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FEATURES: TOP TEN WEB GAMES

We love web games. They make our dreary lives seem worthwhile. Some are utter shyte, and some are dead good, so to save you the trauma of hours spent playing crap things, we've filtered them into this lovely top 10. All guaranteed to waste 5 minutes of your life in a fun and lovely way.



Kick Ups

Keep the ball in the air.
This game is extremely simple, but dangerously addictive. It is quite likely to give you RSI.
RSI Fact:
People who process Chickens are more likely to suffer RSI than other meat processors.

 
Mini Golf

It's golf. It's mini. It's Mini Golf
Nice simulation, playable and well executed.
Golf fact:
In May 2001 a torrential downpour of goldfish and Koi carp amazed golfers on a Wiltshire golf course.

 

Kill Sheep

Stunningly realistic livestock slaughter.
This Danish game is fantastically stupid and awful.
Sheep Death Fact:
Egyptian shepherd Mokhtar Adam Fadl was sleeping soundly beside his flock when he was shot dead - by one of his sheep. The animal killed Fadl by kicking his gun and accidentally firing it, police said.

 
Spider game

Catch flies.
Lovely graphics and movement.
Spider Fact:
In July 2001 Aaron Christopher Java, 24, of Grand Rapids, Minnesota was assaulted. His assailant attacked his penis with a Tarantula.

 

Lego Junkbot

Sinister Dead Animal Fact:
Freeze drying removes moisture from animal tissue - and thereby prevents the growth of bacteria - stopping putrification. With care & cleaning, your dried pet should out last your life time.

 
Yard invaders

Hand drawn black and white take on space invaders.
Very cute and original.
Yard Invader Fact:
predatorpee.com will sell you Coyote piss or similar to keep unwanted intruders out of your back yard.

 

Ant City

Cause mayhem with a giant magnifying glass.
Why burn ants when you can do it to people and cars?
Giant Things Fact:
In August 2000 a wholly intact human head was discovered inside a giant Cod being filleted for food in Northern Australia.

 
Slime Volleyball

Visually basic but very playable
Proof that you don't need high-tech to make a great web game.
Slime Fact:
Slime Mould exhibits primitive intelligence. In tests, it can find the shortest route through a maze.

 

Chicken wings are not for flying

Rescue the little chicks.
Incredibly cute. Beautifully made.
Chicken Fact:
56 years ago, Mike the chicken had his head chopped off with an axe. He survived for eighteen months.

 
Xiao Xiao Shoot 'em up

Stunning visually minimal interactive flash shooter.
Mystery Chinese artist does it again with this seminal game.
Gun Massacre Fact:
The recent massacre of the Nepalese Royal Family may well have been influenced by several prophesies of deaths and the fall of the dynasty this year.



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