NEWSLETTER: "TO BE VIEWED WITH YOUR CHROME://FLAGS FLOWN AT HALF MAST"
This Week:
* VIDEO - Liz Truss being stupid
* CHALLENGE - Welcome our new King via Photoshop
* GO ON OPEN IT - For the best of Fesshole bit
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________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're flushing the
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | the web down the
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| bog... together"
B3ta email 831 - 09 Sep 2022
Read this issue wearing black tie.gif
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue831
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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE MADE THIS WEEK
Other than tears for their own terrible lives
* PM LIZ TRUSS IS AN IDIOT, Eclectech writes, "I
made a stupid video combining the Pork Markets
speech with 'My First PMQs' flash cards. It is a
pretty shoddy editing job, but made me laugh
quite a lot while I was making it so..."
https://eclectech.co.uk/nonsense/myfirstpmqs
* AI TORY MPS - Churchilljosef writes, "This
account on Twitter @NonExistingTory is something
I've recently set up. I was refreshing my way
through 'This Person Does Not Exist' and when I
see a Tory I download it, I've got loads of them
in a folder and a python script I found on
github posts one a day around 6pm to the
account."
https://twitter.com/NonExistingTory
* NETFLIX CLOSEDOWN - Scary writes, "Inspired by
last week's newsletter, here's what happens when
you're watching Netflix at 2am and it closes
down for the night."
https://b3ta.com/links/Netflix_Closedown
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: HEBTROCO SPONSORSHIP
Buy some clothes
Each week we beg you to buy some clothes from
our sponsors Hebtro so that they don't cancel
the cheque and force us to start an OnlyFans. So
dig deep and buy some lovely jeans or a jacket.
They even sell black jeans if you want to be in
mourning for the death of good content on the
internet.
https://hebtro.co/
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: FESSHOLE
Your confessions fesses up for shit lols
* TUBE PUBES - "Missed getting on the tube that
was blown up at Kings Cross station in the 7/7
London Underground bombings by seconds, because
I didn't run for it as I was tired from staying
up late fixing a mates laptop that was infected
with viruses from him trying to find free porn."
* KNITTING PUBES - "I read on a knitting site in
a thread about superstitions that if you weave a
hair from your head into your knitting, the
wearer of the item will love you forever. I'm
not superstitious but I always knit a hair into
anything I knit for my children and
grandchildren."
* SEX LIST - "At Tesco the other week I asked my
BF to check the notes in my phone for a shopping
list I had written. He found a long list of
names and asked me what it was. I told him it
was a list of potential baby names I like, but
it's actually everyone I've ever shagged."
Follow the terrible account because if you don't
angels will reap your soul.
https://twitter.com/fesshole/
Buy the fucking book. Well it's not out yet,
pre-buy it if that's a thing.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/18041903...
Buy tickets for the Xmas show which is on the
21st of Dec and not 23rd as we've been claiming
for some reason. The info has always been
correct on tickets, if not the odd tweet.
https://www.designmynight.com/london/whats-on/come...
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: IT'S THE IRREGULAR BEATLES CORNER
Coz we're old now so it's Beatles & WW2
* BEATLES DIRECTOR INTERVIEW - Chris from Eggpod
has interviewed Michael Lindsay-Hogg on
directing The Beatles’ Let it Be movie. Eggpod
has upped the quality of their guests somewhat
considering that the first ever episode was with
your editor.
https://www.marklewisohn.net/evolver-62/
* SHOW - We were delighted to be given press
tickets to the new Mark Lewisohn show Evolver
and it is our recommendation that you should get
a ticket. Your brain will be STUFFED with
fascinating stories and research. Only three
dates available then it's off.
https://www.marklewisohn.net/evolver-62/
* QUIZ - Play that heardle music guessing game
but with Beatles songs. Finally a quiz that
we're good at.
https://beadle.gg/
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: SITES IN BRIEF
Print now, for when you can't afford the web
* MOON GAME - Someone has made it so you can
play a game of Lunar Lander whilst waiting for
huge files to copy. Now just need them to make
a game of Breakout for when you're defragging
your Pentium's hard drive.
https://github.com/Sanakan8472/copy-dialog-lunar-l...
