule 3.
What a big fucking stupid ginger prick.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:06, archived)
How about this then?
www.b3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/post2631618
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:08, archived)
Gone before I saw it

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:15, archived)
Wow, someone's keeping on top of the modding

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:32, archived)
mod this
*points at crotch*
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:36, archived)
*steps penus*

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:42, archived)
why was that deleted?
I was joking about Corbyn.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:33, archived)
I'm still here somehow, more's the pity, probably on the off-chance that one day I can be arsed to do another animation that gets retweeted by some z-lister

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:55, archived)
you're actually posting in a simulation
you were banned five years ago
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:58, archived)
Have I got this right? The person who founded Sickipedia is now instructing people "No isms"

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:40, archived)
Yup.
Couldn't possibly upset whoever it is he's trying to sell advertising space to.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:47, archived)
I suspect that Rob is currently crafting a full and frank apology, as we speak
describing how he regrets his heavy handed, not to mention hypocritical, actions, and will reinstate three of the most popular members of this forum, forthwith
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:50, archived)
Manowiff has been quiet, I wonder if he's had a Skype meeting and been told to toe the line

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:52, archived)
He'll turn up tomorrow morning with short hair, wearing a suit and tie
showing us graphs and shit
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:55, archived)
Oh, he's on /board telling them he likes the woo yay gifs.
I think maybe he's depressed pining for the old days when people briefly gave a shit who he was.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:57, archived)
careful
you'll be next
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:58, archived)
It's alright, me and manowhiff are mates

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:02, archived)
so was Two Hats......





so was Two Hats......................
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:10, archived)
They broke up. It was awful

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:16, archived)
probably got too sexual

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:21, archived)
It'll all come crashing down once someone photoshops his sponsor pissing on him.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:50, archived)
lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:51, archived)
hI gAES
Im still here!
Seems to me that banning the most popular and active posters won;t do this place any favours.

What a fun sponge.

It's a wacky and irreverent comedy website... But stick to the rules, yeah?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:43, archived)
/talk doesn't create content. Board, qftw and even links does to a point.
We're no good to anyone.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:48, archived)
you're good to me

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:50, archived)
DUB

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:27, archived)
/links is just youtube and racism

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:52, archived)
/board is just tired, 10 year old memes and japanese pornography

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:52, archived)
and the less said about QOTW's output, the better

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:53, archived)
Isn't the internet just YouTube, racism and social media.
If he can wrestle back control of /talk as a safe space for the old home sweet home dweebs, he has every aspect of modern internet covered.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:53, archived)
fair point

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 16:53, archived)
Can someone let mcbeef know that I've got him a ticket to see Jeff Dunham at Wembley Arena

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:19, archived)
RIP offtopic

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:32, archived)
Anybody know any good Prince jokes?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 17:37, archived)
So.......

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:33, archived)
+ here it is, Merry Christmas...

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:36, archived)
It's christmas in australia soon
fact
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:36, archived)

fact crikey
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:23, archived)
NTT
hey grrrmachine, since you're definitely lurking. maybe if you call your new sockpuppet account something other than 'grrrmachine_temp', it might stand less chance of getting instabanned before you can even use it, you dickhead
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:53, archived)
^ Tggi.
Go for something totally unrelated, like bald_monkey.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:55, archived)
2H2?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:58, archived)
Sounds like a boys' band.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:20, archived)
I hope this isn't a fat joke

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:21, archived)
You must be mistaking me for the sort of person who finds 'isms' funny.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:23, archived)
in which case
boys' gastric
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:24, archived)
#ismfest

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:25, archived)


(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:28, archived)
don't rise to it, m8

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:32, archived)
like the cakes you eat! lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:33, archived)
I was part of it the whole time

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:33, archived)
et tu, dollé

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:38, archived)
the gang broke KP

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:44, archived)
well, he did know and he didn't

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:46, archived)
i love that bit when dennis starting going nuts as they take the piss out of him for being out of the loop

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:47, archived)
yeah, that whole episode is strong but the last scene is fucking amazing
mac posted on instagram that they were going to be filming something at the football stadium and added a picture or the gang plus extras. dennis wasn't in it :(
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:54, archived)
2 Hats 2 Furious

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:45, archived)
lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:57, archived)
lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:01, archived)
Woah you can probably get banned for starting new threads now

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:37, archived)
for some reason I can't use the drop down menu to change font in Adobe illustrator
it's stopped working, yet if I type the font in 'hey presto!' What a fucking world we are living in.
A googleling the problem yields fuck all
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:38, archived)
I'm sorry to hear that m8

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:40, archived)
it's a pain in the annus

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:45, archived)
Rob banned it

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:42, archived)
And now grrry again ffs

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:44, archived)
jesus

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:45, archived)
we'll all be gone by the end of the week
if not sooner
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:48, archived)
probably for the best
see you guys in the next world
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:48, archived)
I don't see how killing off talk will help him

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:48, archived)
qotw and board may have about a quarter of the posts that we have
but they produce the Content™
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:11, archived)
Just so we're clear on the accepted standard
jelly.b3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/post2631610
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:33, archived)
Christ

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:38, archived)
Fucking hell

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:43, archived)
oh

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:45, archived)
Is that your chatup line?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:40, archived)
more or less

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:41, archived)
less please

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:09, archived)
this might be a bit racist, not sure tho
jelly.b3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/post2631605
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:42, archived)
I can't see it

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:46, archived)
haha
it's been deleted
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:47, archived)
did you write it?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:47, archived)
Nope
gusofnavarone?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:48, archived)
Bit much just after cinco de mayo

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:46, archived)
There's your answer right there.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:47, archived)
Apparently you can set up a chat forum,
with up to 250,000 page views per month, unlimited threads, unlimited active users and built-in anti-spam protection for under $18 a month. Who'd have thought it, eh?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:49, archived)
My sense of humour hasn't moved on since the playground. I still find "you're gay" jokes funny.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:51, archived)
that's an ism
b&
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:11, archived)
not my words
but the words of [redacted] who was thirty at the time
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:12, archived)
pls can you clarify the RULES OF ENGAGEMENT before I post in this thread?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:09, archived)
get butt naked

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:10, archived)
whip it out

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:17, archived)
then bop it
twist it
pull it
bop it
etc
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:20, archived)
oh COME ON

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:22, archived)
sixty-three hundred dollar suit! C'MON!

