Profile for Aardvark:
Want to greet me on /talk? Use The Official Aardvark Greeting Generator.
Thanks a million to the insanely talented and handsome Gilgamesh for that. I don't know how I ever got on without it.
THE GALLERY OF AARDVARKS
Scott drew this for me. I'm dead chuffed with it. Little was I to know when he drew it that it would be the first of many. It still holds a special place in my heart though.
This very happy-looking Aardvark comes from the delightful Spangolin. She is a talented person indeed! Many, many thanks go to her for her fine contribution.
This Aardvark was drawn for me by Woking Girl. She earns eternal respect and gratitude for it.
This Aardvark was drawn by Malaka * * *. He is a fine human being and worthy of wonderful karma for the rest of his life.
This Aardvark having a lovely birthday also comes from the Malaka * * * collection, drawn for my 3rd b3taday. Note the use of vibrant colours and childish scribblings, typical of the period.
I can't resist pictures drawn for me, and this one comes from the lovely Moohalaa. He certainly has a unique style, but the effort that went into the picture is plain to see. Mad props and shizzle and whatever the kids say these days go to him.
Yet another aardvark birthday, this time from BruceTaylor. He's a smashing chap for this. I must try to remember his b3taday and draw something for it.
This Aardvark was drawn by the delectable WebWench. Despite her protests of modesty, it's a smashing picture. I love it.
This aardvark comes from King Baby Duck. He's really caught the essence of an aardvark here. I'm very pleased with it.
This aardvark is the creation of broadsword. The stylised warping of the aardvark's form obviously reflects his own internal warpings, at least in regard to aardvarks. As with all the others I've received, I love it.
Dobsky drew this strange aardvark. Of course it's fantastic, but I wonder how this depiction conveys his feelings about aardvarks. Perhaps the mammaries are meant to have some deeper symbolic meaning? Maybe we shall never know.
This aardvark is the work of Wildheart Baby. It's small, but wonderfully formed. I treasure it just as much as any other aardvark in my collection.
Lord Gnome was the creator of this fine aardvark. The cartoony style really captures the essence as well as the humour of an aardvark. It's wonderful.
This fantastic aardvark is the work of Todd the Groincrusher. It's quite sublime in its stylings. Her artistic talent really does justice to the wonderful animal that is the aardvark. And it's got a fez on! Just looking at it fills me with glee.
MooCow Byter made this tiny but lovely aardvark. You can only see it if you look closely enough, but it's worth doing. Isn't it precious?
This tremendous aardvark is the work of Spider Riviera (formerly Strider of Eire). They say the eyes are the windows of the soul, and this aardvark is certainly hiding something in its soul. It's a chilling depiction, and earns a proud place in this artistic collection.
This aardvark was drawn by the wonderful Cowfoot. It's a study in monochrome reductivism, or something. It also overemploys the letter A, to tremendous effect. I bloody love it.
JackAction fashioned this aardvark out of love and crayon. He's a talented young man. It's certainly a welcome addition to the gallery.
Not content with the already fantastic addition she made to this gallery, Bob Todd went ahead and drew another aardvark for my birthday! Isn't it delightful? It's kind of creepy, but in a wonderful way.
Dangermouse [AKA Webclam] screamed my name in .wav format :
Here it is.
You may Gaz me if you need an e-mail address to contact me. I do have one. I can't envision any reason why you might though.
I don't do /board, I am an exclusive /talk inhabitant. This is not because I can't draw. Not at all.
If you're on that Xbox Live thingy, you can be my friend by registering me. I am on there as MrAardvark. Don't forget to let me know who you are though.
A poem I wrote for my 5000th post:
When you've not been on /talk for long
The banter's strange, the jokes are wrong.
But when you've hung around a while
You find you start to like the style.
You strikethrough posts to make a joke
Implying someone paid a bloke
To fuck them for 11p,
And tell folks what you had for tea.
Before you know it you're sucked in
And words like "mimsy" make you grin
And that's when there's no hope for you
You are a /talker, through and through.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
[read all their answers]
- a member for 8 years, 9 months and 19 days
- has posted 0 messages on the main board
- has posted 23441 messages on the talk board
- has posted 97 messages on the links board
- (including 20 links)
- has posted 10 stories and 5 replies on question of the week
- They liked 2 pictures, 28 links, 208 talk posts, and 20 qotw answers. [RSS feed]
- Ignore this user
- Add this user as a friend
- send me a message
Want to greet me on /talk? Use The Official Aardvark Greeting Generator.
Thanks a million to the insanely talented and handsome Gilgamesh for that. I don't know how I ever got on without it.
THE GALLERY OF AARDVARKS
Scott drew this for me. I'm dead chuffed with it. Little was I to know when he drew it that it would be the first of many. It still holds a special place in my heart though.
This very happy-looking Aardvark comes from the delightful Spangolin. She is a talented person indeed! Many, many thanks go to her for her fine contribution.
This Aardvark was drawn for me by Woking Girl. She earns eternal respect and gratitude for it.
