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# This weeks compo reminded me of this...
made for "The Finalist" magazine some years back...


(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:54, Reply)
# All of the grandads are grumpy except one.


Click for bigger (80 kb)

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:54, Reply)
# I like
his tie
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:55, Reply)
# I like this :D

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:55, Reply)
# it's hard for him

clearly
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:33, Reply)
# every time he jiggles, my arm muscles twinge
EDIT: yay! shower time!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:34, Reply)
# hahahahaha
:D
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:34, Reply)
# ELITE FITNESS

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:43, Reply)
# I've seen him in many stances, but never as a weightlifter

woo!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:47, Reply)
# FUCK OFF WITH YOUR DULL WHINING WE DON'T WANT YOU HERE YOU CUNT GO BACK TO WHERE YOU CAME FROM
(woo!)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:50, Reply)
# hahaha...good stuff
:D
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:53, Reply)
# he seems quite happy about it.


sooperdooper
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:14, Reply)
# oh hi

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:17, Reply)
# Ohaio is hello in japanese.
trufax
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:20, Reply)
# I feel the need to share these things.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:23, Reply)
# "Takk" is "thankyou" in some Nordic languages.
Sometimes "Takke".
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:26, Reply)
# and is the name of a sigur ros album

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:33, Reply)
# in Maori it's kia ora /truest fax

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:26, Reply)
# Fanny is Chinese for 'translate'

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:31, Reply)
# I thought it was in America?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:35, Reply)
# Smiley smiley

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:17, Reply)
# O hai Mr Big mouth
Kthnxbai
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:20, Reply)
# he could hide a child in there
or a piglet.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:20, Reply)
# I'm surprised you're not wondering about the size of his tongue smash, I know I am.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:21, Reply)
# oh, i am
but that thought was eclipsed by the storage possibilities his mouth presents
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:25, Reply)
# are you not intrigued that his tongue appears to have a japseye?
edit: what's the proper word for japseye?
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:27, Reply)
# "Urethral opening"
(may be invented)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:30, Reply)
# i am now you've pointed it out
i have no idea what the real name for it is, but i am now in a good mood. i've changed the lightbulb in the bedroom, so i can now find my pyjamas.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:31, Reply)
# Lemonade grommit?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:31, Reply)
# :-)

edit: How rude of me, top woo to the original post!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:54, Reply)
# Glee gland.
ENGAGED!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:43, Reply)
# Well hello there

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:44, Reply)
# Greetings to you too, sirrah.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:49, Reply)
# Well, would he?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:11, Reply)
# would i put my wood where wood would put his wood?
if it was dark and i was well protected.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:20, Reply)
# Disconcerted Scenester.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:09, Reply)
# What is a scenester?
And why did someone dislocate his shoulder?
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:17, Reply)
# That's^ a scenester.
And because nobody likes them.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:18, Reply)
# I think he's depressed about Fall Out Boy splitting up
And look, he's halfway through shaving all his hair off just like Pete Wentz did. But he couldn't do it! :(
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:24, Reply)
# no, he just has a terrible haircut

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:26, Reply)
# Ah, OK then
Many scenesters do. Sometimes it doesn't pay to read too much into things, I guess.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:51, Reply)
# Isn't everyone a scenester? In that : we are all part of some scene.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:25, Reply)
# Yeah but he's
THAT kind of scenester. Emo kid. Whatever you call them.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:27, Reply)
# I call them "Colins".
Actually, I don't.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:31, Reply)
# Liar!
:]
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:32, Reply)
# Marion Mansell

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:44, Reply)
# dashing

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:03, Reply)
# Yay for olde time soldiers!

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:05, Reply)
# Yay indeed....

Amd woo to the one up there too ^^^^
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:14, Reply)
# More than likely bindun but here's my take on it
Photobucket

Really not happy with the hair though.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:52, Reply)
[challenge entry] i'm so very sorry

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:32, Reply)
# More like Edward Hands lol
;)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:35, Reply)
# indeed

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:37, Reply)
# :D

*risks another flood of these*

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:37, Reply)
# I'd do
Edward Edward Woodward Hands except I'm about to eat my dinner.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:40, Reply)
# hahaha
ace
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:48, Reply)
# Haha

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:49, Reply)
# Ewar Woowarhands

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:03, Reply)
# Ahem!
Ewar Woowarhans
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:08, Reply)
# Haha yes, sorry.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:42, Reply)
# :D

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:44, Reply)
# I love this one

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:02, Reply)
# there is good in all of us, Lad
well, not . .. . oh. your're right
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:36, Reply)
# This pic won't load for me
Where's it hosted?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:41, Reply)
# b3ta
:(

edit: i use the inbiult hosting for pics that i'm embarrassed to have made!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:48, Reply)
# Aha I can see the B3ta hosted pics now
I don't see why you're embarrassed. There's nothing wrong with you post.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:53, Reply)
# i like choppers

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:26, Reply)
# Arf
I'd hide those teeth from Prod if I were you.
He'll nab them faster than you can say supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:27, Reply)
# must be a story behind that?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:28, Reply)
# He lost his teeth last year in a big fight with Glasgow Rangers fans
All of them.
He cannot get new teeth until his gums heal completely.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:30, Reply)
# strangely enough I have a tooth coming out next tuesday

yes..it's the gay one at the back
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:40, Reply)
# and how monumentally shit is children in need
good cause....but jesus
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:41, Reply)
# Oh God
One of the reasons I'm glad not to be in Britain, actually. Stay in and you have really, really rubbish telly. Go out and once every five minutes someone shakes a bucket in your face.