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:27, archived)
Just don't say anything critical of the sponsors
or anything that the sponsors might interpret as critical of rob's management of the site. That way, you'll be fine.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:27, archived)
Oh fuck I accidentally "liked" this
see you guys later :(
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:40, archived)
take care, kid
see you on the other side
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 14:41, archived)
Replying to see if I've been banned

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:02, archived)
you're safe

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:10, archived)
for now

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 15:10, archived)
Good to see that rob is cracking down and purging the site of undesirables.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:42, archived)
see you later then

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:43, archived)

later then next tuesday
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:53, archived)

undesirables comedy
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:47, archived)
Qotw is no laughing matter.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:53, archived)
Might go travelling
See the world. Maybe pitch a tent on Imgur for a while
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:50, archived)

go travelling
See the world. Maybe pitch a tent on Imgur for a while
do a poo
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:51, archived)
no mentions of bodily fluids pls
this is a family forum
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:52, archived)
go gulp my chyle

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:54, archived)
series 5 arrested development soon

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:55, archived)
YES!
And they've 'remixed' season 4, right? That'll be an interesting watch.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:57, archived)
hated season 4
but ill try and watch this edited version
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:58, archived)
Ah, I liked it
Not as strong as the others, but enjoyable
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:59, archived)
Have you seen 'Transparent'?
If so, what did you think? Full disclosure, I loved it
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:00, archived)
no but i do love jeffrey tambor

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:02, archived)
Well, his alleged sexual harrassment aside
the show is really good.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:06, archived)
i still rewatch the Larry Sanders show just for his bits

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:09, archived)
lol willy and knackers

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:10, archived)
lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:11, archived)
he'

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:51, archived)
these people have been ruining b3ta for too long

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:56, archived)
Bring back Grub Fartgnome.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:58, archived)
At last.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:00, archived)
Has he lost his job?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:02, archived)
deplorables, more like

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:03, archived)
wait who got banned?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:04, archived)
it's more of a pogrom

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:10, archived)
hey, you've just made me realise that now would be the perfect time to ban you, as it would look like you just got caught up in all this qotw stuff
fucking brilliant. say goodbye to 2can everyone! i'll do it at some point this week so you have some time to get your affairs in order
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:12, archived)
he's definitely done some isms and possibly non-jokes too

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:18, archived)
As the forums population is getting older I think we need a doctor on standby here

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:22, archived)
Thanks mongy. Nice to see someone appreciates me

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:24, archived)

looks like we're ok on that front
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:24, archived)
We used to have one, but he was a bit shambolic.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:25, archived)
:(

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:25, archived)
I don't think we can afford to lose more forum members

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:39, archived)
No don't do that
2Can's posts on /talk are the closest we can get to GP consultations around here.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:59, archived)
What's the proper term for discrimination against food poisoning?
Botulism.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:43, archived)
Discrimination against the tenth letter of the alphabet?
Jism.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:58, archived)
Posting these over here is pretty cowardly.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 12:59, archived)
I'm not giving Rob any material for his joke book

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:02, archived)
I'm not giving rob material for his joke book and I don't fancy being stepped.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:11, archived)
I don't like jingos
is that jingoism?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 13:00, archived)
morning

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 7:21, archived)
Gooooood morning 50p HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:08, archived)
I had a great weekend

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:10, archived)
no you didn't you fucking liar

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:21, archived)
I racked up the best part of 300 miles,
Sorted the whole garden out and got leathered. What more do you want.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:58, archived)
the gentle embrace of a twin spirit
and a FAB
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:59, archived)
I had 3 ice lollies

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:36, archived)
yo white boy

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:13, archived)
don't impose your ethnic identity on me

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:21, archived)
Yoo haloooo
I have had a lovely, refreshing shower at work and am now daisy-fresh and rejuvenated.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:34, archived)
didn't know daisies were renowned for their freshness

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:42, archived)
she is

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:04, archived)
He showered in dog piss

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:38, archived)
Said Dove on the bottle
but it did look like bird poo
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:51, archived)
I've been doing that this past week after biking in.
Comfort bonus +250.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:43, archived)
This is one of the reasons I quite like going to the gym
before I start work
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:22, archived)
Hi Grrrmachine
I hope your trip was as pleasant as possible
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:39, archived)
yer, it was alright actually

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:42, archived)
Good
My shed's looking well boss. I've got all the big bits hanging off hooks now. It looks like a shed in a B&Q commercial.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:43, archived)
wait till the spiders move in

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:51, archived)
Man, there were some big fuckers in the old one when I was clearing it out

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:51, archived)
great big wolf spiders?
or the stupid gangly ones that look like daddy long legs?
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:00, archived)
big, thick legged buggers
Also, these ones with big, round abdomens. Either way, ugly as fuck. I don't mind the spindly ones. It'd be like being scared of a piece of string.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:03, archived)
^afraid knot

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:10, archived)
a frayed knot, maybe?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:16, archived)
(^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:28, archived)
morning chap's

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:40, archived)
and chapesses

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:42, archived)
Astra sri 1ltr turbo, y/n ?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:40, archived)
y all the way

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:43, archived)
That's what I thought , I'll book a test drive , don't fancy another Ford

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:44, archived)
y
make the most of it - there won't be any more Vauxhalls coming out in the future.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:17, archived)
Legit?
I am Ms.Ella Golan, I am the Executive Vice President Banking Division with FIRST INTERNATIONAL BANK OF ISRAEL LTD (FIBI). I am getting in touch with you regarding an extremely important and urgent matter. If you would oblige me the opportunity, I shall provide you with details upon your response.