This Aardvark was drawn by Malaka * * *. He is a fine human being and worthy of wonderful karma for the rest of his life.
This Aardvark having a lovely birthday also comes from the Malaka * * * collection, drawn for my 3rd b3taday. Note the use of vibrant colours and childish scribblings, typical of the period.
I can't resist pictures drawn for me, and this one comes from the lovely Moohalaa. He certainly has a unique style, but the effort that went into the picture is plain to see. Mad props and shizzle and whatever the kids say these days go to him.
Yet another aardvark birthday, this time from BruceTaylor. He's a smashing chap for this. I must try to remember his b3taday and draw something for it.
This Aardvark was drawn by the delectable WebWench. Despite her protests of modesty, it's a smashing picture. I love it.
This aardvark comes from King Baby Duck. He's really caught the essence of an aardvark here. I'm very pleased with it.
This aardvark is the creation of broadsword. The stylised warping of the aardvark's form obviously reflects his own internal warpings, at least in regard to aardvarks. As with all the others I've received, I love it.
Dobsky drew this strange aardvark. Of course it's fantastic, but I wonder how this depiction conveys his feelings about aardvarks. Perhaps the mammaries are meant to have some deeper symbolic meaning? Maybe we shall never know.
This aardvark is the work of Wildheart Baby. It's small, but wonderfully formed. I treasure it just as much as any other aardvark in my collection.
Lord Gnome was the creator of this fine aardvark. The cartoony style really captures the essence as well as the humour of an aardvark. It's wonderful.
This fantastic aardvark is the work of Todd the Groincrusher. It's quite sublime in its stylings. Her artistic talent really does justice to the wonderful animal that is the aardvark. And it's got a fez on! Just looking at it fills me with glee.
MooCow Byter made this tiny but lovely aardvark. You can only see it if you look closely enough, but it's worth doing. Isn't it precious?
This tremendous aardvark is the work of Spider Riviera (formerly Strider of Eire). They say the eyes are the windows of the soul, and this aardvark is certainly hiding something in its soul. It's a chilling depiction, and earns a proud place in this artistic collection.
This aardvark was drawn by the wonderful Cowfoot. It's a study in monochrome reductivism, or something. It also overemploys the letter A, to tremendous effect. I bloody love it.
JackAction fashioned this aardvark out of love and crayon. He's a talented young man. It's certainly a welcome addition to the gallery.
Not content with the already fantastic addition she made to this gallery, Bob Todd went ahead and drew another aardvark for my birthday! Isn't it delightful? It's kind of creepy, but in a wonderful way.
Dangermouse [AKA Webclam] screamed my name in .wav format :
Here it is.
You may Gaz me if you need an e-mail address to contact me. I do have one. I can't envision any reason why you might though.
I don't do /board, I am an exclusive /talk inhabitant. This is not because I can't draw. Not at all.
If you're on that Xbox Live thingy, you can be my friend by registering me. I am on there as MrAardvark. Don't forget to let me know who you are though.
A poem I wrote for my 5000th post:
When you've not been on /talk for long
The banter's strange, the jokes are wrong.
But when you've hung around a while
You find you start to like the style.
You strikethrough posts to make a joke
Implying someone paid a bloke
To fuck them for 11p,
And tell folks what you had for tea.
Before you know it you're sucked in
And words like "mimsy" make you grin
And that's when there's no hope for you
You are a /talker, through and through.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Road Trip
The Mongol Rally
For me, it's a shame that this is being asked now instead of in a month or so, as next week Chenobble and I are setting off on the Mongol Rally - a 10,000 mile drive, across inhospitably mountainous and deserty terrain, in a Nissan Micra. With a b3ta sticker on the back, of course.
We predict that it will take us a month and will either be the best of mates or never speak again, by the time it's over.
You can follow our progress (and donate money to an extremely worthy cause) at our blog: www.teamherdingcats.blogspot.com - we intend to update as often as we can. Though the lack of internet cafes in the wildest desert parts of Mongolia means that updates will probably be sporadic.
Sorry this is me spamming our blog, instead of a tale of a past road trip - we'll have plenty of tales to tell when we get back though. Ask again later.
(Sat 16th Jul 2011, 17:09, More)
The Mongol Rally
For me, it's a shame that this is being asked now instead of in a month or so, as next week Chenobble and I are setting off on the Mongol Rally - a 10,000 mile drive, across inhospitably mountainous and deserty terrain, in a Nissan Micra. With a b3ta sticker on the back, of course.
We predict that it will take us a month and will either be the best of mates or never speak again, by the time it's over.
You can follow our progress (and donate money to an extremely worthy cause) at our blog: www.teamherdingcats.blogspot.com - we intend to update as often as we can. Though the lack of internet cafes in the wildest desert parts of Mongolia means that updates will probably be sporadic.
Sorry this is me spamming our blog, instead of a tale of a past road trip - we'll have plenty of tales to tell when we get back though. Ask again later.
(Sat 16th Jul 2011, 17:09, More)
» My computer gave away my secrets
Only slightly dodgy
Autocomplete on Google Image Search allowed a few of us to find out that our friend had an "outdoor sex" fetish. Whatever floats your boat, I guess.