* TEMPERATURE GAME - Part of us wonders if the
dev is actually aware that Hot or Not was a big
thing on the old internet, or if they're young
and the title is just a coincidence. This time,
you're choosing which of two places is currently
the hottest. A version where you choose between
the temperature of the same place now and a few
decades ago could make for a bleak remix that
gets bleaker every year.
https://hotornot.guissmo.com
* SHEEP GAME - Listen to a bit of Bach whilst
working out the necessary geometry to pen in
your sheep. The ten people who have heard Safe
As Sheep by Harry Hill can sing "I just want to
talk to a human being" along to it, and have
that as an earworm for hours.
https://sixrobin.itch.io/sheepmaysafelygraze
* CARS MUST DIE - Very satisfying video of
digital cars failing to cope with a pit.
https://b3ta.com/links/Cars_VS_Square_Pit
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: IMAGE CHALLENGE
New Public Information
Here's the best images from last week:
* A POSTER FIT FOR ALL OFFICES - from Chumps
https://b3ta.com/board/11375453
* A TRIBUTE TO OUR SADLY DEPARTED HOME SEC -
from Octo
https://b3ta.com/board/11375454
* PORN FUN - from Plankton
https://b3ta.com/board/11376115
* See all the other images from the 'New Public
Information' challenge:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/newpublicinfo/popular
>> This week: King Charles <<
There's going to be a new King, you know what
that means?.. merchandise! Get in there early
with your commemorative Charles III plates and
posters.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/kingcharles/popular
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: PATREON THANKS
We love all these people. Almost romantically.
*HEBTROCO* *JAMES O'BRIEN* *KATE* *MARK
MCCREADIE* *MR PHIL DONNELLY* *SHOWRAT* *SIMON
JAMES* *STOOBERT*
24-7 DEATH, ALAN CHARLTON, ALISTAIR, BRIAN
EELES, CHRIS BLAKENEY, CHRIS CARLINE, CHRIS
LOCKE, CRISS MORENO, IAN SHEEN, JAIMIE
VANDENBERGH, MARK ADAMSON, RICHARD BARCLAY,
SPAZZCAPTAIN, WENDY GOODE, NAT KING COLESLAW,
ALBERT MARSHMALLOW, DANIEL MUDFORD, CARL DENCH
Ed Zitron, Eugenie vT, Tom Dolan, Tom Wright,
lee burnett, Richard Matthias, @mattdawhit, Adam
Atack, Adam Cooney, Adam Lloyd, Adrian
Woodfield, Al Davidson, Albion Gray, Andy
Storrar, Andy Tillett, Andy Webber, Anna,
Anne-Marie Scott, Ben Watson, Bertram Wooster,
blossomshed, Carl Morgan, Catherine McAllister,
Chris Evans, Chris Shaw, Craig Tonks, Damien
Smith, Dan Stott, Daniel Brown, Dave Nattriss,
Dave Tickle, David Ault, David Catley, David
Gardiner, David King, David Mills, Derek Law,
Dominic Haigh, Emma Lay, Eric von Borstel, Faith
H. Martin, Fiona James, Fraser Lewry, Gaynor
Clarkson, Gia Milinovich, Greg Neilson, Gus
Nicol, Iain, Iain Brassington, Iain Fuller, Iain
Ruxton, Ian Beveridge, Ivan Kelly, James
Donnelly, James Kerry-Barnard, Jane Baker, Jason
Stewart, Jerry Quartley, Jim Dabell, Jim
Frayling, Jim MacArthur, Jim Woodward, Joe
McNally, Joe Simmonds, John Faragher, John
Foster, John Hammersley, John Matthews, Jude
Evans, Jm McNven, Kate Devlin, Kev Adams, Konrad
Petrusewicz, Martin Beer, Martin Holloway,
Martin Peache, matsimpsk, Matt Buchanan, Matt
Drewry, Matthew Collinge, Matthew Forman,
Matthew Morris, Matthew Wilkes, midnightrambler,
mil jamieson, Neil de Carteret, Nick Ross,
OBiW4N SHiNOBi, oliver bewes, Paul Cherry, Paul
Smith, Paul Westerman, Peter Ashtray, Peter
Coombe, peter wouda, Philip Kinchington,
pookong, Rich Pope, Richard Beckett, Rob Mahon,
Rob Vincent, Robbie Lesiuk, Ross Carter,
RossOverThere, Saleem Ahmad, Scott S. Kramer,
sean casely, Simon Cowan, Simon Holmes, Simon
McDougall, Simon waterfall, Stephen Waller,
Steve Anglesey, Steven Smith, Stuart Ashen, Tim
Jokl, Tim Mouncer, Tim Weaver, Tom Crick, Tom
Rees-Williams, Tom Ryan, TownsendsPublisher, Wil
Hadden, Will Goulden, AuntieSash Hazlewood,
Byron Geoffrey Farrow, Chef Twat, Chris Gough,
Chris Whitworth, Craig Turner, Daniel Chote,
Fergus McKay, fourstar, Geoff Tidey, Geoffrey