Faithfully,
Ms.Ella Golan
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:44, archived)
Jews don't lie

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:45, archived)
yes
Dear Ms. Ella Golan,

Fuck you and the rest of your Zionist friends.

Yours,
Boris Johnson.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:46, archived)
Join Labour
they'll sort her out good and proper
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:18, archived)
more bank holiday pls

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:58, archived)
We should be allowed a week off to celebrate Harry's wedding
Anyone who disagrees hates Britain
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 8:59, archived)
I can't stand that baked bean headed cunt

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:03, archived)
Actual lol.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:06, archived)
tangled, you mean

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:06, archived)
no

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:25, archived)
how long till the next one?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:00, archived)
28th

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:07, archived)
2 weeks

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:07, archived)
Thursday.

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:08, archived)
the next one won't count properly as I have the whole week off

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:14, archived)
dirty harry/anal sex joke

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:19, archived)
yeah.
Time for a drink.
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 9:27, archived)
beer, cider, wine or spirits?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:20, archived)
Morning
Think I'm going to have to get stuck in to some housework today
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:09, archived)
I've been doing laundry since forever, it seems

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:20, archived)
I've got to do a load of towels
Not to mention sorting out the bomb site that is my kitchen
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:39, archived)
ok, so just when you thought QotW couldn't get any worse

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:13, archived)
what about this
*points at annus*
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:14, archived)
yeah, that's pretty good, I guess

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:17, archived)
my little annus mirabilis

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:18, archived)
^brony

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:20, archived)
the UK sub reddits are the worst thing imaginable
twee, bland, super-fucking-shit-wank
I want to rip my cock off reading them
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:32, archived)
If a baby is lack toast and tall of rent, how it drink tidy milk???

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:33, archived)
that should be on qtfw

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:35, archived)
the correct answer is through a straw

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:37, archived)
correct

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:39, archived)
Casual UK is a cesspit

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:39, archived)
I logged out and looked , now I feel awful

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:51, archived)
Can confirm, Boyce has been stepped for telling a joke that Rob didn't like

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:04, archived)
Was it a joke about a certain cheeky former German chancellor?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:11, archived)
oh, will you look at that
Not long before I'm stepped, I'm sure
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:34, archived)
what constitutes a non joke?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:38, archived)
dunno lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:38, archived)
TH has been banned, lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:39, archived)
good

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:41, archived)
It's what he deserved

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:42, archived)
it will probably be the thing that drives him back to the catholic church

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:43, archived)
lol

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:38, archived)
what was the joke you submitted?

(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:41, archived)
I didn't submit one at all
Just said something that Rob didn't like

i.imgur.com/0Qq5jJK.jpg
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 11:44, archived)
I hope you're all off out having Bank Holiday adventures

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 11:15, archived)
i'm about to get out of bed

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 11:31, archived)
i just did that, it was awful
got washing in off the line and ended up with wet socks. total fucking disaster, wish i hadn't bothered.
(, Mon 7 May 2018, 12:05, archived)
those he-man duvet covers are really comfy, aren't they

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 12:12, archived)
Off to a barbecue at 2

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 12:19, archived)
don't forget to bring a bottle

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 13:16, archived)
I will not be drinking

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 13:42, archived)
bullshit

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 14:36, archived)
I may have had one or two

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 19:31, archived)
No. Fuck you

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 12:41, archived)
this is an appalling attitude

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 13:17, archived)
Nope , sorting out boxes and shit

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 15:21, archived)
i just went to the co-op!

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 15:52, archived)
I fucking love the coop

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 16:04, archived)
full of sunburnt cunts looking for burger baps today

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 16:07, archived)
cor! baps!

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 16:25, archived)
I'll pick up some whoops on my way home

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 16:43, archived)
Mine are planned for tomorrow AND Thursday, trivia fans.

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 18:23, archived)

are craft
(, Tue 8 May 2018, 10:21, archived)
morning

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 7:25, archived)
Huh.
Enjoy your trip to blighty and back?
(, Mon 7 May 2018, 7:36, archived)
SO
MANY
FAT
PEOPLE
(, Mon 7 May 2018, 7:42, archived)
but yer, it was alright. Nice having proper pies and pints again.

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 7:43, archived)
Hence all the fat people.

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 8:15, archived)
Fatest in europe, according to WHO
scontent-frt3-2.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/31955877_1029392257235984_2992471579624996864_o.png?_nc_cat=0&oh=d71cc7a447e5ce9353bd829814ec40b2&oe=5B9CFFE0
(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:12, archived)
alright

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 8:20, archived)
wotcha
that storm last monday was a bit brutal
(, Mon 7 May 2018, 8:33, archived)
Yeah , think some fellas died down ramsgate, gonna be 27 or saink today

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 8:36, archived)
3 washed off margate pier too, dunno if they were rescued

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 8:59, archived)
I'm sure a few idiots will drown today, probably at camber

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:01, archived)
if only they'd stuck to the little railway

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:09, archived)
Didn't get to witness your mate's handiwork, yesterday - didn't fancy sitting on the train in blistering heat, so have postponed our trip.

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 8:38, archived)
I wouldn't wait too long it'll probably fall apart

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:00, archived)
Urgh.

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:19, archived)
overdone it a little?

