![[challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif "Challenge Entry: Why I Can't Sleep at Night"){kind=small}
annoying bastard
From the Why I Can't Sleep at Night challenge. See all 386 entries (closed)
(
manwithunderpantsonhead older than a Time Lord,
Mon 18 Oct 2004, 16:10,
archived)
That reminds me...September 22 2003
It has been a quiet day. Too quiet, but there is nothing I can do about that.
Now is the time for me to write about some strange things that happened to me last winter. I was hoping to save my story for the tabloids - I had assumed they would pay me a great deal of money to serialise my astonishing tale, but it seems that none of them are interested. Don't get me started about the state of the British press...
Anyway, it was last December and I was cleaning out my wardrobe. I had retrieved an old pair of socks from the back of the wardrobe when I was stunned to see a shaft of sunlight peeking through a crack at the back. This was very strange, since my wardrobe is nailed to a concrete wall, and concrete walls tend not to radiate natural light. I pushed at the wardrobe's flimsy wooden back and it gave way. So did I. I tumbled down through the hole and found myself in a strange and magical land.
Knowing my children's stories, I assumed that I had found a secret passage into the wondrous land of Narnia! What fun!
I looked around. It was a grey, bleak environment. I pulled myself to my feet and spotted a fat, middle-aged man standing by a bus-stop.
"Are you Mr Tumnus?" I asked him.
"What?" he replied.
"Mr Tumnus, the friendly fawn," I said.
"No. I'm Mick. Who the fuck are you?" He said. I believed him. He was not Mr Tumnus - Mr Tumnus had manners!
"So, this isn't Narnia?" I asked.
"No," he replied, rolling up his sleeves in a way that indicated imminent violence. "It's Barnsley."
And so it was! It seems that rather than finding a secret passage to Narnia, I had discovered a wormhole that transported me to Barnsley, South Yorkshire. I was disappointed. It cost me £50 to get a train home. I am not a rich man - £50 is a lot of money to me.
I know my story sound unbelievable, and indeed I was drinking heavily around that time, but I assure you it is all true.
(,
Mon 18 Oct 2004, 16:15,
archived)
It has been a quiet day. Too quiet, but there is nothing I can do about that.
Now is the time for me to write about some strange things that happened to me last winter. I was hoping to save my story for the tabloids - I had assumed they would pay me a great deal of money to serialise my astonishing tale, but it seems that none of them are interested. Don't get me started about the state of the British press...
Anyway, it was last December and I was cleaning out my wardrobe. I had retrieved an old pair of socks from the back of the wardrobe when I was stunned to see a shaft of sunlight peeking through a crack at the back. This was very strange, since my wardrobe is nailed to a concrete wall, and concrete walls tend not to radiate natural light. I pushed at the wardrobe's flimsy wooden back and it gave way. So did I. I tumbled down through the hole and found myself in a strange and magical land.
Knowing my children's stories, I assumed that I had found a secret passage into the wondrous land of Narnia! What fun!
I looked around. It was a grey, bleak environment. I pulled myself to my feet and spotted a fat, middle-aged man standing by a bus-stop.
"Are you Mr Tumnus?" I asked him.
"What?" he replied.
"Mr Tumnus, the friendly fawn," I said.
"No. I'm Mick. Who the fuck are you?" He said. I believed him. He was not Mr Tumnus - Mr Tumnus had manners!
"So, this isn't Narnia?" I asked.
"No," he replied, rolling up his sleeves in a way that indicated imminent violence. "It's Barnsley."
And so it was! It seems that rather than finding a secret passage to Narnia, I had discovered a wormhole that transported me to Barnsley, South Yorkshire. I was disappointed. It cost me £50 to get a train home. I am not a rich man - £50 is a lot of money to me.
I know my story sound unbelievable, and indeed I was drinking heavily around that time, but I assure you it is all true.
?You fucking loony - welcome, have a seat; there's cookies over there, you will never leave.
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Silentbob,
Mon 18 Oct 2004, 16:17,
archived)
TMWFA has been here over two years, BobBut I do agree he is a loon! ;0)
(,
Mon 18 Oct 2004, 16:22,
archived)
what a great storyI'm sure that one of them would buy it
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swaza I'm bad, I'm bad. You know it. I'm bad.,
Mon 18 Oct 2004, 16:18,
archived)
.Thats the funniest thing posted on here today!
Have a Woo for your tremendous memory. I remember that Monday very well to. and funnily enough for a completely different reason.
(Have a Woo for your tremendous memory. I remember that Monday very well to. and funnily enough for a completely different reason.
firstinch returns after about 10yrs,
Mon 18 Oct 2004, 16:20,
archived)