"No, love, I put loads in the last bucket."
"GO ON IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE" [shake bucket in face]
"No, I put loads in the last one."
"IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE! YOU CAN AFFORD A DRINK CAN'T YOU?" [shake bucket in face]

Rinse and repeat for eight hours.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:44, Reply)
# yup gotta love wacky muggers

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:45, Reply)
# especially when they come in the pub for the fourth time

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:50, Reply)
# Thankfully it's no longer broadcast here

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:48, Reply)
# If it's a gay tooth
then I suggest you put it under your pillow for the tooth fairy.

BOOM BOOM!

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:49, Reply)
# pffh

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:53, Reply)
# youve given me ideas for images here

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:55, Reply)
# HA!
;)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:28, Reply)
# no reason

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:29, Reply)
# STILL the best thing ever on b3ta. EVER.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:32, Reply)
# it was a fair old shock to the system the first time I saw it, for sure!
:)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:46, Reply)
# nobody leaves til we have a reason

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:34, Reply)
# It's because he is Dutch
It's all the cheese, tulips and windmills that's made him a bit... different.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:57, Reply)
# bwaaaaaaaaaahaha

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:29, Reply)
# this is reminding me of real monsters
oblina
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:58, Reply)
# rob's put on a bit of weight

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:15, Reply)
[challenge entry] Mr. Scissors, the famous celebrity. What? You've never heard of him?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:17, Reply)
# HAHAHA

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:21, Reply)
# Don't tell me to shut up when I've not said anything
Cheeky git.
p.s. Your pic made me snigger.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:25, Reply)
# sracist!

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:28, Reply)
# :)

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:29, Reply)
# This is not a typo....


Plácido Domingo = 1/5
José Carreras = 1/5
Lucíano Pavarotti = 3/5
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:58, Reply)
# his turnip is now safe
pavarotti can't lust after it any more
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:00, Reply)
# Ha!
Like Pavarotti wants vegetables.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:01, Reply)
# they're edible, aren't they?
besides, he looked like just the type to enjoy a sneaky cauliflower cheese
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:04, Reply)
# I had a dream last night with Mick Johnno off of brookside in it

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:25, Reply)
# What happened?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:34, Reply)
# Makes sense really

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:04, Reply)
# Of course.
The truth always makes sense....
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:06, Reply)
# Pavarotti tends to pee a lot before going on stage

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:04, Reply)
# This has perplexed my noggin.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:07, Reply)
# "If you have a noggin.........get it PERPLEXED"
...that's what my granny used to say
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:13, Reply)
# That's because he eats a lot of PISS EGG

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:11, Reply)
# Dear The Dutch Inventor Mediocre,
I would like to enquire as to the currency of which your Piss Egg, as advertised on b3ta.com on Friday 20th November 2009, is for sale?

I look forward to a prompt response.

Kind Regards,

Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop!

Inventor of Uzbekistan
Inventor of the Canoe
Canal Crossing Record Holder.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:14, Reply)
# It's in pesos

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:20, Reply)
# Ill just stick with good old plain piss

its cheaper
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:34, Reply)
# Hahah top arseage!

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:26, Reply)
# Flamingo Damingo is my fav

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:25, Reply)
# oh hai, popular tenor

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:29, Reply)
# Kicking bacon offside


ps: not made by me, just a bacon entry
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:45, Reply)
# BACON SHOES!
*wants very fucking hard*
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:46, Reply)
# Ha ha ha... I bought edible shoes.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:46, Reply)
# Oh fuck yeah!

Re: your ps: boo!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:48, Reply)
# just don't ask the dog go get 'em
:)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:48, Reply)
# I hope these are smoked.
Very rashional/rashionable footwear.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:51, Reply)
# Dude its BACON DAY
Post it here
b3ta.com/links/BACON_COMPETITION_RIGHT_HERE_RIGHT_NOW_ITS_TIME_TO_FACE_THE_BACON
And you have a chance of winning wonderfull prizes :D
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:52, Reply)
# I am not the original source
of this bacon entry, so must decline
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:57, Reply)
# Seems like just the thing for /links though

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:57, Reply)
# Well yes, its the most bacon /link
Just post it below, there only a few entrys of that b3tans have made thereselfs
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:04, Reply)
# every day is bacon day

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:04, Reply)
# lully
but not made by you, even bacon day has rules.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:54, Reply)
# why am i looking at your dog?