(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:25, archived)
More than a little
Mystery bruises everywhere
(, Mon 7 May 2018, 9:31, archived)
fuckinell its a new thread
at this time
on a sunday
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 22:13, archived)
remember to put your bins out, by the way

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 22:14, archived)
Strikey g soft cell

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 23:02, archived)
take my bins and sacks for landfill OH

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 23:06, archived)
^tainted love

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 23:10, archived)
Edgy as fuck

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 23:08, archived)
Pushschen zat helm-wrestler downunt ze board
Haha, I'm German! Not really, but I am a far-right sympathiser. Got to know some of our neighbours in 'the squayah' today. Lots of goss, most of it salacious.
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 19:29, archived)
My kid's new mate's cousin got nonced up and the bloke got three years
but the Scotch family who've been here 38 years reckon it ent true, the faam'ly are wrong'uns and so on. It's all frightfully colourful.
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 19:33, archived)
Fuck off you eastenders wannabe

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 20:27, archived)
Rack off mite

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 21:50, archived)
that's so daggy

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 21:56, archived)
Windy fuck'n bogan mite

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 22:41, archived)
^ pushes the needle on the scales to the far-right.

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 19:33, archived)
I went to an airfield.
Then i got a wet boot.
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 20:33, archived)

GS
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 22:43, archived)
Just got home after last night's party
Rough as fuck.
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 21:06, archived)
Sounds bent

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 21:17, archived)
What, your voice?

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 22:42, archived)
shit on a goose

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 21:22, archived)
this is a test message
as we were offline for a bit - exciting times huh?

GOOD MORNING!
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 11:53, archived)
phew

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 12:09, archived)
Yeah, I was beside myself

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 14:58, archived)
welcome back, rob

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 12:15, archived)
two people died

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 12:47, archived)
but three people were born

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 12:53, archived)
+ to bring us this information

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 12:54, archived)
RIP Rik Waller

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 13:31, archived)
Ladies, contain your oegamiams
i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2013/03/27/article-2299861-18F36EB8000005DC-142_634x786.jpg
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 13:41, archived)
alright "riverghost"

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 15:08, archived)
Clicking everything here fyi

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 19:23, archived)
i hope nothing important has changed

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 15:16, archived)
something something
changes to spin up site in docker something something
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 15:58, archived)
I didn't vote for this

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 16:33, archived)
None of us did , typical fucking mods

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 18:26, archived)
I'm afraid I have, into my dope new fucken shirt

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 19:24, archived)
Does it have "I like the Pope: the Pope smokes dope" on it?

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 19:25, archived)
Adihash
GIVES YOU SPEED!!
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 22:44, archived)
morning

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 16:10, archived)
Morning

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 8:33, archived)
good morning

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 8:44, archived)
Sunday again!

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 8:57, archived)
sunday bloody sunday!

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 9:02, archived)
Got a couple of pretty big mosquito bites this morning
I caught it in the act yesterday. Little bugger wouldn't let go
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 9:34, archived)
Get some deet on

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 9:38, archived)
alright missy elliot

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 12:09, archived)
Great for melting plastics as I found out with leaky bottle and mobile. fun times.

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 14:22, archived)
Yo

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 9:04, archived)
Word

(, Sun 6 May 2018, 9:27, archived)
Hullo
Al fresco brekkie, awesome
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 10:26, archived)

#infest
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 10:26, archived)
Too much of a good thing, today.
Yesterday was lovely but they're anouncing 30°C for this afternoon. It's madness, I tell you.
(, Sun 6 May 2018, 10:30, archived)
please could everyone down from london kindly fuck off back there now, cheers.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 18:16, archived)
I'm off for a long ride on the bike tomorrow, going to head inland as I imagine every cunt and their cunt kids are at the beach

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 18:23, archived)
Watch out for inanimate fucking objects.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 19:15, archived)
what like fleshlights and dildoes?

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 19:32, archived)
*oegamiams*
Morning evleebodee!

Looks like a fackin' rippah out there. I'm going to be that arsehole who mows their lawn at 10am
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 9:36, archived)
Happy Birthday, Richard E. Grant.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 10:19, archived)
Thanks!

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 10:31, archived)
mo lawn
mo mowlam
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 10:37, archived)
Fuck that, I had the grass done before 9, this morning.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 10:57, archived)
Morning!
I'm off to see the sights of Wisbech! Like the church.... and Jessops, Wetherspoons.

Excellent curry last night though. Played it safe and had a madras so I actually got to taste it properly.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 11:13, archived)
urgh.
My head hurts.

Work had a leaving do for some bigwig and a guy we work with so we crashed that. Bigwig was having a do at his gaff but it would've been weird to go to that, so I got a carry-out just before 10 and went the pub for 'a couple' but a couple of phd students accosted me and insisted I chat to them and I ended up at theirs and ended up drinking their and my wine.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 13:03, archived)
Morning Beef.
I have a proper hangover. Last night was spent watching Tragedy.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 13:09, archived)
Wanking over Watkins

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 13:14, archived)
Giddy over Gadd

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 13:16, archived)
As much as one would want to write off everything Gadd did, Rock and Roll part II isn't a bad track.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 14:00, archived)
He made some fantastic records
The drums are great
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 15:55, archived)
Some of my favourite drums are by Shellac but they're definitely not one of my favourite bands.
Better bands should copy their drum capture I reckon.

Finally got round to buying a copy of Psychocandy this week. Still waiting for it to arrive, but am listening to Barbed Wire Kisses in its place.

In other record news, I bought this on the 'Awesome Tapes From Africa' range, it's basically excellent Piano House.

professorrhythm.bandcamp.com/album/bafana-bafana

Not sure if you'd like it but I really do.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 15:59, archived)
so did Hitler

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 16:10, archived)
Hitler couldn't lay down a decent bass hook, that should be obvious even to you.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 16:14, archived)
the shit he could do with a hi-hat could blow your dick inside out

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 16:32, archived)
your nan blew my, etc

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 16:44, archived)
Hi-Hatler, etc.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 17:24, archived)
Fuckwits m8, I'm surrounded by Fuckwits.
Need to get out of here and enjoy an epic drunkening
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 13:34, archived)
hallo

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 16:53, archived)
Yo

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 17:04, archived)
alright mgt.
work's sending me to london to talk summit about aws.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 17:15, archived)
what's an aws?

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 18:25, archived)
Looks like I've sold up , job lot all gone if I take the price , I think I should time...lol to move on

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 16:54, archived)
Wow you sure?

