Not a funny one for me, but might raise a laugh from you guys..A few years ago now I inherited a ferret called Fergie. It was the runt of the litter and the guy who owned the ferrets wanted to kill it but me (the fool) felt so sorry for it I took it home.
I made him a cage/run out of the hall cupboard and let him out at night to run about but he couldn’t run properly, he’d sort of drag himself around the room slowly by his front legs and then playfully bite your toes..
I took him to the vet who told me he was rather ill and probably shouldn’t have made it from the litter of babies and that he wouldn’t live long as he had something wrong with his brain and was slowly on his way out of this life with paralysis to come, which was why he couldn’t walk properly..
I wasn’t about to let the vet put him down so I took him home and worried, then I had the brilliant idea of strapping his bottom half to a children’s roller-skate !
It worked a treat, he flew round the living room floor faster than he’d ever moved, he headed for his food and water at speed rather than a struggle it was a joy to behold until I realized he couldn’t actually turn corners and would run full skate into walls.
It was always good fun to watch, but you had to keep picking him up and turning him round ‘cos he got stuck in corners or under the couch..
He didn’t live long, the paralysis got worse and I ended up feeding him by hand and giving him drinks a couple of times a night and then he died..
But the story doesn’t end there…
As I had nowhere to bury him in the flat I lived in but was moving in a matter of weeks to a house with a garden I decided to pop him into a shoebox and then into the freezer till I could give him a decent burial in my new garden..
I moved with the help of mates, a hire van and a few cars but when we got to the new house there was no sign of the frozen ferret anywhere.. Searches of the cars and van turned up no trace of the frozen Fergie anywhere..
I never did find out what happened to him, but someone finding a shoebox that day must have got one hell of a shock when they opened it to find a frozen ferret strapped onto a roller-skate
(I made him a cage/run out of the hall cupboard and let him out at night to run about but he couldn’t run properly, he’d sort of drag himself around the room slowly by his front legs and then playfully bite your toes..
I took him to the vet who told me he was rather ill and probably shouldn’t have made it from the litter of babies and that he wouldn’t live long as he had something wrong with his brain and was slowly on his way out of this life with paralysis to come, which was why he couldn’t walk properly..
I wasn’t about to let the vet put him down so I took him home and worried, then I had the brilliant idea of strapping his bottom half to a children’s roller-skate !
It worked a treat, he flew round the living room floor faster than he’d ever moved, he headed for his food and water at speed rather than a struggle it was a joy to behold until I realized he couldn’t actually turn corners and would run full skate into walls.
It was always good fun to watch, but you had to keep picking him up and turning him round ‘cos he got stuck in corners or under the couch..
He didn’t live long, the paralysis got worse and I ended up feeding him by hand and giving him drinks a couple of times a night and then he died..
But the story doesn’t end there…
As I had nowhere to bury him in the flat I lived in but was moving in a matter of weeks to a house with a garden I decided to pop him into a shoebox and then into the freezer till I could give him a decent burial in my new garden..
I moved with the help of mates, a hire van and a few cars but when we got to the new house there was no sign of the frozen ferret anywhere.. Searches of the cars and van turned up no trace of the frozen Fergie anywhere..
I never did find out what happened to him, but someone finding a shoebox that day must have got one hell of a shock when they opened it to find a frozen ferret strapped onto a roller-skate
Darryn.R,
Wed 15 Oct 2003, 14:38,
archived)
that's actually really sadbut in summarised form is radio-perfect... Sorry!
Just the whole not-turning part.
Fair fu(ks to you for giving him a decent chance though.
(Just the whole not-turning part.
Fair fu(ks to you for giving him a decent chance though.
WhoElse I'm what Willis was talking about,
Wed 15 Oct 2003, 15:12,
archived)