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NEWSLETTER: "INSERT TOPICAL FIFA JOKE WRITTEN BY NON-FOOTBALL FANS HERE"

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This Week:
* BLAKE'S SEVEN - Servalan sings Floyd
* LINKEDIN - sings Bohemian Rhapsody
* CHOCOLATE - diet science hoax

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________  ____ __  ___
____/  _)|_  // /_/ _ | "We're saving the cloud    
___/  _ |/_ </ __/ __ | on floppy disks because
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_|     you never know"

B3ta email 666  - 29th May 2015

Read this issue backwards to summon The Devil:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue666

Friend b3ta on Facebook: 
https://www.facebook.com/b3tan

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: SPONSORED LINK
  Buy some fucking magnets

  We bought a load of tiny magnets the other day
  - ostensibly for sticking stuff on the fridge
  but instead spend a good couple of hours
  playing with them. This is how we party at B3ta
  Towers and you can join in too.  
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00AAWEH9... 


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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK

  >> LinkedIn Bohemian Rhapsody <<
  "Timewasting puntastic voyeurism. And Queen,"
  brags merkinhead. This is actually pretty
  amazing.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Soc_Media_Rhapsody


  >> Ant music <<
  "I love Ants so much I did a song about them,"
  explains fred zeppelin. Excell-ANT!
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1307250/


  >> Linda McCartney! <<
  "Be very careful what you wish for b3ta," warns
  thecrapgatsby - then goes on to blame Kirstie
  Allsopp for this... musical EXTRAVAGANZA. 
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Linda_McCartney


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: CAPTION COMPETITION
  George Osborne and his hand of death

  This photo appeared during the election and for
  some reason few picked up on it. But by God -
  what happened to George Osborne's hands?

  It's like he's been touched by death.
https://goo.gl/pBVqLQ


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: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
  Results from the 'Dog Albums' challenge

  Last week wanted to see what music dogs listen
  to and the glorious album artwork that would
  contain it.
 
  Your favourites included:

  * Floyd: The Bark Side of the Moon. (AndyR)
http://b3ta.com/board/11151731

  * Numan: It’s the only way to live. (monkeon)
http://b3ta.com/board/11152046

  * Devo: Nice hat. (HappyToast)
http://b3ta.com/board/11152020
  
  All these images, and a load more can be
  found here:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/dogalbums/

 
  >> New challenge: Teeth <<
  This week it’s all about the gnashers,
  choppers, grills and Hampstead Heath. Brush up
  your old pictures and pull out some new ones.
  Show us your teeth and make us smile.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/teeth/


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: SITES IN BRIEF
  Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates
  
  * Fascinating story about setting up a bogus
  health claim that "chocolate helps slim" to see
  if the media will bite. Spoiler: they do. They
  really REALLY do. 
http://goo.gl/DKKL4h


  * An app that turns any part of your display
  into a playable level of Super Mario Bros.
  Finally.
http://aaronrandall.com/blog/screentendo 


  * These stereotypes about white people remind
  us of National Lampoon's Vacation. 
http://goo.gl/Fsa2HB


  * The "paracetamolchallenge" is supposedly a
  'craze' of teenagers daring each other to take
  too much paracetamol. But Snopes is calling it
  out as bollocks along the lines of 'rainbow
  parties'.

  Their evidence? The supposed social media trend
  hasn't left much of a trace on social media.
  Looks like it was concocted by the papers.
http://m.snopes.com/2015/05/26/paracetamol-challen...


  * Your Silicon Valley job title is...
http://siliconvalleyjobtitlegenerator.tumblr.com/


  * Want some nice pixel-art gifs? Of course you do!
http://1041uuu.tumblr.com/


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Follow @b3ta on Twitter: 
https://twitter.com/b3ta

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: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
  Like books without the hard reading bit 

  * Servalan from Blake's 7 sings Pink Floyd
https://t.co/EHv4dO5RFe


  * Taylor Swift Rotoscoped - 49 Australian
  animation students were each given 52 frames of
  Taylor Swift's Shake it Off music video, and
  together they produced 2,767 frames of lovingly
  hand-drawn rotoscoped animation footage. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch


  * Alien remade with an office stapler
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Xenostapler


  * This man is better at making animal sounds
  than you
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Animal_sound_Man


  * Gail Platt Caught Red-Handed (partially NSFW)
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Gail_Platt_Caught_Red_Ha...


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: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
  Follow-ups on previous stories

  * STRANGE MOANING ABOUT PISSING ON PLANTS:
  CONTINUED - krang writes, "Urine may be an
  excellent fertiliser, but don't use it on a pot
  plant. Especially one in a tiny bathroom which
  catches the sun in the evening. It smells like
  a cockroach's foreskin."


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    Love it:  [email protected]
   Shove it:  [email protected]

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  THANKS:
  This issue was written by Rob Manuel with
  David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by planearm,
  Pazuzu and tits.
  Image challenge by Fraser Lewry.
  Mike Trinder is QOTW bloke.
  Top tip via SS express.

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Friend b3ta on Facebook: 
https://www.facebook.com/b3tan

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  TOP TIP:
  Kraft cheese slices make ideal patches for
  heavy cheese eaters who are trying to cut down


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