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 17:04, archived)
I think so yeah

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 17:29, archived)
I'll give you a tenner a piece for them

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 17:53, archived)
Sounds fair

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 18:17, archived)
You used to like your hi-fi didn't you?
i.imgur.com/clXHEaf_d.jpg?maxwidth=640&shape=thumb&fidelity=medium
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 18:42, archived)
Nice , nad were always a good make for cd players and amps , I've got some arcam stuff in the loft I'd give away

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 19:00, archived)
The quad amp is into some linn kans, clear as fuck but not as much bass as I'd like.
That Nad CD player has been good to me.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 19:05, archived)
That's the thing with speakers, running them in always made me laugh, yeah you get a month return but they take ages to settle and then they're just not what you wanted

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 19:09, archived)
I've got a sub kicking around, or I could just wire the low-end to my kefs that are bi-wireable.
These are the first set that I can hear the original recordings lose top on rather than the speakers. Sounds like there's a band-pass on some of them with the odd snare poking through. Mental to think they're ~50 years old and reproducing frequencies they were incapable of capturing in the '60s.
(, Sat 5 May 2018, 19:20, archived)
OK CHAPS, ONE LAST PUSH, WE CAN DO IT
It's only the fackin' weekend innit? And a bank holiday, to boot!

So come on boarders apart from monster munch, what have you got up your long weekend sleeves?
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:36, archived)
I'm trying out bbqing a half fillet of salmon later
Another bbq 2moz early eve with the nipper, out for brunch Sunday then cinema (some new Jap cartoon thing, Ghibli style), then get pissed, out for luncheon in the West End Monday.

There.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:38, archived)
I hope your fish is undercooked and you get salmonella poisoning.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:40, archived)
thanks m8!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:46, archived)
What's the new cartoon?
Me and the girl watched The Red Turtle on my last sick day, which was a bit odd.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:53, archived)

www.rottentomatoes.com/m/mary_and_the_witchs_flower/
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:17, archived)
Looks like a sound choice.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:31, archived)
Yeah, I'll be more than happy to watch that
They showed Howl's Moving Castle a few months back, nice to see on the big screen.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:39, archived)
I love that film.
Mistakenly recorded the subtitled version off Film4, when the kids were small, so got to provide my own voiceover, which was hugely enjoyable.
Porco Rosso is probably my favourite Ghibli film.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:53, archived)
howl's moving castle is my favourite
followed by spirited away. might watch them tonight
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:54, archived)
Their version of the borrowers is great too

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 17:18, archived)
honey rum and a film tonight
mate's birthday party tomorrow, which should last till about 5pm sunday, then hunker down for the inevitable hangover/comedown
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:43, archived)
sounds alright to me

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:45, archived)
it's usually a belter

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:49, archived)
Assuming my daughter stops being ill, we might pay a visit to Parliament Square on Sunday.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:46, archived)
what's the occasion?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:46, archived)
the internet suggests an anti abortion rally
sounds like a right laugh
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:48, archived)
Ooh, I loves me an abortin'!
Nah, there's a new statue, and it's who my girl was named for, so a photo seems obligatory.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:51, archived)
My mate stevie forde built the plinth for that

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:55, archived)
Thanks, mongy's mate stevie!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 18:44, archived)
Let me know what you think, he'd appreciate the feed back on his plinth, he text me when it was unveiled

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 19:08, archived)
I'll try to tear my eyes away from the majesty of Ms. Fawcett.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 20:06, archived)
He did the diving boards at the olympic park too, he's good with concrete

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 20:14, archived)
Too late surely?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 17:41, archived)
celebrating Delia Derbyshire's birthday tomorrow
going to see garidead's mate David Vorhaus and the one out of savages who isn't manolith's mate play at St John the baptist Church
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:52, archived)
sounds bent

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:19, archived)
Best of all the alcoholic lady composers.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 19:39, archived)
bbq and gardening, and organising the new shed #RockNFuckenRoll
Also, mother got out of hospital a couple of days ago, so I should go visit her really
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:56, archived)
Sorry for your loss

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:57, archived)
no, she survived

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:00, archived)
Oh, congrats on your save

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:38, archived)
also, jonesing for a blumpken
might try and fit that in
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:58, archived)
oh for sure

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:41, archived)
Watching an Italian language film tonight
then who knows
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:07, archived)
subtitles, thankfully

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:08, archived)
?
www.imdb.com/title/tt0108255/?ref_=nv_sr_1
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:11, archived)
lol

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:12, archived)
bobo hoskins greatest film

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:14, archived)
good old bobo

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:22, archived)
RIP Bobo

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:27, archived)

www.imdb.com/title/tt0929425/?ref_=nv_sr_2
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:50, archived)
Oh, that looks cool

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 17:11, archived)
It's very good, actually.
Saw it in the cinema a few years back.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 20:06, archived)
Going to whoop-di-poop myself in to a fever

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:11, archived)

wh l
poop love
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:17, archived)
Do you have a Spotify or other similar music streaming platform?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:28, archived)
+or are you just pleased to see me?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 16:38, archived)
I have a spotify on my mobile telephone

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 17:10, archived)
Look up Kanye Wests new song Lift Yourself.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 18:03, archived)
poop poop!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 18:42, archived)

elf hirt
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 20:08, archived)
you actual fucking idiot

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 21:59, archived)

🤷‍♂️
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 22:04, archived)
Hustling

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 17:06, archived)
Confusion
I got asked for ID when buying fags this morning. I thought the cashier was taking the piss. I have a huge beard and was born when Pluto was a planet and there were twice as many Germanys.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 19:34, archived)

and was born when Pluto was a planet and there were twice as many Germanys I like huge beards. One time they grew them in guantanamo bay. I went to guantanamo bay, but some dude wet my face. I didn't like it.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 19:59, archived)
80s and New Wave bash tomorrow.
That's it so far.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 19:48, archived)
Turns out I'm playing poker, tonight.
I honestly can't remember how.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 20:05, archived)
I expect someone asked you and you agreed.

