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NEWSLETTER: ISSUE 101: "WHERE'D THE CHEESE GO?"

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This Week:
* ANIM - Stickboy slim
* SWEARING - Neil Armstrong
* CHEESE - Ween

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___/  _ |/_ </ __/ __ |      "We're saving the
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_|       web ... together"

B3ta email 101 - 22 Aug 2003

Read this issue in your browser:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue101/

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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK 
  Sticks, Moons, Cheeses, Tattoos, Twunts & Liars

  >> Stick boy slim <<
  "I've made a Flash version of Fatboy Slim's Weapon 
  Of Choice video," writes Stick Figure Ninja,
  "the one where Christopher Walken dances, but
  used a stick figure instead. It took bloody
  ages." Jesus Christ! Looks like he's lost weight too.
http://homepage.ntlworld.com/gaz18jf/weapon-of-choice.html


  >> Man on the fucking moon <<
  Did you read that Onion story a few years back?
  The one with the "Holy Shit - Man Walks on Fucking
  Moon" headline? Fraser has improved the work
  with visuals. 
http://www.blogjam.com/neil_armstrong/


  >> Cheese advert <<
  Heard of Ween? They're like an ugly version
  of They Might Be Giants. Last year they made
  a jingle for a Pizza Hut commercial. It was
  rejected, God knows why, it's proper bo.
  Davelog has attempted to recreate the lost
  advert. But forgot the pizza. 
http://www.davelog.com/cheesego.html


  >> Bloke gets b3ta tattoo. Again. <<
  Newsletter readers might not be familiar with
  "The Fear." It's an in-joke on our messageboard,
  that doesn't mean much to the outside world. So
  it would be a really good idea to get it
  tattooed on your leg. Yes. A really good idea.
http://b3ta.com/board/1807955


  >> Jamie Oliver Vs Aphex Twin <<
  Jamie Oliver must regret the invention of the
  internet. First there was the Fat Tongue 
  photoshopping, then last month's fake
  cookery malarkey, and now? Simon Mediapill
  has made him sing like a twat.
http://www.mediapill.com/features/fun_arena/come2jamie.mov


  >> Is this man a liar? <<
  "Recently, I had too much time on my hands,"
  simpers Mare, "So I decided to see how many
  empty, untitled browser windows I could open
  on my Mac." He's certainly got too much time
  available, but somehow we don't believe the total
  he got to... was Photoshop involved? You decide.
http://homepage.mac.com/mare/safari.html


  >> Mong hangman <<
  Finding Hangman too hard? Do your friends laugh
  as you desperately flail around the alphabet
  trying to guess the words before your stick man
  gets lynched? This is a stupid gag, but it made
  us smile.
http://www.windowlicker.com/03/other/hangman.php


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: SITES IN BRIEF 
  Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates.

  >> Is spacker offensive? <<
  The BBC have been spending the license payers
  money on a survey to discover what words the
  disabled find offensive. "I just love the
  window-licker one!" taps out a spaz with their
  head stick, "I'll be using that with a couple
  of disabled friends next week."
http://www.bbc.co.uk/ouch/yourspace/worstwords/


  >> FHM Photo lies <<
  We all know about the level of photo trickery
  that goes into creating the lovely ladies you
  see in magazines, but it's an eye opener to
  see the before and after pics.
http://homepage.mac.com/gapodaca/digital/bikini/index.html


  >> Butch Mushroom Game <<
  This is great. You're, like, a mushroom, like,
  and you have to eat insects by randomly bashing
  at the arrow keys on your computer. What could
  be better? Nothing. We're too excited for words
  by this thing.
http://www.orangegray.com/butch01.html


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: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
  Results from the Double Take Challenge

  Each week we run a competition to test your
  creative skills. We set a challenge and you
  open Photoshop and mess with our heads.

  Last week we wanted pictures that would make
  you double take. We got over 770 entries, a
  huge number of which we couldn't see what had
  been done to them. Oh well:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/doubletake/

  We asked the B3ta boarder who came up with the
  idea, 'Zac McFlimby' to judge the entries as it
  was all their fault - here are his 3 faves.

  Mr McFlimby writes -


  #1 "Er... Mr President... - This has everything
  I'd hoped for in the competition - it's subtle,
  clever, well shopped and best of all... funny!
  (Rogan)
http://b3ta.com/board/1789717

  #2 "The romantic evening was a disaster - I don't
  think many will disagree with this choice.
  Nice idea perfectly executed.(Threepwood )
http://b3ta.com/board/1805278

  #3 "The tower of leaning Pisa - For me, a real
  double-take." (Darryn.R)
http://b3ta.com/board/1801070

  "And can I give a special mention to The Kaiser
  for breaking up the headfuck that was judging this
  competition by making me laugh out loud:"
http://b3ta.com/board/1792564


>> This Weeks Challenge <<

  This week, the B3ta Challenge Dictator came
  round and growled, "Photoshop the Klan" in a
  vaguely threatening manner.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/klan/


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: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
  Follow-ups on previous stories.

  * STATESMANorSKATESMAN MEDIA BONANZA - 
    "It's been a very busy week," writes
    Jason Whiley, "so far the site has been
    featured in the Guardian - 3 times, The
    Mirror, The Daily Mail, and the BBC News.
    I also had enquiries from The Times Education
    Supplement, The Telegraph, The Face,
    Yahoo, and The BBC Politics Show (TV) -
    unfortunately I can't go on telly on Sunday,
    because I have go and see my Gran."
http://www.statesmanorskatesman.co.uk/


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: STAR IN NEXT WEEK'S ISSUE

  Make something cool and tell us about it. If
  you are in it then people will see your stuff.

  Things we'd really like to see include

  * Google "pickelhaube". Get creative.

  * Snuff battle re-enactments.

  * Monkeys: they're due to be cool again
    this autumn.

  Send contributions to http://www.b3ta.com/mailus/

  BTW: If you've sent something in that hasn't
  been featured then don't be put off - we look
  at everything you send us.


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  THANKS: 

  This issue was edited by Rob Manuel with 
  Mike Trinder.
  Links sent in by RedQueen, Idyll & Lizard.
  Additional linkage by Fraser Lewry.
  Board research by Fnord.
  Top tippery from vidbones.
  Image challenge handled by Mike Trinder.
  Proofing by the fucking b4ta dwarfs. (69561)

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  HANDY TIP:
  Peanut butter removes chewed gum from hair,
  rugs, just about anything. It also makes
  everything smell like peanut butter.  Never
  tried the crunchy kind though, but it does work.

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