Balme, Graham Licence, James Macinnes, John
Higgs, Jonty Wareing, Mick Curtis, Rhys Wynne,
Rob Affleck, Chris Saunders, George Preston,
James O'Malley, Martin Davies, Mike Middleton,
Bex Cook, Hannah Chubb, Ben Ward, James Pearson,
Shane McHugh, Stevey Garland, Ciarn R, Craig
Liddell, Helen Gaskell, Christopher Orr, Will
Moody, Nick Morgan, Ben Brice, David Green,
Justin Brett, Louise Allen, Robin, Gavin Tommey,
Stuart Richards, Tobie Fysh, Pete, Carl Mesner
Lyons, Chris Johnson, Emma Sykes, Jan Spielhoff,
Mike Congreve, Sean Flanagan, Tom Freke, Sam
Anderson, Jess Baker, Adam Beardwood, David
Stark, Julie Brumlik, Alastair Dodd, Alexandre
Strube, Andrew Robinson, Andy Candler, Connor
Parslow, Craig Naples, Daniel Moeller, Duncan
STrickland, Harry, Irene Semanchuk, Joseph
Mulvaney, Michael Kitt, Nicky Hewgill, Paul
Topping, peter royal, Richard Speed, Sentient
Meatbag, Tim Beachy, Dominic Le Garsmeur, Mark
Benson, Danny Kodicek, Deny Coughlan, Nick Kent,
Russ Anderson, Adam Kaczmarek, Andrea Vail, Andy
Shirling, Ben Chapman, ben cowell-thomas, Ben
Groom, Ben Sugden, Cat Conner, Centuries of
Sound, Claire Allen, Claire Zolkwer, Darren John
Harris, Dave The Hammer Parry, David Bond, David
Ellinor, Daz Wright, Emily Payne, Emma Nicol,
FuzzyFreaks, Gary Sharp, Gwyn Fisher, Hugh
Noble, Iain M Barker, Ilya olak-Anti, Jennifer
Moquin, Jim Lucking, John M, Jon Bounds, Lee
Ball, Louis E, Lyra Jay, Marc Lindberg, mark
madgwick, Matt Carr, Michael Bryan, Mr Flibble,
Neil Ives, Nick, Nigel Ford, Oli, Paul Bayfield,
Paul Slade, Peter Wood, Phil Barns, Rachel
Tougas, Richard Abraham, Richard Midwinter,
Robert Purkis, Robert Simpson, Rohan, Sam Brown,
Seirian Hanner, Sham Courtney, Simon Lumb,
Stephen McAuley, Stewart C. Russell, Stphane,
Swedemason, Ted Bowyer, Thepfy, Tim Polglase,
Tom Clark, Tony East, wigglywigglyworm, Adam
Tickner, Al Napp, Andrew Harris, Bobod, Chris
Ward, Jace Otting, James Meers, John Griffiths,
Paul Mancini, Rob Potter, Tanya Kant, Victoria
Wood, Graham Freeman, Caroline Kahn, Matt.
EDITORIAL THANKS: Monkeon & Matt Round
additional links; HappyToast for image challenge
help; and Dr Dunno for extra support. Proofing
by Kat E. Thanks Kat. (You’re welcome - Kat)
And thank you to newish Patreons Ben Rout, Tim
Clarke, Simon Balch, Clemence Saussez, Derek
Colley. Martin Pritchard, Stephanie Wissinger,
Dion Ashton and Paul Blanchard. Thanks to EVEN
NEWER ONES: Fadgebadger, Mark (Mavis), Joshua
Rackstraw, Mike Stringer, Eliot Beer, Harri
Bionic, Chris Lindley, Stuart B, Jon Morris
Smith, Daniel Malbon, James Heaver and Phil
Lovell. And further thanks to newer ones: Ben
Oliver, James Wise, Claire Turner, Omnipiss,
Lindsay Mclaughlin, Mellyfish, Simon Edwards,
Dave Wong & Stafford Lawrence. NEWEST - special
love to NEW PATREON Phillip Spowart. NEW NEWSEST
- extra love love love to si Jobling & Daniel
Calvin. And bonus new love to Douglas Pennant,
Roy Santos & Will Thompson. We love you. OH GOD,
and more bonus love to Alex Collin-Oakley, Phil
McGuire & Paul Blanchard - you sexy people. And
Mike Powell and Damion Brown and Ross Carter and
PJ. Ooooh and John Daly. Oooh oooh ooh and Rich
Corcoran. Love you. And a special thank you to
the super generous Paul Topping. And a thank you
to the return of Carlos Fandango. Much
appreciated Carl. OOH AND NEW ONES! Alistair
Murray Swodeck, nevillebartos, Blargity Blarg
Blarg. YAY! Oh and more thanks to Ian Walker,
Attila Eros, Calanish and Mike Wolcom. WE LOVE
YOU. And new new thanks to Dale Goodall, Gillian
Parrot, Albion Gray & Gary Alan Norton. Thank
you, you kind humans. And... Leighton Stevenson,
Ben Cowell-Thomas & Phil Bennett. Thx.
And do please donate as you get occasional
"bonus" content. Maybe.
https://www.patreon.com/b3ta
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: I'M SORRY I'VE WRITTEN A JOKE
Mehitabel_Itrang apologises for this
How did the Werewolf get its meal?
Deliveroo00oo00oo
https://b3ta.com/questions/imsorryivewrittenajoke/...