No-one else gets to use my computer, so I'm not getting caught by autocomplete. No-one will ever know what I search for... and this is probably for the best.
(Fri 10th Feb 2006, 11:16, More)
Only slightly dodgy
Autocomplete on Google Image Search allowed a few of us to find out that our friend had an "outdoor sex" fetish. Whatever floats your boat, I guess.
No-one else gets to use my computer, so I'm not getting caught by autocomplete. No-one will ever know what I search for... and this is probably for the best.
(Fri 10th Feb 2006, 11:16, More)
» Birthdays
Another
Just remembered another one, when I was 6 I was due to have a big party, all my friends from my crappy little village school were coming, and my mum had prepared lots of jelly, sausage rolls, a cake, and everything else a 6 year-old could want for a party. About two hours before it was due to start, however, my best friend's mum called to say that my mate couldn't come, he had chicken pox. The phone went again, another mum saying her kid had the pox. The phone rang constantly for an hour or so, and it seemed pretty much every kid in the village had the pox and so couldn't come. The whole event looked like it was going to be a washout. Then my mum noticed the little red spots appearing on me...
She called everyone back and got them to send their kids anyway, since we were all infected it wouldn't make much difference. So my first ever themed party was a chicken pox party.
When everyone had gone at the end of the day, it was discovered that my older sister now had chicken pox, despite avoiding the party and all the infected kids. Result.
(Fri 9th Dec 2005, 12:58, More)
Another
Just remembered another one, when I was 6 I was due to have a big party, all my friends from my crappy little village school were coming, and my mum had prepared lots of jelly, sausage rolls, a cake, and everything else a 6 year-old could want for a party. About two hours before it was due to start, however, my best friend's mum called to say that my mate couldn't come, he had chicken pox. The phone went again, another mum saying her kid had the pox. The phone rang constantly for an hour or so, and it seemed pretty much every kid in the village had the pox and so couldn't come. The whole event looked like it was going to be a washout. Then my mum noticed the little red spots appearing on me...
She called everyone back and got them to send their kids anyway, since we were all infected it wouldn't make much difference. So my first ever themed party was a chicken pox party.
When everyone had gone at the end of the day, it was discovered that my older sister now had chicken pox, despite avoiding the party and all the infected kids. Result.
(Fri 9th Dec 2005, 12:58, More)
» Birthdays
My worst
My worst birthday was my 20th - I was at uni and went out drinking with friends and my girlfriend. My girlfriend dumped me, my friends accidentally (they said) left me to fall asleep slumped against a lamp post in the city centre, and I had to walk home as I had no money.
My best birthday was the following year, my 21st, when we filled the implausibly large student house we had with drunken party goers. The game of crab football (football played on all fours) that my sister organised upstairs was great fun, till we came back downstairs to find one of the chandeliers had fallen down. Yes, chandeliers. They should never have let students live in a house like that.
(Fri 9th Dec 2005, 11:19, More)
My worst
My worst birthday was my 20th - I was at uni and went out drinking with friends and my girlfriend. My girlfriend dumped me, my friends accidentally (they said) left me to fall asleep slumped against a lamp post in the city centre, and I had to walk home as I had no money.
My best birthday was the following year, my 21st, when we filled the implausibly large student house we had with drunken party goers. The game of crab football (football played on all fours) that my sister organised upstairs was great fun, till we came back downstairs to find one of the chandeliers had fallen down. Yes, chandeliers. They should never have let students live in a house like that.
(Fri 9th Dec 2005, 11:19, More)
» Fire!
It burns, it burns!
A semi-entertaining practice I was introduced to as a poor and bored student was setting fire to the fluff on your socks. As long as your socks have a reasonable covering of fluff, you can watch a mini Armageddon-style expanding ring of fire engulf your whole foot. It looks like it should hurt but it just warms your foot nicely. Try this at home, kids!
However, expanding this idea to include my quite fluffy dressing gown wasn't so much fun. My entire body was suddenly covered in sizeable flames, which probably would have burned out quite quickly and harmlessly, but were more than enough to shit me up good and proper. There's not much dignity in rolling around on the floor in just a dressing gown, gibbering in panic, while your housemates look on and laugh.
(Sun 6th Nov 2005, 3:08, More)
It burns, it burns!
A semi-entertaining practice I was introduced to as a poor and bored student was setting fire to the fluff on your socks. As long as your socks have a reasonable covering of fluff, you can watch a mini Armageddon-style expanding ring of fire engulf your whole foot. It looks like it should hurt but it just warms your foot nicely. Try this at home, kids!
However, expanding this idea to include my quite fluffy dressing gown wasn't so much fun. My entire body was suddenly covered in sizeable flames, which probably would have burned out quite quickly and harmlessly, but were more than enough to shit me up good and proper. There's not much dignity in rolling around on the floor in just a dressing gown, gibbering in panic, while your housemates look on and laugh.
(Sun 6th Nov 2005, 3:08, More)