we love the web
email us
Best of the Board


(prodigy69, Thu 3 Dec, 23:12, 30 replies)


(rogan, Thu 3 Dec, 11:23, 25 replies)
more fluff

(elvisweathercock, Tue 1 Dec, 21:51, 57 replies)


(pzyko, Tue 1 Dec, 15:08, 22 replies)
They misjudged their target audience with the new release

(HappyToast, Mon 30 Nov, 19:46, 14 replies)


(prodigy69, Sun 29 Nov, 22:52, 12 replies)
Evening. Long time no post.

(FoldsFive Gold Rings, Sun 29 Nov, 17:56, 15 replies)
bad hair day :(

(elvisweathercock, Sat 28 Nov, 12:13, 14 replies)
Fear them!

(Ninj, Wed 25 Nov, 9:31, 12 replies)
Um

(Easter Egg, Tue 24 Nov, 16:52, 18 replies)
XML feeds
Search B3ta

Buy B3ta Book on Amazon

Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 407 - extremely late newsletter as I did a 5 min talk at the UK Webbies thing. Was very nervous about doing it, so once done, I consumed all the free booze in the building and now I'm ill. Still, the links are good.
Read newsletter 407
published by rob on 4th Dec at 6pm
Question of the Week
Failed Projects
You start off with the best of intentions, but through raging incompetence, ineptitude or the plain fact that you're working in IT, things go terribly wrong and there's hell to pay. Tell us about the epic failures that have brought big ideas to their knees. Or just blame someone else.
Read all 106 stories (open)
asked by Scaryduck on 3rd Dec at 2pm
Challenge
Jesus on Tour
According to The News, Jesus may have visited Britain. What did he come to see? Show us what he got up to on our dingy island, or what he might be doing now if he were to suddenly turn up again.
See all 202 images (open)
set by Fraser on 2nd Dec at 6pm
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 406, out now. Full of the good stuff this week, Dan Bull's open letter to Peter Mandelson, Cheespedia (it's like Sickipedia but about cheese) and some guy who drinks 100 shots. All harmless fun and ideal for kids too.
Read newsletter 406
published by rob on 27th Nov at 4pm
Question of the Week
Presents
What are you buying your loved ones this Christmas? We're looking for inspiration and reckon a big share-a-thon of ideas will help everyone buy better gifts this year.

BTW: If your family reads B3ta and you're worried about giving the game away then tell us what you bought last Christmas.
Read all 276 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 26th Nov at 12pm
Challenge
Desktop Icon Art
This week's challenge is to make a picture using the icons on your desktop. Confused? Here's your inspiration via Lee Blackwood. Easy.
See all 117 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 25th Nov at 9pm
Sickipeda Comedy Night 2.0, 9th Dec 2009, Old Blue Last. If you want to try your hand at stand up comedy then get in touch ASAP.
posted by rob on 25th Nov at 12pm
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 405, out now - it's got a great song from Joel about Ben Goldacre, I'm personally loving the cut out and keep image challenge and some really, really dreadful attempts at jokes. Sorry.
Read newsletter 405
published by rob on 20th Nov at 5pm
Question of the Week
PE Lessons
For some they may have been the highlight of the school week, but all we remember is a never-ending series of punishments involving inappropriate nudity and climbing up ropes until you wet yourself.

Tell us about your PE lessons and the psychotics who taught them.
Read all 443 stories (closed)
asked by chthonic on 19th Nov at 5pm
Challenge
Celebrity Cutout Dolls
This week's challenge is to create cut-out-and-keep dolls based on celebrities, like these lovely ones. For extra points, photograph their exploits during the hours of fun they'll almost certainly provide.
See all 150 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 18th Nov at 8pm
Newsletter
b3ta newsletter 404 - we couldn't quite bring ourselves to do the file not found gag as at least 50 people suggested we did, but 404 fans we DID use it for the subject title. Also worth checking Joel's bucket of shit song - I promise you - the events of this week feel exactly like carrying a bucket of shit around everywhere I go. Woo hoo - see you next week kids!
Read newsletter 404
published by rob on 13th Nov at 4pm
Challenge
When Baddies turn Good... and Vice Versa
Back in 2003 we ran a classic "when baddies turn good" challenge, and now we're revisiting it. Also welcome are pictures of the opposite, when goodies turn bad.
See all 357 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 12th Nov at 8pm
Question of the Week
Family Feuds
Pooster tells us that a relative was once sent to the shops to buy an onion, while the rest of the family went on a daytrip while he was gone. Meanwhile, whole sections of our extended kin still haven't got over a wedding brawl fifteen years ago – tell us about families at war.
Read all 235 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 12th Nov at 12pm
Sickipedia comedy night, tonight at 8pm - details on the flyer. About 12 or so new comics will be trying their hand at stand-up. Should be interesting. - thanks to everyone who turned up and made a success of this night. It was absolutely rammed and I think a great time was had by all. Special mention to Mushybees whose act was extraordinary and deserves much more exposure and also Richard Tyrone Jones who was brilliant. Richard also has a book out I think I remember telling him I'd try and make people buy it - so here goes buy this man's book, he's a funny chap. Thanks to everyone else too.
posted by rob on 10th Nov at 8am
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 403, out now - actually sent vaguely on time for once. A number of reasons 1. Very busy with real work so I've had to plan my time carefully this week - ironic that being busy makes me more efficient and 2. The ad sales on the newsletter have been shite recently but this week we had a proper paid client so thought I owed it to them not to get it out at 7:30pm. Anyway, good week editorially I think. Stuff on Richard Dawkins, lots of fluffy pics and the YouTube crossfader which is genius on a stick. Toodle-pip and I'll go back to editing kittens - see you soon!
Read newsletter 403
published by rob on 6th Nov at 12pm
Question of the Week
Teenage Crushes - Part Two
Freddie Woo writes: I've still got weird feelings for a well-known female TV presenter from the 1980s. I'm now in my forties, work in the same building as her and she follows me on a number of social networking sites. And now, she knows about it.

