» The Dirty Secrets of Your Trade

Medical theatres
Signs in front of theatres that say about theatre attire must be worn beyond this sign are not applicable to anyone who is mildly educated as germs (MRSA, Clostridium difficle) don't stick to trainee and above surgeons, or anaesthetists.

When coming for your operation, we need you to have not eaten for 6 hours because you might inhale your own vomit. No food or drink means no mints, chewing gum, biscuits or milky tea. Nothing to do with us being hungry as well.

Hospital policy is always being broken, mindbending drugs should not be given to patients before they are consented, as they may get the wrong idea about the operation they're are about to have.

Threatening to leave as your operation is delayed isn't a very effective way of getting you bumped up the list. It'll just annoy people.
(Mon 1st Oct 2007, 11:39, More)

» Shoddy Presents

Multiple crap presentness
My mum received a spanky new washing machine for valentines, V. romantic considering the twat who gave it to her effectively stole that money from my gran for his "business" (£75,000 in total)
The usual hideous sweater with overly coloured christmas trees and stuff on (our family now wears them round work at christmas for laughs)
About a decades worth of novelty slippers in many amusing and cute shapes, almost guarunteed to help you fall down stairs, nice.
My mother also keeps giving me "fun" kitchen utensils despite the fact I hate cooking and have no intention of spending any longer in the kitchen than I have to.
Loving (and batty) mother has also given me Parker fountain pens on more than one occasion, possibly as a hint to improve my writing.
(Fri 24th Sep 2004, 14:03, More)