(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:25, Reply)
# tshirt hell are running a photoshop contest.
put people with their tshirts on into history or put them on historical people.



fun times.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:19, Reply)
# Nice!
May give that a go.

What's the prize?

Why is his left arm invisible though? ;)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:19, Reply)
# Because he's gay.
What?
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:21, Reply)
# That's the hand he wanks with.
In this case, it makes YOU blind instead of him.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:22, Reply)
# ahh, "The Stranger"
www.sherdog.net/forums/f5/fwapping-using-stranger-technique-655428/
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:42, Reply)
# I try that whenever I wake up with a numb arm, but I can never finish because I can't get a good grip.
I end up having to use both hands just to hold on.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:43, Reply)
# just ask a stranger
"nicely"
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:46, Reply)
# i'm quite strange

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:47, Reply)
# I'm quite stranger.

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:48, Reply)
# i know

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:52, Reply)
# i just looked at it and though that.
that shadow is meant to be the bend in his arm.

other answers included: because I'm shit in the 'shop :)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:37, Reply)
# nice
:)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:22, Reply)
# How inappropriate. Much like T-Shirt Hell.
Woo!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:22, Reply)
# arf.."it's history Jim,but not as we know it"
:D
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:37, Reply)
[challenge entry] sorry about the size....


it's a hard one to photograph. spent an age on this, and i have the fear that it wasn't really worth it!

it is though, a full on celebrity cut out doll at least! :)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:11, Reply)
# Ha ha ha!
Fantastic :D
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:13, Reply)
# Above and beyond the call of duty.
15 points.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:14, Reply)
# you can't really see..
but he has a halo and everything.

it's a slot together angel of the north structure. :)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:20, Reply)
# Fantastic :D

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:21, Reply)
# arf, GJM

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:18, Reply)
# this is good

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:18, Reply)
# 3D Magic Forsyth Figure...

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:20, Reply)
# Fucking hell :)
That's great work there. Big click from me!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:21, Reply)
# Hahaha wonderful!

(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:21, Reply)
# pfft
I am currently in the surreal situation of hoping brucie doesn't die soon

its a long story...
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:23, Reply)
# He'll die as soon as you stop thinking about it.
Garunteed.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:25, Reply)
# I hope he goes while doing one of his tap dance things live on strictly.
It seems right.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:27, Reply)
# do tell, sound like there must be funnies in there somewhere...
here's a close up of his 'bits'


(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:25, Reply)
# Top quality work, moke.
Do you make stick on suits and a different variety of speech bubble phrases? :)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:34, Reply)
# i could do..
"nothing for a pair"
"cuddly toy"
"good game, good game"
"where's my dinner you venezuelan whore?"

on another note, i have the house to myself* for a chage, as the mrs has gone to meadowhall. woohoo! what should i do?

*not entirely to myself. i have my sleeping 9 month old daughter, and a sea bass.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:45, Reply)
# stick your cock in the sea bass
you know you want to
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:47, Reply)
# i would,
but i filleted it already. :(

i could always just smuooh up the flesh and use it for some sort of cold, pungent posh wank.... but i fear the pin bones.

imagine explaining that to the doc.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:55, Reply)
# it's still got a mouth, hasn't it?
or have you cut the head off?
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:59, Reply)
# well,
that's usually what you do when you fillet a fish! :)

i could just use the head i suppose...
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:04, Reply)
# You've done one of your things for the bbc, which involves a dead Brucie.
And if he dies then they won't be able to use it due to it not being appropriate?
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:26, Reply)
# nearly
they are holding it back until this strictly series ends for fear of bruce-anger. it doesn't involve him dying, but i'd feel a bit weird showing it if he did peg out.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:57, Reply)
# not worth it?
NOT WORTH IT??? This is astounding!
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:31, Reply)
# cheers!
:)

is how it is made

jpeg of the guidelines, should anyone want them bigger/ to use themselves
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:40, Reply)
# *clicks*
but you forgot to do his reputed monster schlong
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:35, Reply)
# lol!
i'll bear it in mind for future brucing. :)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:41, Reply)
# strangely
the thought of bruce forsyth with a huge cock is not giving me the horn :(
(, Fri 20 Nov, 19:43, Reply)
# you've actually made him more menacing
bravo

:D
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:45, Reply)
# OK that's the winner.
Yes. Yes it is.

if I were the judge. Which I'm not.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:51, Reply)
# haha!
cheers! think that this might be the best response i've had for any of the junk i pump out. :)
(, Fri 20 Nov, 20:56, Reply)
# Junk?!
Give over. Absolutely give over. I knows junk when I sees it and you don't put out junk. So there. Ner.
(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:01, Reply)
# WYH and a *click*

(, Fri 20 Nov, 21:28, Reply)

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