![[challenge entry]](/images/board_posticon_c.gif "Challenge Entry: Modernise the Bible"){kind=small}
He knows kung fu.
From the Modernise the Bible challenge. See all 404 entries (closed)
(
Grampa,
Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:51,
archived)
Stop trying to heal my leprosyAND HEAL ME!
(
monkdagola but how do you TURN a phrase?,
Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:52,
archived)
who? Pierce Brosnan disguised as the bassist out of the Bangles? Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus,
Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:52,
archived)
Morris and his best friend Emeka have just finished a hectic game of squash and are showering in the club’s changing room. Morris looks over at Emeka and can’t help noticing how well endowed his friend is.
"Oy veh, Emekah," says Morris admiringly, "you lucky so and so! What a monster! That’s no shmekeleh you have there. Is it true that all black men are born that way?"
"No, you’re wrong there," replies Emeka, "in my case, I had to work hard at growing its size."
"What do you mean by that?" asks Morris.
"Well," replies Emeka, "when I was younger, my mother told me to tie a brick to the end my penis with a piece of string. She told me to walk around for 30mins each night to get the benefits of the pulling effect. I did this for 3 months and well, … you can now see the results."
Morris can’t wait to tell his wife. As soon as he gets back home, he shouts out "Sadie, I’ve decided to take one month off work. Please cancel all our forthcoming engagements. Cancel our bridge nights. I’ve decided to go get a bigger shmekeleh."
For the next month, Morris stays at home and walks around all day in his dressing gown. Under the dressing gown is a large brick tied to his shmekeleh with strong string. After a month of this, Sadie says to Morris, "OK, Morris, let’s see how it’s doing."
Morris undoes his dressing gown and they both look. After a few seconds, Morris says, "See, Sadie, what did I tell you? The plan is working. I’m halfway there – it’s already gone black."
("Oy veh, Emekah," says Morris admiringly, "you lucky so and so! What a monster! That’s no shmekeleh you have there. Is it true that all black men are born that way?"
"No, you’re wrong there," replies Emeka, "in my case, I had to work hard at growing its size."
"What do you mean by that?" asks Morris.
"Well," replies Emeka, "when I was younger, my mother told me to tie a brick to the end my penis with a piece of string. She told me to walk around for 30mins each night to get the benefits of the pulling effect. I did this for 3 months and well, … you can now see the results."
Morris can’t wait to tell his wife. As soon as he gets back home, he shouts out "Sadie, I’ve decided to take one month off work. Please cancel all our forthcoming engagements. Cancel our bridge nights. I’ve decided to go get a bigger shmekeleh."
For the next month, Morris stays at home and walks around all day in his dressing gown. Under the dressing gown is a large brick tied to his shmekeleh with strong string. After a month of this, Sadie says to Morris, "OK, Morris, let’s see how it’s doing."
Morris undoes his dressing gown and they both look. After a few seconds, Morris says, "See, Sadie, what did I tell you? The plan is working. I’m halfway there – it’s already gone black."
Grampa,
Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:58,
archived)