NEWSLETTER: "INSERT TOPICAL FIFA JOKE WRITTEN BY NON-FOOTBALL FANS HERE"
This Week:
* BLAKE'S SEVEN - Servalan sings Floyd
* LINKEDIN - sings Bohemian Rhapsody
* CHOCOLATE - diet science hoax
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________ ____ __ ___
____/ _)|_ // /_/ _ | "We're saving the cloud
___/ _ |/_ </ __/ __ | on floppy disks because
__/____/____/\__/_/ |_| you never know"
B3ta email 666 - 29th May 2015
Read this issue backwards to summon The Devil:
http://b3ta.com/newsletter/issue666
Friend b3ta on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/b3tan
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: SPONSORED LINK
Buy some fucking magnets
We bought a load of tiny magnets the other day
- ostensibly for sticking stuff on the fridge
but instead spend a good couple of hours
playing with them. This is how we party at B3ta
Towers and you can join in too.
http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00AAWEH9...
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: WHAT B3TA PEOPLE HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS WEEK
>> LinkedIn Bohemian Rhapsody <<
"Timewasting puntastic voyeurism. And Queen,"
brags merkinhead. This is actually pretty
amazing.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Soc_Media_Rhapsody
>> Ant music <<
"I love Ants so much I did a song about them,"
explains fred zeppelin. Excell-ANT!
http://www.b3ta.com/links/1307250/
>> Linda McCartney! <<
"Be very careful what you wish for b3ta," warns
thecrapgatsby - then goes on to blame Kirstie
Allsopp for this... musical EXTRAVAGANZA.
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Linda_McCartney
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: CAPTION COMPETITION
George Osborne and his hand of death
This photo appeared during the election and for
some reason few picked up on it. But by God -
what happened to George Osborne's hands?
It's like he's been touched by death.
https://goo.gl/pBVqLQ
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: B3TA IMAGE CHALLENGE
Results from the 'Dog Albums' challenge
Last week wanted to see what music dogs listen
to and the glorious album artwork that would
contain it.
Your favourites included:
* Floyd: The Bark Side of the Moon. (AndyR)
http://b3ta.com/board/11151731
* Numan: It’s the only way to live. (monkeon)
http://b3ta.com/board/11152046
* Devo: Nice hat. (HappyToast)
http://b3ta.com/board/11152020
All these images, and a load more can be
found here:
http://b3ta.com/challenge/dogalbums/
>> New challenge: Teeth <<
This week it’s all about the gnashers,
choppers, grills and Hampstead Heath. Brush up
your old pictures and pull out some new ones.
Show us your teeth and make us smile.
http://b3ta.com/challenge/teeth/
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: SITES IN BRIEF
Stuff we like that wasn't made by our mates
* Fascinating story about setting up a bogus
health claim that "chocolate helps slim" to see
if the media will bite. Spoiler: they do. They
really REALLY do.
http://goo.gl/DKKL4h
* An app that turns any part of your display
into a playable level of Super Mario Bros.
Finally.
http://aaronrandall.com/blog/screentendo
* These stereotypes about white people remind
us of National Lampoon's Vacation.
http://goo.gl/Fsa2HB
* The "paracetamolchallenge" is supposedly a
'craze' of teenagers daring each other to take
too much paracetamol. But Snopes is calling it
out as bollocks along the lines of 'rainbow
parties'.
Their evidence? The supposed social media trend
hasn't left much of a trace on social media.
Looks like it was concocted by the papers.
http://m.snopes.com/2015/05/26/paracetamol-challen...
* Your Silicon Valley job title is...
http://siliconvalleyjobtitlegenerator.tumblr.com/
* Want some nice pixel-art gifs? Of course you do!
http://1041uuu.tumblr.com/
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Follow @b3ta on Twitter:
https://twitter.com/b3ta
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: VIDEO SCHMIDEO
Like books without the hard reading bit
* Servalan from Blake's 7 sings Pink Floyd
https://t.co/EHv4dO5RFe
* Taylor Swift Rotoscoped - 49 Australian
animation students were each given 52 frames of
Taylor Swift's Shake it Off music video, and
together they produced 2,767 frames of lovingly
hand-drawn rotoscoped animation footage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch
* Alien remade with an office stapler
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Xenostapler
* This man is better at making animal sounds
than you
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Animal_sound_Man
* Gail Platt Caught Red-Handed (partially NSFW)
http://www.b3ta.com/links/Gail_Platt_Caught_Red_Ha...
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: WHAT HAPPENED NEXT?
Follow-ups on previous stories
* STRANGE MOANING ABOUT PISSING ON PLANTS:
CONTINUED - krang writes, "Urine may be an
excellent fertiliser, but don't use it on a pot
plant. Especially one in a tiny bathroom which
catches the sun in the evening. It smells like
a cockroach's foreskin."
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Love it: [email protected]
Shove it: [email protected]
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THANKS:
This issue was written by Rob Manuel with
David Stevenson. Stuff sent in by planearm,
Pazuzu and tits.
Image challenge by Fraser Lewry.
Mike Trinder is QOTW bloke.
Top tip via SS express.
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Friend b3ta on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/b3tan
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TOP TIP:
Kraft cheese slices make ideal patches for
heavy cheese eaters who are trying to cut down