(, Sat 5 May 2018, 6:36, archived)
I'm in fucking
Wisbech of all places. I've been in 3 pubs so far, all of which have been throwbacks to the early 80s. Haven't yet been herded into a giant wicker man, it's on the cards though.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 21:11, archived)
"I bet he drinks Carling Black Label"

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 22:04, archived)
Bonjour wanquers
Je suis une bellend. Et vous?
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:27, archived)
Stupid French gay prick

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:35, archived)
non, mon amis

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:37, archived)
trois sur quatre, de toute façon

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:47, archived)
THANK YOU
As if I'm French
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:49, archived)
Also, I don't think wanquers is a real French word

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:36, archived)
I don't think YOU'RE a real French word

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:37, archived)
French letter, perhaps

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:37, archived)
You're a shit

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:38, archived)
Oui

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:42, archived)
let's go over to his house and beat him up in his new shed

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:42, archived)
Might shit in the shed

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:43, archived)
might wee and poo

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:50, archived)
Is it possible to poo without weeing?
Not sure
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:51, archived)
The only time I've managed it has been when I've still been wearing clothes.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:54, archived)
Ich bein ein beanburger

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:38, archived)
delicious

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:42, archived)
montrez-moi votre glockenspiel s'il vous plaît

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:38, archived)
marimba d'abord, je ne suis pas un laitier

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:43, archived)
le ol

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:44, archived)
à votre santé

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:40, archived)
cincin

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:41, archived)
ou est la bibliotheque?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:43, archived)
who needs to find a library when they're on holiday?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:45, archived)
fuckin' nerds, that's who

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:47, archived)
oh yeah, forgot

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:50, archived)
la bibliothèque est dans son cul

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:50, archived)
christ, imagine the late fees

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:51, archived)
nique ta mère

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:54, archived)
oh viens maintenant, vraiment

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:57, archived)
je ne suis même pas désolé

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:59, archived)
just booked my ticket for the SOLO movie
may 23rd be with me ...

"une bellend"? quite sure bellends are all males but who knows nowadays.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:00, archived)
you've clearly never met my ex

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:08, archived)
I hope I won't

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:10, archived)
FAO Rob
A bit of news about former b3tans. Maybe this could be a section in the revived newsletter?

www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2018/may/04/jonathan-king-denies-sexual-abuse-of-12-teenagers
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:05, archived)
haha
Didn't ol' JK record an album of songs about how these kids were all begging for it?
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:10, archived)
No, really?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:12, archived)
I know he wrote a musical about it.
Here it is.
www.vilepervert.com/
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:18, archived)
Ok, not sure I should click on that

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:21, archived)
NEIN

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:07, archived)
^britischer pig-dog

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:09, archived)
What about us non-francophones?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:28, archived)
Is that pronounced "frank-ophony" like epiphany?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:33, archived)
:)

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:34, archived)
I thought that when I typed it, but kindly left it for someone else to pick up.
Generous to a fault, me.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:41, archived)
omelette du fromage

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 15:44, archived)
cheers

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:53, archived)
Cheers

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:01, archived)
hey brb have a word will you?
They didn't turn up on Tuesday for the bins and before they showed up a day late, foxes had made a right mess and the street looked awful.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:05, archived)
ok give me the number for your council and your street name and i'll see what i can do

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:08, archived)
my bin collection is going to get very confusing from june
we have a small red box and a small blue box for paper and plastic / metal / glass respectively, we also have a black wheely bin for landfill and a brown one for garden waste. the blue and red boxes are collected weekly and the black / brown wheely bin collected fortnightly but staggered. from june the black bin will be one every three weeks, the blue and red boxes will have no use and a new black bin with a blue lid will be collected fornightly for all recycling. the garden waste collection won't happen unless we pay an additional £14 a year and presumably we'll get another wheely bin for that.

cos i'm super smart i can probably figure it out but imagine old people trying to decipher that puzzle

/broken britain
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:18, archived)
this post just gave me cancer

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:20, archived)
sleep well sweet angle etc

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:22, archived)
i don't read posts if they're more than about 10-12 words
sometimes even that's a stretch
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:31, archived)
you didn't miss anything of value

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:32, archived)
i have a sister in wales
and her recycling is taken once per week, while rubbish for landfil//incineration is collected fortnightly. i applaud her council's decision.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:27, archived)
that's our current setup

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:28, archived)
i like this

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:29, archived)
christ I just clicked on /links
they're upset about gyms now
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:07, archived)
Jesus, they really are the worst people

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:09, archived)
Christ almighty.
They're awful people.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:10, archived)
I just wrote a song about Mr Penis' wife

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:03, archived)
there are a few smug spastics across that board

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:11, archived)
I have a quiet afternoon, I might argue with them a bit.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:14, archived)
I can't handle Prufrock
when he and benito go at it it's like being an unwanted child caught between two hateful parents having an argument.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:05, archived)
what on earth did you do that for

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:14, archived)
I was hoping to pick up girls

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:18, archived)
cba to join in
but i've never been to a gym, i was overweight once and sorted it out by eating less. exercise is free, gyms promote unhealthy ideas, but fucked if i give three shits about it any more.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:14, archived)
I went to a gym, once, didn't enjoy it in the slightest.
I don't approve of jogging, either, but each to their own.

Y'know, I enjoy an online argument as much as the next man, but /links seems too earnest for my tastes.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:18, archived)
I think you meant to post that here:
b3ta.com/links/write.php?parent=1486368
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:19, archived)
cheers

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:23, archived)
I only go to the gym if there's a pool
I love swimming
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:11, archived)
where ELSE are we supposed to battle pokemon?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:16, archived)
Join me at the comic shop on Saturday?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:19, archived)

media.giphy.com/media/l2JdZq86HdJr3FEBy/giphy.gif
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:20, archived)
yeah DUUUUH!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:27, archived)
i can't see it, i must have the person / people on ignore but i'm sure it's a thrill ride

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:26, archived)
Cheers

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:35, archived)
might shit in a sporran

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:43, archived)
Sgian-dubh?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:03, archived)
disgusting

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:08, archived)
I disapprove of any acvitity that takes place
In Scotland.