Tell us about the teenage crushes that still make you go wobbly.
Read all 430 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 5th Nov at 11am
Challenge
How History Was Faked
Everyone knows that the moon landing was faked, but what if other things were? The ascent of Everest? Germany's invasion of Poland? Show us how famous historical events were faked.
See all 254 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 4th Nov at 11pm
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 402 - out now. This week announcing the Sickipedia comedy night, our own personal obsession with TV Tropes and your chance to wear a vulva necklace.
Read newsletter 402
published by rob on 30th Oct at 4pm
Question of the Week
Rubbish Towns
I once went to Basildon. It was closed, I got chased by a bunch of knuckle-dragged yobs until I was lost in a maze of concrete alleyways and got food poisoning off pie. Tell us about the awful places you've visited or have your home.

Thanks to SpankyHanky for the suggestion
Read all 569 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 29th Oct at 11am
Challenge
New Ways To Deliver The Mail
As the postal strikes bring the country to its knees, it's obvious we need new ways to deliver the mail. Show us what they are. The nation will thank you.
See all 250 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 28th Oct at 9pm
Vote for a Change UPDATE - lots of you are asking when the VFAC image challenge finishes. Well, they're scooting up and down the country at the moment and aren't all in one room to agree as to which is the winner. So the truthful answer is I don't know, but maybe the end of this month. But don't hold me to it! Sorry. On the up side - enter whilst you still can and there is still the chance to win a laptop. - UPDATE! Vote for a change have announced winners.
posted by rob on 28th Oct at 7pm
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 401 - good stuff this week, there's a topical Nick Griffin thingie, a lovely Windows 7 party and hidden away towards the bottom an interview we did with the BBC about reaching newsletter 400. Gosh - tuck in.
Read newsletter 401
published by rob on 23rd Oct at 3pm
Question of the Week
Sexual fetishes
Rubber wetsuits. Knee-high boots. Nuclear-powered clockwork cucumbers. Dressing up as Pingu whilst reading out loud from the works of Dan Brown. What floats your boat? Or what fetishes have you encountered? Suggestion via crackhouseceilidhband.
Read all 421 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 22nd Oct at 1pm
Challenge
Corporate Logos That Tell The Truth
Companies spend millions designing logos that represent their corporate identity. We'd like you to redesign them so they tell the truth. Ooh, and as a special bonus, the top three voted images will receive 36" canvas prints from canvasRus.
See all 547 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 21st Oct at 7pm
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter issue 400 - arguably we should have made a special edition, but every edition is special when it's the B3ta Newsletter.
Read newsletter 400
published by rob on 16th Oct at 4pm
Have you been to a facebook party? - my wife is researching a TV documentary about that Facebook party stuff that was all over the tabloids recently. You know, where people stick up some party details on Facebook and then 100s of random people turn up. She's looking for people who've had this happen to them or have been to such events so she can stick them on TV. If this sounds like you then email her on lucy_reese33 AT yahoo.co.uk
posted by rob on 16th Oct at 2pm
Question of the Week
I don't understand the attraction
Smaug says: Ricky Gervais. Lesbian pr0n. Going into a crowded bar, purely because it's crowded. All these things seem to be popular with everybody else, but I just can't work out why. What leaves you cold just as much as it turns everyone else on?
Read all 901 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 15th Oct at 2pm
Challenge
The Censorship Challenge
This week's challenge is a bit different: use black censorship bars / pixelization to make something look much ruder than it really is.
See all 515 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 14th Oct at 5pm
Newsletter
B3ta newsletter 399 out now - featuring a lovely song about lamb, an interview with an Irish man and a small parrot named John. BTW: We occasionally lie about parrots.
Read newsletter 399
published by rob on 9th Oct at 4pm
Eoin Colfer interview up - yep he actually answered your childish questions. Good on him. Your questions for Eoin Colfer wanted - Eoin Colfer - best known for the Artemis Fowl series of books has a new project: he's writing a sequel to Douglas Adams's Hitchhikers books. Controversial stuff. He's agreed to answer your questions. Even awkward ones. So feel free to ask him whatever you like. UPDATE: no more questions please. The thread is going over to Eoin now - hope he's not offended by the rather alarming questions.
posted by rob on 9th Oct at 12pm
Question of the Week
Celebrities part II
Five years ago, we asked if you've ever been rude to a celebrity, or have been on the receiving end of a Z-List TV chef's wrath. By popular demand, it's back - if you have beans, spill them.
Read all 480 stories (closed)
asked by Scaryduck on 8th Oct at 1pm
Challenge
If America Were Still British
Since Great Britain and the US separated in 1776, the Americans have very much gone their own way, inventing both canned cheese and obesity. But what if America were still British? Show us, using Photoshop devilry.
See all 492 images (closed)
set by Fraser on 8th Oct at 8am