Except whiskey. That may continue.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:18, archived)
I've never been
the highlands appeal to me
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:19, archived)
I went to Glasgow once
they're either nice, or stabby, and go from one state to the other without warning or transition.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 14:21, archived)
5/7
www.bbc.co.uk/news/stories-43990370
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:57, archived)
rude

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:05, archived)
*flicks "V" signs"

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:08, archived)
-8

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:10, archived)
same

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:22, archived)
ugh

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:20, archived)
you should leave it a while between sessions

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:23, archived)
How long, 90 minutes or so?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:24, archived)
yeah
the juices build up again
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:29, archived)
Hjälp!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:22, archived)
simon cowell used to smoke 80 a day
that's hero level smoking
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:31, archived)
80 what?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:32, archived)
herring

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:35, archived)
Thought as much.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:39, archived)
probably his life's greatest achievement

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:33, archived)
true

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:34, archived)
I reckon making oodles of money by marketing utterly soulless music to the general public
ought to deserve at least a grudging modicum of respect.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:35, archived)
On the other hand
He also produced the woeful 1993 WWF Wrestlemania album
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:36, archived)
I'll bet that's a musical triumph.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:44, archived)
It's music to full nelson naked to!™

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:46, archived)

֍
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:47, archived)
"woe woe... wrestlemania!"
hey, you're right!
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:59, archived)
do you?
I see
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:52, archived)
I don't approve of snake oil salesmen,
but I have to admire their ability to sell total shit and have people lap it up.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:01, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8168983
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:04, archived)
2/7
now nobody reply after me and someone start a new thread, cheers.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:52, archived)
fucking hell, that brb is a needy dickhead, innee?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:00, archived)
at least i'm aware of it
and don't project it onto anyone else
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 13:05, archived)
You fucking WANKER'S
Hi
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:38, archived)

jelly.b3ta.com/talk/8168924
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:41, archived)
useful post, that
worth a bookmark
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:50, archived)
Agreed

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:51, archived)
Bexley beer festival starts today

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:43, archived)
I went to a beer festival in Clapton once
Fucking awful
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:47, archived)
this was a long time ago, mind
I'm sure nowadays it'd be full of bearded lumberjack hipsters, this lot were the old skool 'Doritos and Maiden' type
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:49, archived)

in with
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:51, archived)
he likes a lot of Cream on top

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:55, archived)
Strange Poo, more like

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:56, archived)
in the Shite Room, more like

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:06, archived)
cripes
are you steering clear or has enough time passed to get back on it?
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:48, archived)
Might pop down for a few

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:00, archived)
WANKETTES

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:52, archived)
One day, Boyce will go to some dark, dingey record shop
and while browsing through the obscure 60's Doo-Wop section, he'll come across the only album The Wankettes ever recorded.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:55, archived)
I have a DJ gig coming up and as an excuse, I have bought fucking loads of records this week
I've had about 10 45s come through so far, and have another 4 due after the weekend. I fucking love it
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:59, archived)
just ordered another, cheeky

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:06, archived)
Seriously thinking about getting a turntable, and rescuing all the old records from my mum's place

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:20, archived)
bit of agadoo, eh?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:25, archived)
u shud lol

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 12:33, archived)
i had one last night
it was quite good
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:57, archived)
What's the shortest amount of time you've had a job?
I worked at the Asda's bakery for 6 hours, then quit.

Alt: worst job you've ever had
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:54, archived)

j kn

lol
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:55, archived)
haha, you looney

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:56, archived)
I'm a right character!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:57, archived)
You're certainly different, I'll give you that!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:57, archived)
Are you running the b3ta twitter account, now?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:59, archived)
I should, shouldn't I

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:00, archived)
If you promised to shut it down, yes.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:07, archived)
I think this shed is bigger than place we stayed at in Paris

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:55, archived)
Is this a "store all of the garden shit" type of shed,
or a comfy sort of shed that you'll intend to use as extra living space but only ever gets used by your kids and their mates when they need somewhere to smoke weed?
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:17, archived)
Storage
with an option to extend to a dartboard
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:38, archived)
always stuck with it even if it was shit
I've had temp jobs but never left before the contract finished.
The worst was probably working in a supermarket when I was a student.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:59, archived)
2 hours
Boss was a bit more "hands on "than I liked
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:59, archived)
did you report it?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:00, archived)
I was 16, there were only the two of us there and it was his shop
Would have been my word against his with no evidence
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:10, archived)
how "hands on" do you like?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:01, archived)
I like it pretty damn hands on

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:08, archived)
Handshake and possibly a hug
Groping definitely a no-no
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:12, archived)
I'm sorry to have to inform you that I am not able to offer the job at this time, Ms Monkey

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:18, archived)
Bugger

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:22, archived)
That'd be very hands on.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:23, archived)
let's just say that chicken dentistry is not as glamorous as it is made out to be

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:02, archived)
I got a job as a postman,
but quit before I'd even started, as I got offered a job with fewer early mornings and more sitting down.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:02, archived)
early start, early finish

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:03, archived)
makes a man healthy, wealthy and winnish

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:07, archived)
Had it not been the middle of winter, it might have been a more attractive prospect.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:08, archived)
can you rock the shorts though?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:13, archived)
I have calves to die for.
Well, I did at one time.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:22, archived)
nostalgic for your days in the veal slaughterhouse?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:25, archived)
I tried veal, once.
Didn't see what the fuss was about.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:39, archived)
when boy cows are born, most of them are slaughtered anyway, because they can't use them
Not eating them is just being wasteful. There.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:40, archived)
woah
hot take, coming through
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:49, archived)

quit before I'd even started, as I got offered a job with fewer early mornings and more sitting down I got the sack on the first day!
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:53, archived)

postman Mohel
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:02, archived)
Oh

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:05, archived)
Yeah, but the income was primarily tips.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:14, archived)
selling home cladding door to door
i managed a whole day of it then quit before the second shift
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:23, archived)
Pebbledashing is the last word in home improvement.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:26, archived)
unless you hyphenate it

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:29, archived)
"Oh my, good sir, your house is positively dashing!"

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:32, archived)
I imagine that selling of any kind is utterly horrible
and the few people that seem to enjoy it or are any good at it are the worst kind of wankers
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:34, archived)
Imagine being an estate agent

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:46, archived)
Ladypigs brother is an estate agent that used to be a travel agent.
Complete bellend
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:58, archived)
I bet
The amount of dishonesty I had to deal with from our estate agents was awful. Wouldn't want to do that again.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:04, archived)
you couldn't handle the truth

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:10, archived)
no thanks

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:07, archived)
what was so bad about asda bakery?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:24, archived)
he didn't quit he was sacked
for sticking yum yums up his arse
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:28, archived)
aha, suddenly this makes a lot more sense

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:29, archived)
^

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:43, archived)
Funnily enough, I bought some Yum Yums recently, for the first time in years
they weren't as good as I remember
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:57, archived)
they're too stodgy for me

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:58, archived)
I just didn't want to work with food, simple as that

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:45, archived)
yet you eat it
funny old world
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:00, archived)
Weird innit!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:02, archived)
i quite liked working in the co-op bakery
more so than stacking shelves or working the till anyway. getting up early was the problem
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:10, archived)
I went to watch the rugby world cup opening at lunch and never went back , natwest tower refurb I didn't make it through the site induction

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:45, archived)
Nice

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:54, archived)
Joy of having a trade, you can just fuck off and get another job the next day

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:57, archived)
was that after the IRA bombed it?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:57, archived)
Yeah around that time

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:00, archived)
that was me m8

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:13, archived)
Dirty protest?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:18, archived)
well you actually killed someone
I hope you're happy
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:21, archived)
surely that's what makes it worthwhile?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:22, archived)
happy as a sandboy m8

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:27, archived)
Few fellas I knew were doing a busbar service that day in the baltic exchange, a few go some good compo

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:28, archived)
I did a half day Saturday on a private job.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 10:57, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/8168860
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:07, archived)
Doesn't really work that though

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:19, archived)
Nationalise all the knobs.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:24, archived)
the knob?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:24, archived)
10 minutes. It was a blowjob!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:23, archived)
bit rough, was he?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:28, archived)
2 days as a kp in a shit kitchen staffed by cunts who didn't appreciate being told how shit their food tasted.
pasta isn't supposed to be a liquid. veg isn't supposed to taste of soap.
nobody wants burnt baked fish.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 11:54, archived)
Morning

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 7:40, archived)
Hi

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 7:53, archived)
Word

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:11, archived)
Morno

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 7:54, archived)
Muppsy

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:11, archived)
Happy shedmas x

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 7:56, archived)
good sheddings to you and your family

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:01, archived)
A national day of awning

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:04, archived)
Thanks mate. Love to you and all the family

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:11, archived)
we all want some sheddy pudding

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:32, archived)
when the shed shed robin goes bob bob bobbing along

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:12, archived)
yo

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:00, archived)
Big up

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:12, archived)
RIP UKIP

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:01, archived)
Some of my more naive liberal friends can't seem to understand why the death of UKIP hasn't seen a massive Tory swing.
Failing to grasp that even classic Labour voters of the estates are all racist scum too.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:12, archived)
Your friends are libtard cucks, m8

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:31, archived)
I hate living in libtardia

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:46, archived)
I've switched my allegiance to knights templar international

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:50, archived)
I hope you've changed your facebook avatar accordingly

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:50, archived)
thinking of getting one of these cool cloaks:
knightstemplarinternational.com/kti-regalia/
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:22, archived)
seems reasonable

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:29, archived)
My LARP group would love those!

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:36, archived)
you can borrow one of my spares

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:39, archived)
Cornish Nationalist Party for me

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:56, archived)
#KernowLyf

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:00, archived)
also
Nationalist

r s
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:08, archived)

Cornish nipple
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:12, archived)
Where do you get the nipples?

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:14, archived)
there's roughly 15 billion of them to choose from

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:20, archived)
Pasty Power.

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:09, archived)
Plops

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:46, archived)
the weather here has been as nice as it can be

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:49, archived)
Yeah, because people get banned for doing nothing wrong, all the time
www.portsmouth.co.uk/our-region/waterlooville/waterlooville-mum-banned-from-all-branches-of-rowlands-pharmacy-in-the-uk-1-8486397
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:50, archived)
I ain't dun nuffin

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:58, archived)
The look on her face

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:01, archived)
/r/punchablefaces

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:02, archived)

p l
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:05, archived)
lol

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:08, archived)
how angry can you get in a pharmacy, honestly

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:09, archived)
I dunno
My local ran out of toot sweets once, and I fucken kicked off, big time
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:15, archived)
well you're only human
mostly
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:23, archived)
cheers

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:26, archived)
Payday innit

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 8:50, archived)
I am always rich on the last day of the month when I get paid
and then poor on the first of the next when all my direct debits are taken.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:11, archived)
hey hi hello

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:07, archived)
+ I'm not alone, it's good to know

(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:09, archived)
Might have to show someone how to do my job, today.
I'm an incredibly bad teacher, so this won't go well.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:12, archived)

how to do my j my tiny kn

teach wank
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:17, archived)
I take offence at that.
My wanking skills are unparalleled.
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:38, archived)

my a +blow
(, Fri 4 May 2018, 9:36, archived)

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